Alright, if it’s still not that obvious enough, I actually went to Johnson Space Center at Houston on day 6. That’s right, drove 4 fucking hours just to get a feel on how the congested traffic of Houston’s like … and then to visit the ever screwed up Space center.

Johnson Space Center is the place where those Americans launched all those rockets up to space - in case you wondered what the hell is the place all about. American space disaster films always portrayed a hero astronaut chanting the magic words “Houston, we have a problem.” - each time they faced a life threatening situation. That’s the place they’re talking about.

So, was the place fun ? Hell no. It’s a big disappointment for me. Well… and my friends too. Even slouches like cheecheongfun felt that the place sucks big time. Here are the reasons why :

1) the building looked chintzy from outside. It looked like some kind of factory outlet in some part of china that sells fake pearls to rip off tourists. Admission fee is USD 22.50 — which is fucking expensive. I could have used the money to visit some stripper’s club (admission only 5 bucks and plus another 5 for a beer)… and yet, have enough money to call for a good lap dance from a busty blonde.

2) my expectation was to see some space related items. Maybe a couple of moonrocks or perhaps some sort of weird minerals they found on foreign piece of rock. But no. The first thing we saw was a commercialized lobby with kids screaming and running all over the place. No it doesn’t look like a space center at all. It’s a cheesy theme park.

3) Theme park it was - that kinda made us readjust our expectations. Hoping that it’s a GOOD theme park. Roller coaster ride on a space shuttle shaped cart or something. But again, hell no. What do they have then ? Some stupid guy boasting stories about their space program and budget with a cheap 3D animated scenes on the background (it’s animated using Corel’s Poser program … which, I myself could model WAY BETTER than their 3D artist)… and some model interior of the shuttle cockpit. Then they have this stupid mini theater with a malfunctioned audio. Houston … we have a big fucking problem.

4) Alright. That’s pretty much about the so called “theme park”. There’s a tram ride to the actual Space center research facilities. Cool - we thought. We finally get to see some real spacecraft or maybe some cool exhibits concerning the space program. First, we had to endure the long queue of crowd waiting to board the tram - waited for approximately 1.5 hours before we boarded the fucking tram. What took them so long ? Well, it appears that the entire space center tram schedule was operated by a bunch of prepubescents - aged 12 to 15 (summer job or something). Hell, they’re so screwed up, that it took them 20 minutes just to get the passengers into the tram, coz they could not figure out if some of the passengers suppose to sit here and there. Tonnes of bullshit. It’s kinda ironic to know that a supposedly high tech space center (in the world) was actually operated by a bunch of imbecile kids …. how thought provoking.
And then, when we finally got on the tram, guess what the tram brought us to ? To tour the carpark of a few old and dilapidated buildings. “That’s building one fifty nine … it fucking does this .. and that”. And that’s basically about it. No exhibits. Well, there’re a few model space shuttle inside a fake hangar for us to photograph on (see previous entry). But those are pretty much plastics and rubber stuffs. They’re not real. What a disappointment.

So, that’s how I spent my day in Houston. We drove (i drove) straight home right after the space center visit. The place is crap. If you happened to get a chance to visit the space center in Houston ? Don’t go. It’s not worth it.

*long entry

Went to Houston on Day 6 with a bunch of asian colleagues (incl. cheecheongfun). It was located almost 200 miles south east of Austin, and was about 4 hours drive from here. Here are some photos for you guys to dig.

rented a car in Houston. I’ve always preferred a black car, but they’ve all ran out of black car, so I had no choice but to rent a white one. I tried to bitch but, the car rental codger told me to take it or leave it.

the car rental guy asked if i wanted to upgrade the rental car to a turbo version - which boasts an extra 20,000 horsepower - for an extra payment of 200 bucks per day. I was like “what !?”. “What” for - what a rip off ! I declined the offer.

he then took a second desperate attempt to ask me if I wanted my car to be upgraded to a convertible version for just 50 bucks per day. Well, this time, I just gave him a cold reply - “only if … the car’s black” and walked off.

the white car didn’t do good for me. The controls are flimsy and way too complex to operate. I had a lot of trouble to even turn on the fucking a/c.

we got ourselves a nice inn which boasted a big carpark. And boy .. tour buses in Houston are unbelievably huge. That’s probably because a lot of Texans have weight problems.

