Archive for the ‘3-of-us’ Category

September 13, 2006

break time

Emily and I were sitting by the side of Regine’s cot, both of us were patting and lulling her to sleep. But our precious little girl just won’t sleep. She wanted daddy to make funny faces to her. She wanted the tour around the house where she gets to meet interesting objects such as the spinning ceiling fan, those cute little magnet fishes at the fridge and hanging nappies that seem to wave at her every time she sets her eyes on them. She wanted everything, except sleep… and the time was approaching midnight. It was one of the craziest nights we’ve ever experienced in our life.

While trying to keep that rebellious little princess in control, Emily then turned to look at me and said, “It’s funny isn’t it? Who would have thought that one day, we’ll end up like this in life…”. All the fancy courtships, all the heart warming episodes, all the moanings… they all apexes to this very point of our life, becoming a slave to a round faced cute little miniscule girl who seems to have the supernatural ability to charm even the meanest crocodile in the universe…

With tears almost oozing out of my eyebag rims (which developed over recent sleep deprivation), I nodded to Emily slowly, as if we’re 2 anguished prison inmates repenting our sins… It was an emotional moment. You know, THE moment. When things are silent and you’re mentally seeking asylum from the chaotic world. It lasted for only a couple minutes, and then it was cut off by a yelp from Regine, a sign that our break’s over and we went back to work as somebody’s parents.

I missed my life very much.

michaelooi  | 3-of-us  | 24 Comments
August 19, 2006

daylight robbery

Emily bought :
my socks – 3 pairs for 10 bucks (size: extra large, no strawberry stitch-ons)
Regine’s socks – 1 pair for 9 bucks (size: infant, with strawberry stitch-ons)

But it wouldn’t have looked as good on daddy’s feet, those damn expensive socks… even if they fit, anyway.

michaelooi  | 3-of-us  | Comments Off
August 8, 2006

babies are weird people

I was reading some mails on my PC when all of a sudden, Regine wailed out loud inside mom’s room. Earlier, mom had brought her into the room for some tummy massage (to rid of her intestinal gas). It was all going well until she started to wail unprovoked. I stormed into the room

“Mom what happened??”
“I don’t know, she just set off like that.”

She never wailed like this before. It sounded very unusual. It was as if she has just witnessed her beloved pet dog explode or something like that. It really got the whole house in the state of pandemonium there. I came up with the idea that she might have been bitten by one of those nasty bugs, and so the three of us (Emily, mom and myself) frisked all over Regine’s corrugated layers of baby fat to spot for a bite rash or just anything that might hurt her.


Her wailing went louder. We were getting edgy by the seconds as none of us could figure out what was wrong with her. We tried everything – pacifier, lulling, cuddling, they all didn’t work. Just then, my mom took her out from the room and went for a walk, only then… she started to calm down.

I was like “What the fuck? What was wrong with mom’s room?”. I tried to check around for anything that might have provoked the baby, you know, maybe a very odd looking old people bra that might have irked her or something… but there wasn’t any. There’s nothing wrong with mom’s room except that stupid fengshui crystal. So, what provoked Regine that night? Could it be something that’s paranormal (after all, it’s the hungry ghost festival month…)? Perhaps my Regine saw something that we didn’t?


It was all forgotten until the next day when she was brought into mom’s room again for more tummy massage (oh yeah). Guess what? She wailed again. I wasn’t there because I was at work. But Emily told me it was the same kind of wail like the night before. Knowing that it had got to be something in the goddamn room that was upsetting the baby, Emily brought her out of it and mom combed through her room to investigate, what exactly was the problem. And finally, she found it.

It was the hairdryer.

Strange, but true. You see, part of the traditional baby tummy massage procedure was to rub oil (somekind of lemon grass oil I think) with both your palms until it is warm, then you tenderly apply it on the baby’s tummy. But my mom, being an inherent smart lazy fart, found an easier way out of this – to use the hairdryer to warm up the oil on her palms instead of laboriously rubbing it. It was all good until that tumultuous Sunday night, when out of the blues, my Regine suddenly developed a fear of hairdryers. The big bad evil fucking hairdryer.

She should feel grateful that she wasn’t born in the 70’s. Coz if she did, she could have been an outcast in her teenage life in the 80’s… back when hairdryers used to be the ‘in’ thing… That lucky little shit.

Babies are weird people.

Btw, anyone of you know of the phobia word used to describe the ‘fear of hairdryers’?

michaelooi  | 3-of-us  | 21 Comments
August 3, 2006

it’s getting harder

Mom was changing Regine’s diaper, when she accidentally knocked over the bowl of cotton wipes, spilling water all over the floor.

Mom : “Fuck!”

Yes, my mom cusses. A lot.

Me : “Mom!! You shouldn’t use that kind of language in front of Regine! Kanneh!”

I guess we’re still not used to the fact that there’s now a kid looking up to us as role models around the house. This has got to stop, man.

I don’t really care if my little girl’s going to learn those expletives later in her adult life. It’s just, I want her first spoken word to be something worth remembering, something beautiful, like maybe –

“daddy/mommy you’re the greatest person on Earth”

or perhaps

“daddy/mommy don’t worry I’ll repay back the money you spent on my insurance, healthcare and milk powder when I grow up someday, then i’m gonna buy both of you a villa, and an all year round expense to travel all over the world”.

or simply,

“Michael, Emily, you rawk!”

Not “Fuck”, “Cheebye” or anything the like of it… It’ll be disastrous. Hell.

I think I may need to abstain from cussing from now on, at least until she’s old enough to differentiate between right and wrong…

Do you people cuss in front of your kids? BEHIND your kids? Do you people even cuss at all? (email me if you want to answer that)
Oh god. It’s getting harder to be a parent.

michaelooi  | 3-of-us  | Comments Off
July 23, 2006

a star is born

I had just finished my lunch, and Regine just finished her milk. I was sitting in front of the TV trying my best to impersonate a radish plant, while Regine was in her mother’s arm, having her back patted …

Emily : “Burp, Regine, burp”

Me : [BURPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!] “Hheeehehh!!”

Wrong call.

It was a badasss belch seethed from the concoction of stewed sour vegetable soup and oyster sauce barbecue pork that I had just eaten, and was loud enough to produce its own aftershocks. Emily threw me a look of disdain, probably reflecting the ill prospects of having her daughter to grow up with someone like me in the house. Just about then, we were both startled by another sound


A good learner she is, I could see. Beginning to love her more by the seconds, I am.

Emily : [feet up in the air]

michaelooi  | 3-of-us  | Comments Off