June 2, 2009

motosuckingrola

My site recently registered an extra 20% daily visits – thanks to a recent link up to my Rob the Twat post from a Motorola alumni forum (or something like that).

The thread in the forum originally started as a simple post asking if the giant twat picture reminded them of anyone in their management, to which one of the guys replied that it reminded him a lot of his abominable ex-lady boss and lamented something not very nice about her. Then the thread gradually grew into some amusing banter, and one of them stood out with the following comment (check out the bolded sentence) :

[name]TheWeiner. LOL

What a perfect name for a Motorola manager. I can’t remember the last time I met one who wasn’t a dick-head. Hey [name]TheWeiner, you get back to work butt snorkelling BrownEye. Let us know if you find any great ideas up Greg’s ass.

How true. And to top that off – shitty products, lame ass company name, snooty motherfuckers. Hell, you should also check out the Malaysian Motorola uniform. Batik shirt. It’s like they’re desperately trying to remind themselves to be a douche bag everyday at work. And I don’t even want to begin with that Six Sigma crap… If those aren’t convincing enough, let me tell you of an encounter I once had at Motorola some years ago –

I was visiting a Motorola plant with my team members for a very important meeting. Because I had an even more important thing to do before the meeting, I told my team members to go ahead first, and I’d catch up with them later (I knew I was gonna be 10 mins late tops).

When I reached there after completing my stuff, I was required to register myself at the guard house before calling for my Motorola host. At the guardhouse, the security guard in charge wanted me to leave my cellphone with him… an argument ensued.

“Why do I have to leave my cellphone here?”
“It’s our company policy sir. Visitors are not allowed to bring cellphones into the premise.”
“And the reason for that?”
“For security measure sir. Motorola is a cellphone manufacturing company.”
“But mine’s a Nokia cellphone! Not a Motorola!” [hell, I wouldn’t want a stupid Motorola cellphone anyway, most of them look like parking meters]
“I’m sorry sir, you must leave your phone here if you want to enter our premise.”

So I had no choice but to comply. After I left my phone there, I got the same guard to contact my host (I had to be brought into the meeting room, as I was not allowed to roam freely in the building) – to which, he did not answer (not surprising at all, because the guy’s in the middle of a meeting). I then had to resort to call my team members in the same meeting, but then I couldn’t – they didn’t have their cellphones with them! Their phones were at the fucking guardhouse, remember? So basically, it was a catch 22 situation for me. I wanted to call someone from the meeting to bring me in there, but I couldn’t do it because their cellphones were on a rack few feet away from where I was standing. And the fucking static ass guard would just shrug me off because he wasn’t paid to worry about anything else other than to register visitors and keep them frustrated.

But I was lucky that day because one of my team members eventually figured out that I was missing, and came to check for me at the guardhouse. I was that close to leaving the fucked up place.

That was just one of the encounters. I have had many encounters before, and all of them making me arriving to the same conclusion couldn’t have been mere coincidences. It’s because their management comprises of a bunch of dick heads. That’s why they never got big in the consumer business. It takes a dick head to appreciate what another dick head does – if you get my drift.

michaelooi  | flashbacks  | 

11 Comments to “motosuckingrola”

  1. J says:

    fucking retarded company policy… stupid managements

  2. Kevin says:

    Yah Semicon factories are damn problematic. Next time just set it to silent mode then smuggle it in. They usually don’t check.
    Oh and its easier to bring in and out a laptop rather then a PC. The MIS departments will be damn anal with the data in your PC. I once almost got held up in a similar factory in China because the MIS was bitching about data and their company policy (which we had permission to bring in and out the specific PC from their director whom was having lots of meeting that day).

  3. June says:

    the security guard got it wrong. all rnd facilities require similar security measures to prevent corp espionage, serious! even the place i work has the same policy. just like in my company, it doesn’t apply to non-rnd buildings tht have teams like sales, finance, blah blah.

  4. ShaolinTiger says:

    Cibai one kind these people, stupid policies which don’t increase security – they just piss people off.

  5. michaelooi says:

    J – It would have been a better excuse if they’re retarded but then, nevermind…

    Kevin – Errrmmm why would anyone lug a fucking PC to anywhere anyway? It’s like bringing your mother in law to your bachelor’s night… inconvenient.

    June – ‘Got it wrong’ is a major understatement. More like, ‘fucked up big time’

    ST – Yeah man. Most of the time, it just takes a little common sense to get things done.

  6. sam says:

    that just normal….if you visit my factory…lol
    look like you enter to the airport security check points..

  7. LithiumMind says:

    I guess they have it for a reason. Wonder why.

  8. Kevin says:

    Errr my project deals with hardwares which uses PCI/PCIe cards… Laptops wouldn’t work for me.

  9. michaelooi says:

    sam – I feel sorry for you dude. My condolence.

    Lithium – The same reason why we have tapeworms on this planet.

    Kevin – Oh, say lar early early.

  10. moo_t says:

    Apparently, their practice of six sigma lesson failed, at the guardhouse. lol

  11. TigerShark says:

    I kinda have a better experience than you Mic. There is this paper corrugator company I’ve been to that only interest in you to leave only your cigarette box and lighter at the ghouse. :( Hphone, you can bring in. :)
    The funny thing is, you can still buy the cigarette and have a smoke in their canteen smoking area! Simply no logic at all! :):)

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