September 17, 2010

What do the ladies want?

There was this topic on the radio this morning during the traffic jam, on whether women want their men to look good. As usual, the DJ’s opened the topic to the listeners, and a flurry of them started to call in. I kinda expected a consistency of opinions but it was a mess. Some agreed, and some said the ladies want their men to look bad, so that he’d get less attention from other females. Some said a bunch of crap. Everyone seemed to have a different take on what it is that the women want. The truth is, though we men may have advanced far in quantum physics, we still could not really figure out for certain on what the rodless gender wants.

Well, the answer is not that simple. It’s not just about what they want, for there is no definite thing that they want in us men. It’s just not the way they work. Not that I’m saying I know the answer. I don’t (I would have won a Nobel prize if I do). But I do have a theory though, which explains most if not all of the eccentricities – the ‘inverted formula’.

Here’s how the ‘inverted formula’ works: the ladies want exactly the opposite of the present state a man is. For example, if her beau looks good and awesome, she’d want him to look sloppy. That’s because his awesomeness would make her feel insecure, and afraid of him leaving her for a better woman. He’d have to be less awesome so that she could have him all by herself. To make him less awesome, just make him sloppy and fat. Similarly, if her man’s fugly/sloppy, she would want him to look good. That’s because men like that make them look bad in front of their judgmental female friends. Like a fake Gucci bag. So to mitigate that reputation damaging potential, she’d want him to look the best at every function/occasion. Or hide him at home. And the process would repeat, after her beau changed for better/worse, she’d want him to invert his status again, until he dies. Bizzarre, but true.

This formula also works on all other things as well. Ever wondered why your girlfriend/wife always think the dinner you ordered for yourself is better than hers? The ‘inverted formula’ at work here. By reversing the formula, you’d get a more accurate picture of what the ladies want. It’s up to one’s own creativity to exploit the advantage to its most optimum level (hint: permission to go out late). It worked for me so far, even on my daughter too.

Try to assess your situation someday, you could be better off at your own choosing. ;-)

michaelooi  | enlightenments  | 

5 Comments to “What do the ladies want?”

  1. t0ts says:

    ahahahhaha, well said michael

    very good observation

  2. mott says:

    I, the woman, have no idea what women want too.

    Then again, I hate shopping but my hubs loves it. Yea..I’m the one waiting outside the shops, wishing there was a bench/couch around.

    Go figure!

  3. AMEN! Michael, well said! I agree!

  4. michaelooi says:

    mott – That explains why you don’t understand women – you’re a man trapped in a woman’s body! (and vice versa for your husband?)

  5. einsamsoldat says:

    IMHO,It is about shifting roles of who is willing to the bitch or the butch at different circumstances.

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