May 4, 2009

I am goofy and I don’t even know it

You know, I heard from around that kids under 10 years and geriatrics over 50 years do not have the ability to detect sarcasm. I had the chance to put the theory to test today.

I was going through the Company X security checkpoint. The procedure’s like what they do at airports, put all your belongings in a basket, and walk through a metal detector. But after I put all my stuff in the basket, the housewife security guard in charge (of about retirement age) stared at me with a concerned look and mumbled something under her breath…

Housewife guard : “… wallet… . … ..”

Me : “I’m sorry, what did you just say about my wallet?”

Housewife guard : “I need you to flip open your wallet. We are conducting random checks.” [gestures to flip wallet]

She looked very serious when she said that. Her eyeballs were like popping out.

You see, the thing about my ‘wallet’ is – it isn’t really a wallet. It’s more like a credit card holder/case. It’s made of leather, about half the size of a conventional wallet, and it only has enough little slots to store a handful of cards. Nothing else. Very small.

And this guard, demanded me to flip open my ‘wallet’. Not the other guy’s big wallet (there was another guy there), but mine. I complied nevertheless.

Me : [flips open wallet]

Housewife guard : [stern look] “Ok, you may go.”

I then said this to her out of reflex when I was putting my stuff back in my pockets,

Me : “So, you suspected that I hid the company notebook computer inside my wallet huh?”

Anyone with half a brain would have figured that I was being sarcastic. But I overestimated her intelligence…

Housewife guard : “Nooooo, how could you fit a notebook computer into your wallet?? It’s too big, right??” [looks at me contemptibly and in disbelief]

She must have thought what a retard I was. Like, there’s no way one could fit in a notebook computer into a wallet, right? Even if that’s possible, it would have been a revolutionary feat… hmmppffff.

Well, at least I know this would give her a story to tell over dinner for many more seasons in her life… about a goofy engineer in her workplace who thought he could fit a notebook computer into his wallet. (ahhahaahh mahai)

Conclusion: Sarcasm don’t go down very well with AT LEAST ONE geriatric over 50 years of age, at Company X.

michaelooi  | dialogs  | 

2 Comments to “I am goofy and I don’t even know it”

  1. […] bookmarks tagged sarcastic I am goofy and I don’t even know it saved by 4 others     Tayuya151 bookmarked on 05/05/09 | […]

  2. Sammi says:

    are lucky she didn’t ask you to open your pants.

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