To those of you who,

1) is reading this entry,
- Merry “5-minutes-orgasm” Christmas.

2) has been reading this blog since last Christmas,
- Merry “10-minutes-orgasm” Christmas.

3) has been reading this blog since last 2 Christmas,
- Merry “15-minutes-orgasm” Christmas.

2) has been reading this blog since it started,
- Merry “20-minutes-orgasm” Christmas.

3) has been reading this blog every awakening minute of your life,
- You don’t need Christmas, you need to put your head in the toilet bowl and flush.

Remember your loved ones. Don’t drink and drive. (Just crash at the party.)

Suria KLCC, Kuala Lumpur 2004. Canon Ixus500

Merry Christmas to all the living creatures on Earth and from the galaxies beyond.

One of our BODs (Board of Directors), Ricky, will be tying a knot with his girl in December. Which means, he’ll lose the following

1) his bachelorship
2) his freedom to have sex secara rambang
3) his financial flexibility
4) his commitment to the board (party, guy stuffs)

In view of his upcoming big bummer, the board decided to hold a bachelor’s party for him tomorrow night (also in conjunction to celebrate Deepavali like not a very sane person)

There’ll be plenty of booze, sex and barfing tomorrow… so, it’s gonna be wicked.

Ricky, I hereby, as the chairman of the board, in honor of your liver, spleen, pancreas and esophagus, would like to wish you, happy Deepavali. And congratulations. May you live happily ever after and have a lot of children with your wife. (because if you don’t, my children will outnumber yours and they’re gonna beat yours up, haha)

And my prayers are also with those of you who are getting married / got married this year.

In average, we have less than 80 christmas’ to celebrate… which, 1/4 of them were wasted when we’re prepubescent.

1/4 will be spent as a middle aged parent who worries about their kids.
1/4 will be spent in old age.

Hence, theoretically, we only have 1/4 of them left to celebrate.

That’s why you ought to spend your Christmas the best way you can.

Merry Christmas to all you sweet people out there.