August 28, 2019

nut-shot

You know sometimes how our sock would get balled up from the laundry? Instead of putting my hand into it to loose it out, I do the flick maneuver. You know, flick the sock until it unravel itself. I’ve been doing this since the beginning of time, and never had a problem until the other day. For some reason that day, the sock just wouldn’t unravel even after a few flicking. So I flicked harder, and the centrifugal force made it balled up tight, and it became like an elastic flail weapon.

I was seated on the sofa when I was doing that, and during one of its out of control elastic flailing, the ball of sock ended up hitting my right nut. Now, I’ve never been hit in the nut that hard before. I’ve been hit in the nut with a soccer ball back in the school days, but it wasn’t anything like this. I reckoned that most of the force were absorbed by my hip or something. But this? This was a direct hit. Ball of sock of about the size of my own ball, came into direct contact with my right nut. I had no idea it was that bad. The next few minutes, I had to lie down on the floor, paralyzed in agony. The feeling was like a really bad stomach ache after a bad case a food poisoning, and I almost puked on the floor. I bet if there’s a hyena nearby, I couldn’t even get up to run for my life. I’d have been eaten alive right there and then.

Fucking nuts. I don’t think Archilles was hit in the heel, it must have been his nut. Our nuts are our weakest point, that’s for sure. I’ll never flail a ball of sock near my nuts ever again.

michaelooi  | experiences  | 

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