July 26, 2010

pussy in heat

It’s true that men are becoming pussies.

I was at a restaurant today having my breakfast, when I saw an uninvited guest came ambling in. A stray female cat (no balls, had to be a female). One of the restaurant helpers, a scrawny Indian bloke (let’s call him Appu for conveniences’ sake), was given the simple task by the manager, to evict the animal from the premise. Now, this would have been a simple task for virile men like you and me. But for Appu, he had a problem. He looked as if he was given the task to diffuse an armed nuclear warhead!

Appu literally stood there for about 20 – 30 seconds, before he decided to pinch that flab of skin behind the cat’s neck to haul its ass out of the restaurant. But because the cat was quite big, the ‘grab’ didn’t quite hold, and the cat didn’t even leave ground. Instead, for some strange fucking reasons, the cat became somewhat aroused and then lolled promiscuously to its side like it was expecting Appu to give it an oral sex or something… and started to purr softly. Appu then became confused because he expected hostility from the animal, but instead he found an unlikely suitor in match, which probably was considered an epic regression from even the tragic bride his mother chose for him back in India.

So the whole thing comically repeated for like, half a dozen times, with each time the cat becoming more and more aroused. If the cat could speak, it would have said “Oh yeessss come fuck me bebeh!!”. I almost barfed out my breakfast from the severe gagging. But eventually, Appu managed to drag the cat-in-heat out of the restaurant, with a choke hold rather than a pinch of skin. Not really a good way to treat a lover, but nevertheless entertaining, albeit in a pussy kind of way.

If you’re somewhat like Appu, scared of any four limbed animal bigger than the size of an apple, you should probably just contemplate to undergo a sex change operation at Thailand. Or, you can use the PCK maneuver.

1) P for Position with left foot (or right) next to the cat.
2) C for Cock back the other foot.
3) K for Kick, as hard as you can.

The result will be – a confused feline achieving flight at high velocity without the aid of wings or technology, out of the unwanted area, of course.

And I mistakenly thought people from India are tough or something, with the violent fighting and stunts in their action movies and whatnots…

michaelooi  | what I saw  | 

6 Comments to “pussy in heat”

  1. Arkane says:

    Ah, i guess he didn’t read your cat torture article….

  2. Eric says:

    Appu is an enlightened animal lubber being confused with behaviour of female cat in heat. No need choke holds risking rabid-inducing claws, just a shot of the antiseptic cleaning liquid spray on the head will drive it out the door or window…

  3. michaelooi says:

    Arkane – If he had, he wouldn’t be working in the nasi kandar outlet today, let alone be given such a menial assignment…

    Eric – And I suppose the cat would let you jab its ass without any hostile reflex…

  4. Primrose says:

    When I saw the title, I took a quick glance and see which pussy you were referring to. LOL! Speaking of heat, I think it’s pussy season now. So many pussies purring and ngeowing like they were having a bomb cum. Your Appu story so farney. Why didn’t take a quick photo snap?

  5. Han says:

    You still had appetite to swallow down your food from the gagging? LOL! Somehow when reading your description of the scene, I had this image in my head of Appu fingering the pussy. OKay…..

  6. michaelooi says:

    Primrose – 3 words : “faulty phone camera”. Been using the thing for many years… so, cannot expect more…

    Han – So it’s kinda erotic for you eh? Wow. Looks like I just made your day dude.

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