this was the reception of the one-of-a-kind inn that we lodged. The guy was a friendly lad. Had a strong Texan accent and always sported with a yo momma joke. “Yo momma’s so ugly that she’s gonna kill all the fishes when she jumps into the ocean”. That wasn’t really funny but, I pretended to laugh anyway.

the inn even had a big indoor playground for fat Texan kids. It’s kinda awesome

with a king sized bed, the room also came with a big closet, which was kinda neat.

and a big fridge too. This one, you can stuff approximately 200 mother-in-laws inside and still left you enough space to store 1 year worth of pork chops.

it has this nice little window that overlooks the inn’s park. I sure would have hoped to catch some view of naked chicks getting some tan down there. But there ain’t no beach around that inn.

taking a dump was never more comfortable than this. The rim had a layer of cushion for extra comfort and protection from bacterias that may cause zits on your butt cheeks.

the place’s safe too. The guests won’t have to worry about electrical shorts that might cause fire - that’s because they have a really big circuit breaker just outside the room.

I then took a walk around the park and saw the lawnmower guy. I tried to greet but, he was way too busy mowing the lawn with his lawnmower machine.

saw some exotic Houston aborigin lizard during my walk. According to the locals, this lizard is known to have a weird preference of humping tree trunks during the night.

Well, that’s about it. My trip to Houston.

Alright, I finally managed to muster some strength to post some pics. Page may load slow due to larger page size than usual text blog. If you have a 56K modem and your speed is crawling, well, that means it’s time for you to get a broadband. My blog is not 56K connection speed friendly …

Will update day 6 tomorrow. I need more sleep and rest.

*weekend schedule will be full. Posts will be on journal mode to make it shorter. If it doesn’t make sense, well, live with it. Photos will be posted up separately once I manage to shake off the feeling of lazy to do things.

Friday. American takes Friday real seriously. They think it’s serious to take things lightly on Friday. That’s why, those guys decided to bring me (and cheecheongfun) out for a barbeque lunch.

Place ? It was located at the outskirts of Pflugerville (or was it inside Pflugerville ?) which requires approximately, 30 minutes’ drive. There were 7 of us so, we’re divided into 2 vehicles. A group of 3 on Jose’s (one of the lab techs) truck and 4 of us on Keith’s (the 300 pound dude) truck.

Jose was driving a Chevrolet Suburban and Keith’s was a Ford Excursion. Keith’s truck was so big that Roberto Carlos would need a ladder to climb onto his truck. Spotted with a V8 turbocharged engine and 400 over horsepower, the thing was nasty.

But it wasn’t for long. After Keith tore up the road for approximately 4 - 5 miles, we began to feel something funny going on. His truck was wobbling a little. Keith then got down and confirmed that it was a puncture. That’s very lucky indeed. Well, he then took out his big crank (not sure if it’s called that..) and Dave attempted to change the tire. But .. they don’t fit. Keith kinda like forgotten that he got a set of customized nuts (the nuts on the wheels..) and the crank was original. So, the guys figured that they’re gonna call up somebody for help.

Keith then whipped out his cell phone - but his display was dead (happened on the previous night).. and he couldn’t remember anyone’s phone number either. That means, we’re stranded in the middle of a lonely farmland country road with no apparent signs of help. Keith tried desperately trie to dial out through his cellphone without a display … but he kept getting to the wrong person.

It wasn’t looking good for us until help came along. There’s a big dude driving by with another truck, and he happened to own a hydraulic jack and a fitting crank. And so, Keith used the guy’s help as we got lifted by Jose to the barbeque restaurant. Dave said, if there’s any dude over 300 pounds driving a truck around the area, there’s a high chance that Keith knew them. Dave was right.

The barbeque restaurant happened to be an old rundown shack. Apparently, the shack was aged over a decade and looked exactly like a scene in the wild west era. According to the guys, the waitress (which’s also the owner’s grand-daughter), was one of the sideline actress in the movie Texas Chainsaw Massacre (latest version). Seen the movie but never recalled seeing her before .. but, not that it matters anyway.

The thing that matters is the food. The barbeque. It was fat, greasy and lots of them. It was fantastic. Served with pickles and jalapeno peppers, it was simply awesome. Was one of the most memorable lunch I ever had in US.

