Archive for 2015

December 17, 2015

2015 roll up

At the end of 2014, I made a vow for to do all kinds of things. I hate to break this out but, I must be drunk at that time. I don’t even remember what I wrote until today (I was writing in 3rd person, wtf). None of those shit happened. No I didn’t fork out anything to renovate the fucking house. No I didn’t enroll myself in an MBA program. No I didn’t get a bike, or got my shit together either. I didn’t do jack shit in 2015.

2015 is not entirely fucked up but, it sure hell is boring. The pace of life at Company T has been slow as fuck as well. In my ex-Company Y, I was THE SHIT, running 8 – 9 portfolios, had 50 over reports in a week, had round the clock meetings, 10-minute lunches (with on-off food poisoning), multiple concurrent projects and I had to deal with terrorists. Time passed in warp speed. In Company T? It’s like a 900% regression of what I did at Company Y. That’s like switching from a illegal V8 street drifting race to a college USB-powered drone cum science fair. My time management skill is hardly needed and I had to deal with a lot of whiny pussies instead. Life literally is moving in slow motion for me in 2015 and I fucking hated every second of it.

That is probably the reason why I recently have gone back to gaming. It is the only way I could get my mind off on how shitty the year has been. That and tonnes of TV series I’ve been watching. I’d probably go back to more writing, but I have to see on that. I’d been planning on a long vacation somewhere in June 2016, might make it a yearly ritual. But for now, I’m going to just waste the remnants of 2015 away with more gaming and hope for a better 2016.

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December 11, 2015


Company T installed some fancy ass toilet seats in the loo recently…

On the right side of the seat, rests this plastic bar with 2 knobs labeled “family” and “feminine”.

Here’s the picture of the knobs:

Looks like the control for a goddamn massage chair…

I’ve seen these from the internet before. Very popular in Japan. What those knobs essentially do is shoot a jet of water to clean your ass or something (to save the loo user the energy-sapping chore of having to use a bidet). This is a non-electronic version, but those in Japan are mostly electronic, which has better capability I guess… like maybe dispense some warm air to dry your nuts or pneumatic tampon removal…

For the clueless blokes in Company T, this novelty of a gadget seemed to have piqued their interest enough to make them inadvertently wet themselves and the floor (evidenced by the wet booths – you can actually see the water beads all in the pic above). That’s a mistake. The idea is, your ass needs to be on the seat, otherwise the water will simply shoot out of the bowl unobstructed thus wetting everything in its path.

Anyway, the curiosity got to me too. But I was smarter than them rats, I sat my bare ass down on that bowl and tested the damn knobs. So what was the difference between “family” and “feminine”? It is just the angle, boys… just the angle. The “family” rubs the rim, the “feminine” shoots higher pressure at it. I don’t know why but, I guess it must be a sexual thing. (girls like anal).

michaelooi  | experiences, work shit  | Comments Off
December 1, 2015

animals like my house

I came home to this bizarre scene yesterday…

stucked cat
Is it a fucking garbage bag? A garbage bag with furry balls?

At first I thought someone prank-hung a garbage bag on my door, but upon a closer look, I realized it was fucking cat. Here’s an up close pic of that darn intruder…
Read the rest of this entry »

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November 26, 2015


Caught this in the news today…

Dude, That’s My Car!’ book pays homage to Perodua Myvi

KUALA LUMPUR: Get this! The bestselling model for Perodua has a book written about it.

Perodua is introducing its first book titled Dude. That’s My Car! which will be sold in major bookstores and Malaysian airports from today.

The book signals the conclusion to the Myvi’s 10th anniversary celebration this year.

Written by Perodua media relations head Ahmad Tamimi Omar, a former reporter, the 120-page book tells the story of the Myvi; the best-selling Perodua model with 870,000 units sold between May 2005 and October 2015.

It traces the Myvi origins and how it rose to become so well accepted by the Malaysian public.

“As a finale for the Myvi’s 10th birthday, we have decided to capture its history, present as well as a glimpse of its future in this book.” said Perodua president and CEO Datuk Aminar Rashid Salleh.

Perodua produced a total of 2,000 books and has collaborated with MPH Group Malaysia Sdn Bhd to distribute it in major bookshops nationwide. The book sells for RM29.90.

The Myvi 10th anniversary celebration began early this year with Perodua inviting members of the public to share their Myvi experiences in the “Love of the Nation” campaign.

The celebration reached its peak during the Myvi Gathering event in Shah Alam last May which saw the largest Myvi gathering of 2,613 cars joining the event. The gathering made it into the Malaysian Book of Records for the biggest car gathering in Malaysian history.

“During the celebration, we had invited the public to participate in many programmes and even introduced a special Myvi variant to commemorate this historic milestone,” said Aminar.

On a different note, Aminar said the national carmaker has no plans to increase Perodua car prices for now despite rising production costs caused by a weakened ringgit.

“Yes, there is impact on our costs. There are imported parts, paid in either US dollar or yen,” he said. “We will continue to absorb the higher costs.”

However, he said if it reaches a level where “we cannot continue to absorb the costs, there is a possibility we will increase prices.”

Well, they could have written a book about the list of mind blowing bloopers that were ever committed by Myvi drivers, it’d have been a better selling book. Just an opinion. (who gives a fuck how they conceived Myvi? It’s a cloned Daihatsu anyway…)

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November 17, 2015

So Young, so long…

If I were to name one breakfast joint that I regularly visit, it has to be So Young cafe. I’d written about this place a couple of times here in my blog. Sadly, after operating for many decades, the place was closed down last month to pave way for a spa or something.

A few weeks before it got closed down, I made a pilgrimage there for my final meal of breakfast. I picked to have a bowl of Uncle Tony’s flavorful Hokkien Mee (Noodles in prawn soup), a large bowl of Sweet & sour spicy mustard cabbage stew from the chicken rice stall, and a mug of thick coffee with cream there. Like I always did. Every spoonful of food I shoved into my mouth there that day, tasted bitter and down. The people there weren’t as jovial, not as chatty and the atmosphere was gloomy. It was like an impending end of a journey for those people and me that day, along with it, gone will be the acquaintances, the experiences, and memories. They’d seen each other’s kids growing up, and each other grown old, and all that was going away because somebody bought up the place to open a fucking spa. It’s sad really.

Once I’d done with the food, I went around to have a chat with the stall owners, whom I had patronized for years (from my schooling years, to the time I had my first job, to the time I had to bum for 2 months after losing my job, till now). The chicken rice guy gave me a card, told me that he was going to retire from the chicken rice business, and but would concentrate on his night venture of selling seafood at a nearby joint. Uncle Tony, however, will stop selling Hokkien Mee in the morning session, but would still retain his afternoon session at another place, another town (I’ve yet to pay him a visit). The rest will probably look for a place to rent or something.

I left that place feeling real depressed and dispirited, for I know I’m never going to find another place like So Young Cafe. I went past the place the other day, and all the zinc awning extensions were gone, and roller shutter closed shut with no activities going on.

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