Posts Tagged ‘USA’

June 24, 2004

Austin – day two

4 years ago, when I was here, I went to a restaurant to whack the most unbelievably cheap steaks that money could buy. For 11 bucks eat-all-you-can, you’ll never go to Victoria Station ever again after consuming those lard laden greasy food. I ate till I was almost immobile with another Malaysian colleague.

I searched for that restaurant again today, and finally found it after making a lot of illegal U-turns. And that was how I had the plan set for dinner tonight. I told Cheecheongfun (you know, the guy from China?) that we’re gonna whack some serious food that tonight, and be prepared to get himself killed (I can’t believe I actually said that in Mandarin, you should have seen his face man).

So we went there at dinner time. The first thing that I attacked was steak. Had plenty of them… and some serious supply of meatballs. My appetite was good tonight so, I didn’t hold back. I was planning to eat a few days’ supply of food in one take.

But before I could finish my first plate, I was confronted with a problem. The acoustic level of someone eating like a pig. That’s right – Cheecheongfun was at it again. The family of blimps opposite the table of ours was kinda like checking him out. He was eating so boisterously, that I was caught in a dilemma of whether to tell him to shut up. But I was afraid that guy might feel offended and stuff, and it would be uncool to do that. I was convincing myself that maybe it is a cultural thing of having the need to eat like a pig but, I can tell you that not much people can tolerate that.

As if it wasn’t bad enough, Cheecheongfun suddenly gave out a shrill burp. More like a yelp. Gas escaping from his throat to the open air. So loud, that even he himself was dumbfucked and he had to cover his own mouth in embarrassment. You know what was his problem? The guy ate too fast… too loud… and when he gulped in a large quantity of soda, the gas had nowhere to escape but through his stinking mouth. I was lucky that there wasn’t anything came projectiling out of his mouth onto my face. I was at verge of stabbing him with my fork… but of course I didn’t. I went on eating with him… but it wasn’t as enjoyable when you’re doing it with someone disgusting.

Anyway, I was thinking of venturing for more great food this weekend at San Antonio… but with this guy tagging around, I’m not even sure if it is a good idea anymore… Kanneh…

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June 23, 2004

Austin – day one & two (day of work)

There is not a lot of beautiful people in Austin. Most of them are overweight. That is because they eat big portions of food. The diet stuff they eat alone could cause chronic cellulite, and the high fat content ones could cause instant heart attack.

But not the receptionist at the lab I was visiting though. That chick’s hot. And friendly too. She’s blond… she’s tall… and the most important of all, she has big tits. A bit saggy but, it was the right amount of sag.

And that was why I had a great day today. Especially when she bent down to help me page my host at the lobby this morning. In case any of you wondered, she did wear a bra. Too bad but, it was alright. It wasn’t hard to imagine her not wearing any.

My hosts are a bunch of great guys. The one that I was assigned to, is an avid gamer and a wave surfer from California called Dave. He wore a bermuda shorts to work this morning and is anything but serious. Another one is a biker, 6 ft something and over 300 pounds named Keith. That guy could seriously tip a full grown cow with that sheer size of his. Tells a lot of crude jokes and that guy even showed me plenty of pictures of him & buddies partying in a bike fest, complete with the boobies flashing and stuff. Another one is called Jase. Don’t know much about him because that guy’s a bit quiet than the rest but no less friendly.

During our lunch yesterday (first day), Jason asked me,

Jase : “You’ll be seeing Keith wearing his traditional attire on his upcoming cultural festival..”

Me : “Yeah? So what will he be wearing?”

Dave : “A kilt. You know what’s a kilt?”

Me : “I know. The man skirt. So you’re a Scottish Keith?”

Keith : “Yeah I’m a Scottish alright.”

Me : “Just wondering, you guys wearing anything under the kilt?”

Keith : “Nope. Absolutely nothing. Naked inside. It’s easier to do it man. Just ride over the girls, flip the kilt over ‘em, and that’s it…”

all of us : [laugh our daylights out]

A light day of work today. Came to work late… long breaks… and early dismissal. How I’d wish it is like this back home.

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June 22, 2004

Austin – arrival

Alright, I’m now a bit sobered after crashing and passing out for 2 consecutive days. I guess my fatigue can be called a jet lag – although I claimed that I’m not suffering from it.

That day, when I arrived at Dallas airport, I only had like 1 hour and 20 minutes to transit from an international arrival to a domestic flight. During this period, I had to go through the immigration, to pick up my bags, to go through a series of mind boggling procedures and to check in my bags again. And all that location was segregated from each other on different buildings… you know, old American airports. They’re always big and confusing.

When I was at the immigration, I was brought into a room. No I don’t think I look like a terrorist but, somehow, I was ‘required’ to take an oath and register a series of information about myself – like where do I live, what’s my father’s name… have I ever killed someone… things like that. I was kind of surprised myself as the few Japanese guys before me that looked like mutated insects didn’t have to go through all that. So, I think this must be the capital M thing about our country. (hint: a religion)

So, by the time I completed all the procedures with a computer illiterate immigration officer (which I had to teach him some shortcut keys to cut down the time), I was left with only like 10 minutes to rush for the flight… and the journey to the next terminal alone took me 5 minutes with a bus, had to checkout and check in my bags at the same time and perform a few hundred meters worth of running. Did I make it? Hell no. It was impossible. The big queue at the security check point alone, where everyone was required to take out their notebooks… remove the shoes… etc would have taken more than 10 minutes.

But I got myself onto another flight alright – which was located on the other side of the airport. And I had to travel all the way back to where it began. This time, luckily, I was not required to go through any more security checks. No they don’t perform strip search on anybody. That’s a myth. I think.

Arrived at Austin at about 1pm. Had to locate for my bags as I had them checked in through the earlier flight that I missed. After spending like 20 minutes doing that, I finally located my bags and proceeded to the rent-a-car counter.

Got myself a Camry, with a GPS navigation device called Never Get Lost (or something like that). To operate the thing, all that was required to do is key in any location, and that sucker will direct me to the destination… which at my first impression, was pretty cool. But I was so wrong. That hotel that I made a reservation with? Actually has 3 branches in Austin. The Never Get Lost doohickey got me to the 2 other locations except the correct one. It wasn’t really that 100% effective. I eventually had to get a map from a blond chick at the wrong hotel and managed to get myself to the correct hotel on my own

Upon arrival at the hotel, I tested out the free broadband out and crashed not long after that, slept until the next morning.

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