Archive for August, 2015

August 17, 2015


I was at McDonald’s. My daughter wanted a Happy Meal with Filet-O-Fish. So I ordered one.

Me: “Happy Meal with Filet-O-Fish”.

The guy at the counter with a lisp and heavy Malay accent, then asked me this…

Lispy guy: “Mehfis?”

Me: “I’m sorry, come again?”

Lispy guy: “Mehfis?” [smiles]

Me: “Errm, can you repeat that again?”

Lispy guy: “Mehfis. Mehfis?” [smiles]

Me: “You said ‘mehfis’?”

Lispy guy: “Yes, mehfis. Do you mean mehfis?”

Me: “I’m sorry bang, I tak faham apa tu mehfis. Boleh explain tak?” [translation: I’m sorry bro, I don’t know what is a ‘mehfis’, do you care to explain a bit?]

Then that fucker walked under the lighted display board menu, and pointed to an item called “McFish”. I then went:


Happy Meal doesn’t come with Filet-O-Fish anymore, it comes with McFish now. I have not heard of a McFish before, or know the difference between that thing and a Filet-O-Fish. The only fish burger I know is Filet-O-Fish. I didn’t make a fuss about it since they’re all the same crap anyway, so I okay-ed him to put a ‘Mehfis’ into my kid’s goddamn Happy Meal.

Later when my kid got her ‘Mehfis’, I kinda opened up the burger to check it out – it appears that the difference is only missing a dollop of tartar sauce or mayo, and some greens – it’s essentially just a shittier version of the already shitty Filet-O-Fish. Mehfis, ladies and gentlemen.

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August 10, 2015

Bersih 4.0

When I read about those cro-magnons wanting to organize another round of Bersih (dubbed as Bersih 4.0), I immediately went “OH NOT THIS FUCKING SHIT AGAIN!!”. (If you do not know what is ‘Bersih’, it’s a coalition of non-governmental groups that is infamous of organizing rallies to seek for cleaner election in Malaysia, or something like that).

No I’m not a BN supporter. I’m just as neutral as fuck. I just opined that this whole bullshit is just a goddamn waste of time/resources. Not only it does not work, it’s outright bad for everything – the economy, the environment and it breeds hooliganism. Each time a Bersih ‘rally’ (it’s more like a demonstration without a solid cause) is organized, you get mounts of garbage, destruction of properties and injured people along its path. Tonnes of greenhouse gases will be released to the atmosphere from the crippling traffic and other directly/indirectly linked causes, reversing the shit you treehuggers tried to achieve by switching off your lights during Earth Hour by millions of folds. So in an ironic sense, Bersih does what it thinks by reforming the electoral system for a ‘cleaner election’ (which is still unproven), but it pollutes basically everything else there is in the country.

Sure enough, one can argue that this is an individual’s right to express him/herself. But Bersih is not it because it is illegal. If it were to be done inside a stadium or a large piece of field, it would have been given a green light for a conditional permit and everyone would go home an accomplished citizen by having given the opportunity to express him/herself to the gnats and ants on the open field. And depending on how morally inclined they are, they’d pick up the garbage after the event and garner a praise or two for being so ‘steady’. But fuck no, these people wanted to take to the streets for more attention. How is that alright by a civilized standard? To march and demonstrate on the streets without permit is dangerous and opens up possibilities for things to get out of control (and let’s not even talk about those imbeciles who bring their children to the rally). And when that happens, you get water cannon-ed, tear gassed and truncheoned like a bunch of animals by the FRU riot police (and I root for the FRU, because they’re there to upkeep the peace). Then you’d see these attention seeking Bersih 4.0 whores posting selfies about police brutality seeking for empathy when they shouldn’t have gone against the law to illegally partake in the Bersih rally in the first place (so much for the attention). Know this, when you deliberately break the law, you’re no different and is as despicable as those Mat Rempits wreaking havoc in the society. If you feel that you’ve missed your prerogative as a concerned citizen to do something you’re not happy about the current ruling government, you can choose to post a goddamn black picture as your profile photo on your Facebook page – it’ll have the same effect as Bersih – NOTHING BUT A HOKUM.

It is not a solution to the problem. The current government, as corrupted as many claim it is, has deep roots down to the bedrock. A Bersih rally or a few, won’t undo everything in a fortnight. It takes much more than Bersih rallies to cure the chronic problem. If the decadence has taken so long to evolve to what it is today, my bet is it’ll take an even longer time to evolve back to the positive direction. If a much shorter route is preferred, then a revolution is the only way – but that is a route filled with death and destruction like what we’ve read in the history of the human world. And I don’t think I’m ready to go that route. I’d prefer the longer way. I’d start by voting the people I think is good for the job (for now) and I’d educate my child well. I’d teach her about responsibilities, how to be a considerate person, how to uphold her moral values and how to help the weak. She’d be a learned person with ample education provided through my sacrifice, and with her knowledge, she’d play a role/part to uphold the world in her generation (if she’s good enough, hopefully, she’d be a leader and will have the power to influence). If everyone does the same thing, I believe we’d see a better governance in the country in a generation or two. Takes time, but we’d get there.

P/S: That anti-Bersih group is worse. Those cretins are one of the many reasons I don’t like the BN government.

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