November 6, 2013

pig

It really bugs me when someone throws a hackneyed insult, and acts like it’s the best thing ever. I am especially referring to the term (which many of you have heard before in forums, blogs et al) – ‘Cina babi’ [sic]. It translates to ‘Chinese pig’ (the correct term should be ‘Babi Cina’). A lot of this come from hateful people who are mostly Malay, who have the propensity to liken someone of Chinese ethnicity to a creature that they averse most – the pig. But little do they know, that the pig, is actually quite an all-rounder useful creature for the Chinese.

You see, when the Chinese pray, having a roasted pig for offering signifies wealth and generosity. When the Chinese celebrate, they have various dishes of pork as food and they share with their guests when they do that – again, that’s to paint an impression of being generous. When a Chinese couple gets married, they send roasted pig(s) as dowry, sometimes they trade the body parts too. The Chinese share their love and care with soup, and most of their soup are boiled fragrant for hours with pork bones. A lot of their idioms, phrases and words lend the word ‘pig’ to form a whole new meaning. Hell, they even have epics and poems dedicated to pigs! A pig grows very quickly, reproduces easily and therefore, offers high meat return ratio per pound of feed given (which, can be recycled from human food waste), which makes it ideal for farming. Pig farmers are often very rich people, and the society hold high regards for this profession. Almost all the parts from a pig can be used, even the hair (as paintbrush, to paint the beautiful art of their mountains and mystical animals). And pardon me for asking in a befuddled state of mind – what is wrong with associating us with pigs? We love pigs! An insult? Come on! It’s just like calling one the food you people love as an insult… like ‘Melayu Belacan’ or ‘Melayu Cincaluk’ or ‘Hindu Poppadom’ or ‘Orang Putih Kentang Goreng’… doesn’t make a lot of sense, right?

You can call me or my friends a pig, but we don’t really feel a thing. The Chinese has been literally thrown with all kinds of insults (even more commonly, their parents…), and they’re kinda biologically inured to it (that’s only because we’re so goddamn ubiquitous – we’re more than 1/5 th of the world population you stupid cheebye, and we have more creative insults invented in all the Chinese dialects than any other language in this world combined). So, nothing can really hurt them/us… except one thing – which I’m going to reveal here. You want to fuck with the Chinese and really screw them up? There’s only one way to do it – Be more successful than that Chinese person, and gloat about it. It’s an open secret that every Chinese knows. They can’t stand a successful smug. They’re going to get butthurt much, no matter how hard they deny it. Don’t believe me? Check what the housewives gossip about during Chinese New Year… there has to be some bitch with a little too much bling that stings them like salt to a big ass canker sore inside their toxic mouth. Or parents comparing their offsprings with someone else’s. It revolves around someone else’s success, and their own failure. Don’t ask a Chinese about it, he/she will of course deny it, for this is a truth. Just exploit this and see for yourself, how a person implodes from the inside, and THAT, my friend, is the Chinese’s Archille’s Heel. NOW, you can insult us properly. (but beware, what doesn’t kill a Chinese, will motivate him/her to be stronger and make a comeback!)

michaelooi  | enlightenments  | 

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