February 19, 2010

powderful

Some amusing email sent by a lady engineer in Company X. A person known for her insolence, lack of common sense, and a prominently hated figure, this lady engineer one day realized that the shitty food in our cafeteria isn’t doing her any good (after hoovering the same shit for a few years), given that her figure is noticeably looking more and more like a giant oil barrel. So she decided to send out the biggest cunty rant ever and copied almost everyone in the whole company directory in the mail.

From: [Lady engineer with a problem]
Sent: XXXXXX, February XX, 2010 X:XX AM
To: [Almost everyone in the email directory]
Subject: Canteen feedback
Importance: High

Dear operation team,
Yesterday I have met with [Manager 1] and complainted about canteen, anyway he asked me to point out what is not right about canteen, now since I’m not working in night shift and I need more voices from oepration team, please kindly feedback your complaints to me, so that I can compile them and send to [manager 1], [manager 2] & [manager 3]. Please kindly make it fast, I will send this email to them by noon.

Starting with my opinion:

i) No variety opinion in choosing food, instead they are not “cooking”, they are mixed whatever they have and fried to serve.
Ii) Breakfast always prepared late (after 8am), food served before 8am always is left over food from night or evening before the day and cold. The reason is all the workers start to prepare lunch and yet food for lunch will be cold during that hour.
Iii) Pricing is not certain, especially from the Chinese guy, he always takes the highest price without comparing the size of the serving (example: chicken is 1.6-1.80, he will only take 1.8 for any size and yet the size of serving is reducing perday).
Iv) They always use outside food pricing, example kuih (smaller, not tasty) than outside, but price would be the same as outside stall.
V) Dishes never cleaned (stain always left on dishes) and DRIED properly, this is actually violent the hygienic law.

These are points being seen in my point of view, please kindly bring up more especially during night shift, so that we can get canteen being “contained” and require “long term action” from them. Don’t forget, those people are also vendors to Company X, to us, only this time they are earning employees’ money instead of employer’s and yet Company X is paying electricity bill and water bill.

If we don’t protect our rights, who will?
p/s: you may feedback in English & Malay.

Thank you!!
Regards,
[Lady engineer with a problem]

Take note of the underlined phrase. That almost killed me. I guess the only thing right in her email is the order of the Roman numerals… (even that, she got the capitalization wrong). It’s hard to believe that turd is an engineer.

I cheekily forwarded this to a colleague of mine who has a deep grudge with her, with the following caption:

From: michaelooi
Sent: XXXXXX, February XX, 2010 X:XX AM
To: [Colleague]
Subject: FW: Canteen feedback
Importance: High

Your friend is trying to fight for her rights. Take note of her powderful English. My god.

I made that colleague’s day.

michaelooi  | mails/posts  | 

10 Comments to “powderful”

  1. dils says:

    I have no idea what no ‘i’ meant. Not ‘cooking’ but fried to serve?

  2. Is that kancheong lady engineer happens to be an anak dara tua ? Ekekekeke

  3. doc says:

    This one violent the grammar law. LOL!

  4. sweewon says:

    “points being seen in my point of view” … how literal!

    Btw, this is the first time I see i, ii, iii … written like “i), Ii), Iii), Iv)”… Is she a si lai?? Points Iii, Iv and V seem to suggest so.

  5. Quinn says:

    Wah!!!! Lady engineer’s England indeed very the powderful! I like the ‘violent the hygienic law’ best and I’m with you, can’t believe she’s an engineer. Indeed an insult to me!

  6. saintis says:

    sine you asked to take note the underlined part,

    *violent* the hygienic law

    if you read the sentence as

    *French* English English English

    The sentence is about right and can be translated as

    *rape/transgress/violate* the hygienic law (no kidding)

    pure coincidence or was she french in the previous life ????

    ha ha ha .. but yes .. very powderful English..

  7. EinsamSoldat says:

    God Bless Company X…

  8. Even though I live in English Land, I sometimes struggle with my ‘granma’
    Can’t stop laughing…

  9. michaelooi says:

    dils – Beats me.

    ahmad – Dah ada anak lima enam orang. Gemuk macam seladang terencat.

    doc – Violent our brain also…

    sweewon – Yeah she’s a see lai. No shit.

    Quinn – If only you know about her fucked-up-ness at work… scarier than this. She has this ‘I don’t care’ solution. “Solve this, I don’t care.”

    saintis – Well hell, she could be mixing her language with Telegu, but the key idea is, to make the second person understand, right? That she fails.

    EinsamSoldat – Tough job for god.

    Dangerous Variable – I live in Malaysia, I struggle with Bee Em too. Go figure. ;-)

  10. MaxJohn says:

    This lady previously under same roof with us? Haha.

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