Archive for 2018

July 21, 2018

black shoes for school children

It is in the news today. The new government’s Ministry of Education came up with the idea of implementing black shoes for the school children. One of the primary reasons cited? Easier to maintain. *facepalm* Here’s one of the news snippet:

[source]
Students to wear black trainers next year, says Dr Maszlee
SHAH ALAM: Next year, school students will step out in black shoes instead of in white.

According to Education Minis­ter Dr Maszlee Malik, the ruling is prompted by parents.

“The mothers especially, not so much the fathers,” he said during a question-and-answer session on education organised by Sinar Harian.

The packed session yesterday was moderated by journalist Tan Sri Johan Jaaffar.

Dr Maszlee was also asked what he wanted to achieve while at the helm of the ministry in the next five years.

“I want to ensure that children carry lighter bags to school and shorten the number of years students spend in school before furthering their studies,” he replied.

Dr Maszlee also said the ministry agreed with the Transport Ministry to sell special number plates to alumni of public universities as a form of additional funding for the institutions.

“Through a JPJ (Road Transport Department) collaboration with the universities, we will try to issue and sell number plates.

“For example, a graduate of UM (Universiti Malaya) may like to have the number plate UM1000 or UM2322.

“So they will pay JPJ, with half of the proceeds going to the university,” he said.

He urged the alumni to support their own universities.

“If the graduates and alumni don’t help their alma maters, who else will?”

Dr Maszlee also said he had assured the universities that their funding would not be cut but at the same time, there would be no guarantees of additional monies for them.

Meanwhile, Mydin managing director Datuk Ameer Ali Mydin asked if Dr Maszlee’s statement on black shoes for school students had been made after adequate consultation.

“I’m sure some mothers have complained but has he asked all the stakeholders, like parent-­teacher associations?”

Ameer noted that for generations, the practice of Malaysian students keeping their school shoes clean was a way of demonstrating personal hygiene, standards and discipline.

He added that parents would have to fork out money to buy new black shoes for their kids.

“School uniform sellers and shops with stocks of white school shoes will also be left holding the bag if the minister’s words become policy next year,” he said.

My question to Dr. Mercedes Benz here is – is that going to make your students smarter? If no, then why bother spending the unnecessary resources to implement & enforce this good-for-nothing ruling?

Our school shoes have been white for many decades, and maintaining them hasn’t been a problem, until these new generation of oxygen-wasting moronic parents whine about the school shoes being hard to maintain.

White school shoes and uniform are supposed to teach our children one thing – discipline. The discipline to groom oneself, by maintaining the cleanliness of one’s own uniform. The white color would make it easier to spot dirt/filth/stain, and harder for the students to be a sleaze. It looks cleaner and in some ways, make it safer for them as a pedestrian because it’s easier to spot in white.

Pakatan Harapan government is trying too hard to make popular decisions. Sometimes you got to think yourself. Don’t just listen to idiots. (there are many of them)

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July 11, 2018

football & loogie

I was wondering, with so many players spitting into the field during a football match, how much loogie actually ended up on the players’ head/hair?

You see, every time a camera pans to a player, you’re bound to see that fucker spit something onto the field. There are 22 players in a field, and I can assume that half of them do that all the time. Let’s assume, 2 spits every 1 minute (very conservative estimate, the number could be much much higher). So, during an entire match, 180 spits from 11 players (let’s not count the extra time, and also the linesmen/referee). That’s like, 1980 spits.

You divide that shit evenly across the area of the field, that’s like, a quarter spit in each meter square (a football field is 7140 square meters). But we all know there’s no such thing as a quarter spit so, let’s put it a 25% chance of hitting a spit at each square meter (I’m not sure if that’s how it worked out but, that’s my logic) when it is close to the end of the match. But because that’s a rolling ball, you can bet your ass that it is accumulative throughout the game (not mentioning, the stale spits left over from the past matches). Meaning, if a ball travels the distance it has to go in a match, every square meter has a 25% chance of coming in contact with some asswipe’s phlegm/loogie, when it is close to the end of the match (disregarding the past matches factor). And that shit gets rolled over to the next square meter, gets the same chance of contacting a loogie, repeated again, and again. The whole ball is definitely going to be full of slime by the end of the match, even if they change the ball regularly.

