November 19, 2017

“Annabelle: Creation” (2017)

People have been talking about Annabelle for some time, like it’s the dopiest horror movie ever created (the demon doll only made a brief appearance in The Conjuring, and people have been hoping for a spin-off since then). So it finally came out in 2014, The Conjuring spin-off called “Annabelle”. I watched it with high expectations, but came out disappointed. It was boring and not scary at all. And perhaps that lowered my expectations a little when I laid my hands on the prequel to the 2014 Annabelle – named “Annabelle: Creation”. So this was supposed to tell how Annabelle originated and came to be such a defective product.

The plot was alright, wasn’t very creative, but fared fine to my lowered expectations. It all started with a couple who lost their daughter in a freak accident, and when they prayed for a chance to see their daughter again, they got more than what they asked for. Their weak in faith, paved way for a devil to manipulate their belief, and manifested itself as their daughter and asked for a permanent residence in Annabelle the doll (why would the devil need to ask? I wonder…) whom they welcomed in their everyday life like she was with them. Then one day, the mom accidentally saw the ‘daughter’s’ actual self through the reflection of the mirror, that it was actually the fucking devil itself! Freaked out, she tried to banish the devil with a lame ass wooden cross (bad idea), the devil clawed the shit out of the mom’s face and she became like Harvey-Norman-2-face-Batman-villain-lookalike. Shocked at how shit escalated so goddamn quick, the husband got some priests over, and contained the demon doll in a closet with some holy water and printouts of the Holy Bible (instead of say, burning the doll into obvlivion).

Things got a lot more calmer after that, and the couple soon came to terms with their daughter’s death. Then many years later, the couple offered shelter to a bunch of orphans, and that was when Annabelle got up to no good. It was like watching a high budgeted hide and seek game. Scary for the children, entertaining for the adults. (Oh, that Marilyn Manson lookalike Nun made an appearance in this movie too. I like that guy but, I don’t know how the hell he fitted in the story, it just didn’t make a lot of sense. It’s like you’re watching a family movie then suddenly BAM! Dick scene).

For some weak hearted people, this might be the ‘scariest movie they’ve ever watched’, but for me, I’d say it was below average as a horror movie. It was pretty lame for a devil’s standard to be able to just kill only a couple of people throughout the entire movie. There were a lot of senseless scaring, and very little violence. Some of the acts were non-value added and could’ve been done without. Had the devil used a wee bit of common sense, he’d have killed more children with less effort. In my book of evilness, the devil failed in his job (read more about my opinion about haunting here) and fared even lower than the humans. We need something stronger guys! This is lame!

4 out of 10 (ok plot, poor haunting, felt like a PG13 instead of R rated)

michaelooi  | movie reviews  | 

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