Who are you?
The name’s Michael Ooi. Note that my family name’s Ooi.

How old are you?
Old enough to bang your girlfriend/wife/mom.

What do you work as?
I am an engineer in a multi-national company known anonymously as ‘Company X’ ‘Company Y’ ‘Company T’.

Why do you blog?
Because I can.

Are you normally like this in real life? To be so ribald and direct?
No I’m not.

I like your blog. Can we exchange links?
If you want to exchange links, link me first and I’ll consider to reciprocate IF, I don’t find anything wrong with your site.
No we can’t. I don’t maintain the ‘links’ page anymore. You can still add me if you want.

Why have you stopped maintaining your ‘links’ page?
Because you’re ugly.

How frequent do you blog?
I blog when I feel like doing it. Just check back frequently or you can subscribe to my feed.

How do I subscribe to your feed?
Unplug your computer mouse and swallow it whole.

I like your entry #xxxxxx. I would like to plagiarize your entry and post it in my blog/site to pimp your ideas.
Email me, we’ll talk.

Where can I find your email address?
Just bang your head against the wall, the address will be revealed to you on this screen. Repeat if it doesn’t work.

I disagree with your post about [something] in your entry #xxxxxx. I think you’re wrong and […]
Deal with it.

I would like to offer you a deal to make money with your blog through […]
Not interested.

I think you’re awesome, and I would like to invite you to guest blog/write for […]

You fucking plagiarized something from me/other losers, you cocksucking asshole [bitch bitch bitch]
I never plagiarize. Shut up and die.

I hate you and your blog. You’re a shame to the society, you have atrocious grammar and ought to be hung. etc.
Well, fuck you. Just fucking leave and never come back you moronic androgynous specimen.