But anyway, it is bad enough to roll around for a few minutes on the field (those who fake injuries like Neymar, has a 100% chancee of getting in contact with someone’s loogie). You take the area of the head contacting the ball during a header, divide it with the total area of the football – you get the % of chance of a loogie getting into someone’s head/hair/face (I’m just too lazy to do the math) on every encounter.

So, what the fuck? If you don’t see the problem here, go google for Hepatitis C, B or Herpes. Players who spit into the field should be given a red card.

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July 3, 2018

15 fucking years old

This weblog has just fucking turned 15 years old. To you fucks who have no fucking idea how fucking long that is, here’s a fucking list to put things into fucking perspective:

– When I fucking started this weblog, I was only fucking 26 years old. I will be turning 41 this September. Fuck.
– I have fucking changed a total of 3 fucking cars since this weblog fucking started. The latest car I’m using now is 6 fucking years old. Fuck me.
– My daughter is fucking 12 now. I was still fucking bar hopping when the weblog started.
– My country has changed 4 fucking Prime Ministers since this weblog started. Madey, Pak Lah, Bijan and fucking Madey again.
– We were still fucking around with cathode ray tube televisions 15 fucking years ago.
– The word ‘tweet’ fucking meant nothing as a verb back when this weblog started because Twitter has not fucking existed yet.
– There were fucking no internet connectivity on phones 15 fucking years ago.
– Kill Bill was fucking launched the same year when this weblog started. I bet half of you fucking turds don’t know who Bill was (Bill’s dead).
– The Ronaldo we fucking had back then was a fucking Brazilian, not a fucking Portuguese.
– If you fucking started reading this weblog when you were fucking primary one, you’d have completed or about to fucking complete your tertiary education by now.
– Online shopping was largely unheard of 15 fucking years ago and laptops still fucking had floppy disk drives on them. (if you do not know what’s a fucking floppy disk, that’s your save button).
– Your mom wasn’t so fucking fat back then.

Proudly brought to you by the words ‘fuck’, ‘you’ and ‘me’.

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June 17, 2018

discipline your kids

I got into a sushi restaurant and took my seat. A short moment later, I heard this sharp squealing that originated from 2 tables away that sent out shock wave throughout the restaurant, triggering scorn from every patron inside the space. I looked over, and it was this little girl of no more than 4 years of age from a Malay family. The alpha male of the family, which I assume was the dad, was sitting beside this mad little fella. The dad had a full beard on him and he looked like someone you shouldn’t mess with. But despite that, the little girl were totally oblivious to that and went on screaming for a plate of sushi that she wanted on the conveyor. The dad, with a grim expression, complied her request and kid stopped screaming. This went on again and again, except for once when the dad decided that it was enough, to which the little girl went full scale meltdown. She spat stuff and started flailing her little arms, and screamed like she was possessed by an ancient demon from Sumeria. Dad of course caved, and again, gave her what she wanted (not sure because they were attracting a lot of attention, or simply because he was piss scared of his possessed daughter). It was an excruciating scene to see.

…which prompted me to notice – why do most Malay parents spoil their kids? I don’t see them spank their kids. I see shit like this all too many times. They let their children climb all over their heads, and they’d do nothing about it. When their children screamed at them, they’d relent to their way, and give them what they wanted. And I can tell that this has gone on since the old days (not just modern parents). I have many Malay friends, a lot of them had no authorities like what we Chinese/Indian kids had back in my time. The worst of the lot was a friend called Ariza. He lived 1 floor down from my old apartment. That guy screamed at his mom like she’s a slave to him. His dad was a burly and big guy, and Ariza screamed at his dad too. Occasionally when his mom go against his will, he’d go “PUKI PUNYA MAMA!! CIBAI PUNYA MAMA!!” – and half the block could hear him yelling that. The mama would look indifferent like a camel chewing cud and the dad would continue to read his newspapers. Ariza got what he wanted most of the time and he could come and leave anytime he wanted. If it was me, I’d have died because my mom would have beaten me to death.

And it’s not just about spanking your kids really. If one is ignorant/dumb enough to reach to the state of disrespecting his/her own parents, then it’s already quite late in the game. Like a advanced stage cancer. The parents would be considered a failure already. This has to be cultivated since the early age, teaching them about respecting the authorities and what are considered cardinal sins. I have never beaten my daughter before – not because I let her climb all over my head, but because I never have to. From an early age, we taught her what was acceptable and what was not, and it’s all psychological. In that kind of household, she automatically learned herself how things goes and got the gist of it. She’s never thrown a tantrum, never wailed like that banshee kid at the sushi restaurant and never gave us troubles in the cinema – because she knew those things would only get her more troubles (she just knew it). And now, when my daughter sees a scene like this, she could immediately relate and say “what was she thinking?”

