Archive for the ‘3-of-us’ Category

August 1, 2018

keke challenge

I had to do a school run one morning for my daughter Regine. This is usually done by my wife, Emily, because I have many early morning meetings. Fuck of a job, I know. Anyway, as expected, I got stuck in a jam that inches towards the school gate that morning. I looked at Regine in my rear view mirror, she was looking outside the car, watching the world went by.

Me:: “You know what’s a ‘keke challenge’, right?”

She beamed me a smile and said,

Regine:: “Yeah, hahah!”

To those of you who lives in caves and have not heard of the ‘keke challenge’, it’s a man-made phenomenon that cashes out years of accumulation of stupid people who have survived the process of natural selection either from means of technological advantage or sheer dumb luck. The challenge is real simple – just film yourself jump out of your moving car, and do a dance along the moving car… and post the feat in your favorite social media. Stupid people will find this challenge irresistible (you should be seeing this all over YouTube now of people getting their shit ruined by attempting the dangerous challenge). That’s why I had to find out if my daughter has to be put to sleep or something…

Me:: “So I’m gonna go real slow in front of the school here, and you can do a ‘keke challenge’ in front of your friends… how about that?”

Regine:: “You crazy?? I’m not dumb, ok?”

Me:: “Worst case, you’d roll on the pavement a few times, but you’d look good doing it. But if you succeed, you’ll be full of style.”

Regine:: “Nice try.”

I guess she passed the test then. She’s going to survive this world.

michaelooi  | 3-of-us  | Comments Off
September 15, 2017

how to appreciate your father

My 11 year old daughter Regine came to me about something in her BeeEm homework, I was busy reading a book on the bed.

Regine: “Daddy, what are the examples of ‘menghargai jasa ayah’?”

‘Menghargai jasa ayah’ means to show appreciation for your father’s contribution.

Me: “You can give him a hug… or maybe a gift…”

Regine: “What other examples? I need more examples”

Me: “Leave him alone…”

She got the message and left me alone. I knew she’s a smart one.

michaelooi  | 3-of-us, dialogs  | Comments Off
July 25, 2017

first spam from my daughter

Gave Regine her own phone some time back, and she spammed me for the first time…

michaelooi  | 3-of-us, e-chats  | Comments Off
April 22, 2017

saving for it

One of the hardest thing about being a parent is to teach your kid about prudence and how to appreciate the little things we buy with our own money. Kids generally don’t care about money. The value of money is absent from their day to day cluster of thoughts, and that makes it even harder to teach them about being prudent or such shit.

My daughter Regine is no different from any other regular kid. She takes things for granted because we have been giving her the best, and would desire expensive glitzy things that her classmates had been showing off at school. One of the things that she sorely desired was that one ‘Smiggle’ pencil case. Now, if you’ve not heard of the brand, it’s like what a ‘Coach’ is… when compared to a regular handbag. Same shit, same design, but costs like 10x more than any other regular brand. Only that ‘Smiggle’ is all about school accessories (stationery, bags, tumblers, etc) and they’re targeted at kids.

So this goddamn piece of ‘Smiggle’ case costs about RM 104 bucks or something like that. I almost had a cardiac arrest when Regine told me the price. When I was in my secondary years, I used a metal pencil case which I bought for only 2 bucks, and I used it until I completed my engineering, and it’s still here today!

Read the rest of this entry »

michaelooi  | 3-of-us  | Comments Off
February 1, 2016

titties

I was hanging out with both my wife and daughter at the bedroom, swiping something on the phone, when I heard my daughter ask:

Regine: “Mommy, what is ‘titties’?”

Before my wife could answer, I was already laughing like a jackass, while wondering where the hell could she have heard such words being used in school. Must be one of the goddamn TV shows. Anyways, it was funny in a way it was being asked, so I laughed.

Regine: “Why are you laughing daddy?”

I wanted to tell her that ‘titties’ is another slang to describe ‘boobies’, which itself is also a slang, but I just couldn’t think of a way to do it with no harm done. That was when my wife remarked:

Emily: “He’s laughing because he must have thought of something dirty…”

Me: “Eh?”

I later found out that my daughter wanted to know what does ‘titis’ mean in BeeEm (which means ‘drip’), not ‘titties’ in English. It was fortunate I didn’t take the trouble to describe what are ‘titties’ to her…

michaelooi  | 3-of-us  | Comments Off