Emily’s blood test revealed she has SLE. A chronic disease that affects the skin and some body organs.

Might affect the kid. She was advised to abort the baby if it’s getting worse, which we’ll only get to know next week.

I just do not know what to think or how to react. If your god is listening, please pray for her and the baby.

*****

Update: I would like to thank those of you out there who would unselfishly and altruisticly prayed for me and my family. Appreciated that.

But then, I’ve always wanted to say this. Just, if you’re really praying for me, I would humbly ask you to do it within your thoughts. Please do not announce to the world that “something bad” has befallen to me and my family. We’re actually on the road to recovery - it’s a positive thing. Not that we’re gonna die or something like that. I hope you would understand.

Recently, I’ve been getting some unprecedented visitors as well - and those visitors, had been sending me nasty mails cursing not only me, but my family members - which somehow, was involved because of their hatred towards my blog. It’s a mail with a content that was wild beyond a civilized mind would think of. Something that makes them no different than a deranged psycho that goes around mutilating children without mercy. I’ll save the details for decency’s sake.

I fully understand that the mail was intended to inflict full damage on my faith and feelings. But then, it didn’t. Instead, I felt disturbed that there is such sick individual in our society.

Well, sorry to disappoint you, psycho. My whole family’s doing way better than you had hoped for. I managed to find out about the cybercafe which you’ve sent the mail from (time, location as well), but do not worry. I won’t be banging your head next - coz I know, if you already have a sick mind like this, it’s the matter of time before you’re gonna ruin your own shit. You won’t get far in your life.

Just remember what you’ve mailed to me, and one day, when you set up your own family, think about it again. I hope you’re not a person who believes in karma.

There’s something I would like to announce that would change the course of many young inquisitive pretty girls out there …

I initially thought of keeping the news esoteric, but because I am so affined to my blog like that, and couldn’t contain my elation about it, I decided to share the joy to the world.

I would like to announce that, Emily and I had upgraded our love to a brand new level…

We’ve been bestowed with a gift. Of flesh, blood and DNA. Yes, there’s a kid inside Emily’s womb now, feeding on her placenta. (and I’m amazed that my reproductive system actually worked !) Wheeeee !

We only discovered that during Emily’s ail-stricken days a couple weeks ago. The doctor insisted her to take a pregnancy test when her taiyeema (a Cantonese slang for PMS) didn’t flush out on time. And that’s how we found out she’s knocked up.

Well, the child is now only 4 - 5 weeks old (still swimming), and was too tiny to be seen yet. The next checkup is 2 more weeks away, and we’ll only be getting a full glimpse on how he/she’s doing by then. Hope everything’s fine. *fingers crossed*

So there you have it. Me getting a level up. Promoted to CEO. Leaving behind my cocoon of adolescence and start to embrace the dark force mob of paternity. It’s the aurora of the next chapter of my life.

I promise to the world, if I were to be given a healthy baby (boy or girl, doesn’t matter), I will ensure that he/she doesn’t :

- glide around with a pair of heely shoes.
- scamper and yell like a lunatic inside a hospital ward.
- wail like no tomorrow inside a cinema
- pull a girl’s hair/skirt (if he’s a boy)
- pull a boy’s kukucheow (if she’s a girl)
- study in the same university that Panda went.
- bite my neighbour’s annoying daughter too hard

So much to think. So much anticipation. So much questions. So nervous.

The death of my paternal grandfather a year ago has caused great sorrow to my grandma. For the first time in her life, she was left all alone by herself. Then .. as if it’s not bad enough, her favourite son (my father..) passed away 5 months later …. and she went into deep depression ever since.

So deep .. that she can’t even remember what she had eaten 5 minutes ago. Her memory was limited to only remembering the people she love … (i’m grateful that i’m one of them)

She has insomnia everyday… isolated herself, and almost at the brink of getting demented. It was a suffering that words can’t describe …

Yesterday, she decided to leave us for good. She ended her suffering after going into a deep sleep … to reunite with both her favourite son … and her beloved husband in afterlife.

There will be no blog entry for today as a token respect for my demised grandmother.

I was asked by my mom to bring grandpa for dinner last Friday. Not a problem for me as I was quite free that night so, I happily obliged.

We (Emily and I) decided to buy him to something nice. But before that, I had to get past the first obstacle when dealing with my senile grandfather - to convince the old man that I am not some crook trying to abduct him. You see, he’s already 90. He has some serious hearing problems and he couldn’t remember how many kids he has, let alone grandkids. So, you can imagine how it was for me.