But for me, it’s more like, what are the parents doing? Fucking discipline your kids already. Raise them up to be ‘berbudi bahasa‘ and ‘bertimbang rasa‘, not some spoilt kotek who goes around wrecking stuff when he/she doesn’t get what he/she wants. Teach them to reason. Spank them to let them know how to respect the authority. Do this instead of signing petitions or holding candle light vigils or breaking beer bottles in public. It all starts in the family. It’s better than you discipline them now than them learning it the hard way in the prison.

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June 3, 2018

drama minggu ini

I was driving out of the apartment compound to fetch my daughter from school with my wife. I reached the apartment boom gate which I was required to scan an electronic card to lift the gate and exit. But right in front of the scanner, were these 2 old Indian farts with a small fallen palm tree from a neighbor’s compound. One of them was an holding a hooked saw, and the other was holding the fallen tree (they both looked alike, I think they’re twins or brothers or something).

Because they’re blocking the whole way and I could not pass (and they did not seem to know that I was there), I let out a short honk, to let them know that ‘I’m here’. You know, a short honk, like a friendly honk. But instead of acknowledging that positively, the guy holding the saw started to get agitated and reacted by waving the saw at me menacingly. I didn’t provoke him further so, I just waited in the car for them to finish whatever the fuck that they’re doing. Then they proceeded to talk to each other about something (still holding the tree/saw) – like there’s a family matter between them (bad alcohol debt perhaps?) and that was when my wife remarked,

“What the hell are those guys doing there talking in the middle of the road? Why can’t they just drag the tree to the side?”
“I don’t know what’s wrong with them. Typical Indians. They wanted to look important, I guess.”

(I’m not a racist, please. I’m a misanthrope. I hate every fucking one all the same. Not just one race. Believe me).

The guy holding the hooked saw, saw us talking about them (the gesture gave it away), and again, we waved his saw at us.. like it is forbidden for us to have an opinion about him. And finally, after a couple moment’s worth of delay (waiting for these 2 old farts talking to each other in the middle of the road), they finally dragged the tree to the side and let me pass. When I reached the scanner area, agitated saw guy was standing next to my passenger window and was mouthing something at us with a grim expression. I rolled down the window to hear him clearly, and he said

“Lu tak boleh tunggu ka??” (in an angry manner).
[translation: “Can’t you just wait??”]

I don’t know what the fuck was that guy’s problem so I waited for him to finish what he got to say.

“Kita potong pokok, kalau itu pokok jatuh kena kereta kamu, macam mana??” (in an angry manner)
[translation: “We’re cutting down a tree. How would you like the tree to land on your car??”]

Fucking Indian antics again, being dramatic and all. One, the tree was already cut down and on the ground. He was full of shit there. Two, I did wait in the car, didn’t I? So why was he so damn pissed off about me waiting? Three, it was a fucking small palm tree, no bigger than a motorcycle. The guy was dragging it with 1 of his puny hands, that’s how small it was. I had to yell back at him for being such a bitch:

“Apasal lu marah-marah?? Saya tak marah lu marah apa?? Ambik pokok ke tepi lah!”
[translation: “Why are you so pissed off?? I should be the one who is pissed off! Just drag the tree to the side!”]

And my wife yelled at him as well “You mia pokok sudah potong lah!”
[translation: “You’ve already cut the tree!”]

He was taken aback. He probably thought we’re the kind of couple who’d let him castigate willingly because we’re supposed to be afraid of him. He tried to yell back but I wasn’t listening. I was prepared for a confrontation if he uses the saw on my car but eventually, he took a step back and walked the fuck away.

I really do not know why people like to complicate matters. All these could have been avoided and unnecessary. I get agitated easily too, yes, but this is a whole new level of hot headedness. Maybe it was the short honk that triggered him. Maybe that was the last thing he heard in his past life as a dog when a vehicle mowed him down into pieces, I don’t know. But as a grown up old fart, the guy could’ve been handled this way more calmly (I don’t expect professionalism), and amicably.

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