Dinner time, was invited by Jose to join his family and friends at a new Mexican restaurant in town. Food was mediocre - had plenty of good fajitas. But the most standout thing about this new Mexican restaurant are the free margaritas (and free flow too) and also a fantastic band of El Mariachis. Made it back to hotel at about 10pm.

Next plan - to go to Houston on Day Six (Saturday Austin time).

Everyone in the lab started to feel kinda light today after it was past 4pm. Some even packed their stuffs up and went home. That was about the time I made my move - I asked those guys about places that I can get either a really good Mexican food, or steaks that would make me squeal “wooooo!”.

Well, my queries kinda psyched the guys up and they suggested so many places … that I couldn’t finish it on a parchment of scrap paper. After much contemplation, I made up my mind to dine at a place called Saltgrass. It’s a few miles down the freeway, and according to the guys, it should worth every single drop of gas to drive there.

But before that, I asked Jase about steaks. Coz I know nothing about steaks. It went like this

Me : “So Jase, which type of steak you’d normally prefer ? I’m lost here.”

Jase : “I don’t know man. It depends. But porterhouse is pretty cool.”

Me : “What about the best one ?”

Jase : “Maybe we can ask John for that”.
[John is the lab manager that sits far back at the lab]

Jase : [shouts to the back] “Hey John ! Which steak do you prefer ?”

John : “What ?”

Jase : “Which steak you’d normally prefer ?”

John : “Texas !”

Jase : “No man… steak … Mike’s asking for some suggestion for a good steak”

John : “I thought you said STATE !”

John suggested a T-bone. But I hate T-bone coz I’m always finding a lot of trouble cutting those meat off the bone.

Anyway, we arrived at Saltgrass quite early. Around 6 pm. Was there earlier to avoid crowds. It was a reputable place of having to wait for hours just to get a seat. So, I’ll have to opt for an earlier dinner.

I got myself a good order but cheecheongfun faced some problem when the waitress asked him how he’d like his steak cooked. He was puzzled and was looking at me. Obviously, an SOS sign from him that he fucking need help. So, I was kinda like telling him in broken mandarin that how he’d like his “cow” cooked. He told me he’d like it to be 75% cooked.

For a moment there, I mistakenly thought that he’d like it 75% raw (that’s because his accent is pretty much fucked … and my mandarin’s not even up to par to a nursery level). And so, I told the waitress “My friend here would like his steak Medium Rare”. That’s totally opposite what cheecheongfun wanted.

I did not realize the blunder until he told me that he do not like his food raw (which he also took the trouble to explain that’s why he don’t like to eat salad - as if I care). That’s when, I suddenly went - oh fuck !- realizing that I have ordered the wrong stuff for him.

I then took the initiative to tell him that nobody eats their steak fully done. I told him that cool people (like me) always eat it at least half rare … coz they’re far more juicier that way (I’m convincing him as if I know a lot about steaks like knowing my own mother). He kinda dig my explanation .. and so, I finally revealed to him that I purposely ordered a ‘medium done’ steak for him - let him experience something new. Of course I lied.

Guess what happened ? He actually enjoyed it. He told me it’s somehow different and it’s good. But I don’t know if he’s lying coz - I swear that I actually saw him gave out an irked look when he saw blood oozing out from his medium rare piece of steak. *shrugs*.

Dining with him was never easy. As I’ve said, this guy’s eating like a supersonic jet engine … but then, luckily, it was a noisy place and I enjoyed most of my meal peacefully (despite the disturbing view of seeing cheecheongfun poking at that half cooked bloody piece of steak).

And when we’re on our way back driving, he actually bitched about having to pay the sales tax. That’s when I got pissed and I lectured him in broken mandarin that
- there are taxes everywhere. The government needs money to build roads, schools and supply electricity to all homes so that we can watch porn at home. They also need money for the army. Weapons, tanks and shits. If there weren’t any taxes around, his country would have to go to war by just throwing stones … and that is - if there are soldiers willing to fight on their own expense.

He gave a good thinking about it and finally gave me a nod of approval - which I’m kinda surprised that he’s actually able to decipher my really beautiful mandarin. Signs of improvement.