Grandpa : *smile*

Me : “HI GRANDPA. IT’S ME… MICHAEL” [I had to speak very very loud because of his hearing problem]

Grandpa : “WHAT?” [He is loud because he could hardly hear himself talking]

Me : “IT’S ME… MICHAEL. I WILL BE IN CHARGE OF YOUR DINNER TONIGHT. I BOUGHT YOU SOMETHING NICE.” *wink*

Grandpa : “OH… YOU BROUGHT ME DINNER. HOW NICE OF YOU, whoever you are.”

Me : “YEAH. MOM HAD A FALL AND HURT HERSELF PRETTY BAD ON THE CHIN. SHE COULDN’T COME TONIGHT SO SHE SENT ME” *smile*

Grandpa : “YOUR MOM… DO I KNOW YOUR MOM?”

Me : “MY MOM IS YOUR DAUGHTER, GRANDPA. HER NAME’S KAREN.”

Grandpa : “OH MY, IS SHE OK? WHERE IS SHE NOW?”

Me : “SHE’S FINE. JUST A SMALL BRUISE AND NOW RECUPERATING AT MY SISTER’S HOME”

Grandpa : “SHE’S AT HOME?”

Me : “NO, MY SISTER’S HOME”

Grandpa :”WHERE IS THAT PLACE?”

Me : “JUST A FEW STREETS AWAY, RIGHT OVER THERE, REMEMBER?”

Grandpa : “OH YEAH I REMEMBER. SO, YOUR MOM’S FINE?”

Me : “YES, SHE IS. SHE JUST WANTED TO STAY OVER FOR A FEW DAYS AND THEN SHE’LL BE BACK TO MY PLACE.”

Grandpa : “AND WHERE DO YOU LIVE?”

Me : “I LIVE IN [location], DO YOU REMEMBER?”

Grandpa : *puzzled look*

Me : “THE PLACE NEAR THE UNIVERSITY, REMEMBER?”

Grandpa : “OHH, THAT NEW APARTMENT. I REMEMBER NOW. SO, YOU MUST BE KAREN’S SON?”

Me : “THAT’S WHAT I TOLD YOU, GRANDPA. YES I AM.” *wink*

Grandpa : *smacks head* “AHAKS! FORGIVE ME, AS I AM A VERY OLD MAN NOW… MY MEMORY IS FAILING. I MAY EVEN HAVE A BRAIN DAMAGE, HAHAHHH”

Me : “YOU’RE JUST FINE, GRANDPA. AT LEAST YOU REMEMBER ME NOW, RIGHT?”

Grandpa : “HAHAH, AND WOW, YOU’VE GROWN UP TO SUCH A GOOD LOOKING MAN NOW. THAT’S WHY I CAN’T RECOGNIZE YOU…” [note: I did not make this up]

Me : “NAAAAW GRANDPA, I ALWAYS LOOKED GOOD, HAHAH”

Grandpa : “HAHAH RIGHT RIGHT. SO WHERE’S YOUR MOM?”

Me : *feet in the air*

The process would repeat for countless of cycles. And I had to answer him the same thing over and over again.

But then, ironically, my grandfather isn’t as forgetful as he always claimed to be. I think he’s just feigning it. You know why? It’s because after our dinner, he started to tell us stories about his heydays… about how he endured his hardship when he was at my age. Bla bla bla. And those events took place like, over 60 years ago… If you ask me, I would say that old dude have a better memory than I do.

Anyway, that Friday night’s experience was a pleasant one. And I am glad that my grandfather enjoyed the evening telling us stories.

A discussion with a bunch of colleagues made me realize one thing about myself - I never actually owned a pet in my life before. Not a dog, a cat… nor even a hamster. There are occasionally lizards visiting me at night, but I am not responsible for their upbringing at all. I never owned any cute little tortoises or even a guppy before. The closest thing to a pet I ever had, was a bunch of nasty monsters in that addictive Dungeon Keeper game - but they were just codes and they do not exist in reality. So, no pets at all.

Never had I thought of taking up the responsibility to own a life before. Not that I hate animals or anything, in fact, I actually like dogs. But I never get to own, or thought of owning one before… because I have been staying in apartments most of my life. It would have been inconvenient to own a pet of any sorts. Inconveniences like space constraint, hygiene, noise control, fall from the apartment when they hang their clothes, getting stuck inside elevators when they return home late at night, troubles with security guards (u know, they have difficulty to talk), not enough parking space, etc.

But then, even if I have the capacity, I probably would digress at the idea. I don’t really know why. Maybe it is because I am afraid that I might not do a good job taking care of them - for I am already having a lot of trouble looking after myself. Or maybe I am too afraid of losing my pet when it dies. To name a few.

With all the difficulties and hurdles, I guess I will not be thinking of keeping a pet for a very long time. At least not until I move to a landed property, which would cost at least half a million in Penang. And if I have that much amount of money - I would be too busy enjoying myself to be worried about pets. *shrugs* One way or another, it’s rather unlikely.