October 11, 2012


My 6 year old daughter couldn’t stop harping about wanting a goddamn rabbit (or two) as pet(s). It was in my top priority list of things to worry about and it totally ruined my weekend. After a day’s worth of cajoling and shit, Emily finally managed to convince Regine to have a couple of goldfish instead. I was like, well, that’s definitely better than a fucking rabbit so, it was on – my wife got our little kid a couple of goldfish (to placate that little tyrant), which she fondly name them as Starry and Sunny.

I thought it was going to be easy to keep a couple of goldfish, but I was fucking wrong. First mistake – I shouldn’t have assumed that a 6 year old girl would honor her words that she’d take care of a couple of fish in the name of being responsible. The truth is, she just wanted to keep them, not taking care of them. Like slaves. No strings attached. The second mistake – I shouldn’t have assumed that taking care of a couple goldfish is easy. It’s not.

So, as expected, it ended up being me having to take care of the fish. One thing I’ve learned about fish (or goldfish, for that matter) – is that goldfish seem to have the ability to turn very little amount of food into massive amount of slime and shit. I have to clean the fucking tank like, once every 2 days lest they’d stink up the whole house! (and believe me, it really stinks!). Also, they seem to be hungry all the time, and this sort of becomes a perpetual cycle of feeding them and watching them producing more shit (another thing I also learned is, fish do not have a sphincter. i.e. they can’t clip the shit off their ass, so their shit would grossly stuck out of their ass until it drops off its own.).

Me in my sorry state of woes. I’m leaving the commenting system open for any advice on taking care of goldfish – like if any of you know of any synthetic drug that can mutate the goldfish to eat/shit less, or simply being able to do it without murking up the goddamn water… just let me know.

Starry and Sunny

Just had the water changed before this photo was taken.

michaelooi  | rantings  | 

11 Comments to “pet”

  1. moo_t says:

    Feed less, and get bigger filter. If you google goldfish, you will know it is mutant carp. :-p

  2. Rosse says:

    tiny fishes can feed every other day,can clean aquarium every two weeks and it doesn’t stink like gold fish do :-)

  3. Anonymous says:

    Poison the fishes and tell Regine the fishes died because she was not responsible enough. Whenever she demands for pets, remind her about poor Starry and Sunny.

  4. littleComma says:

    Goldfish will not know when to stop eating or stop when they r full. Over feeding will kill them. Feed once a day. Ya, get a better filter system. :) n not decorating wif sands is a great idea. Good luck

  5. michaelooi says:

    moo_t – It must be a mutant to be this mah-fan.

    Rosse – Plastic fish too.

    Anonymous – I guess you must be planning the same for your kids, if you’re gonna have one/some. (or your parents did this to you?)

    littleComma – Sometimes they do stop eating (for some weird reasons). And that is when the leftover food would murk up the tank.

  6. Tan Yee Hou says:

    Here’s something that many people don’t know of: Do not change the water when washing the tank.

    Just clean the shit out and keep the water in. There’s a whole lot of bacteria in it that’s good for the fishes.

    And get a bigger filter that allows you to remove the elements without cleaning the whole tank. Put a timer on it so you won’t burn out the motor so quickly.

  7. noname says:

    Get a bigger filter; that will help to clean the tank. BTW, wise move not to get the rabbit – they shit and piss like nobody business.

  8. MimieJ says:

    To make your life bearable get your daughter involve. When you’re cleaning the tank, don’t do it alone..make her stay next to you and nag away. My dad used to do this although it’s his pet..feed the fish together with your daughter and explain the life process of the fish..make sure she know that the fish is not merely decorative item.

    My dad reared arowarna when I was 6 too, heh..I feed with crickets and climb up the chair to feed. I had to since he’s outstation a lot..I had my first fish pond rearing tilapia at 8.

    Tips : buy suckerfish..the ones that stick to the tank. My cleaning method is to take out a portion of water from the tank and put in the same amount of filtered water into the tank everyday. It only take less than 5min for me depending on size of tank.

  9. EinsamSoldat says:

    kinda like anonymous idea, it is for the greater purpose and the greater good ;)

  10. michaelooi says:

    Thanks for the suggestions guys. I kinda lived with the idea of having to fucking change the water every 2 days… so it’s not an issue at the moment…

    Perils of being a parent. More to come…

  11. passingby says:

    my dad would leave the water in, he says the fishes live longer that way due to the good bacteria,which was true. change only half of the water maybe twice a month…
    they really don’t have a concept of full,they just eat and shit as much as they like. i remember big pebbles in the aquarium does help keep the water cleaner but I think if you can afford it, bigger filter works the same.

    sucker fish sounds like the perfect natural solution

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