I always prefer to look at people in the eyes when I am in a conversation. I believe it makes me sound confident and believable, even when I’m goofing around. And I thought, it is somewhat more polite too, to maintain an eye contact when talking.
But there are times when I find it difficult to do that. Like talking to ‘cross eyed’ individuals. In Hokkien, it is known as ‘phark cheow’ (which literally translates as ‘hit a bird’). It is a condition where both eyes are out of alignment from each other, with each looking at a different direction (like Cookie Monster here.)
God I hate talking to ‘cross eyed’ people. No I’m not saying that I hate them, I just hate the talking part (it’s different). I always find myself in this situation that I am not doing the ‘eye contact’ correctly. Like, how am I suppose to know which eye to look at? The one on the left? Or the one on the right looking at another direction? Gosh they’re all over the place. Or should I look at their nose instead, because that should be the middle part of his/her vision? You certainly can’t ask them about it, right?
“Hey, should I look at your right eye, or the left one? Can you even see me? Hello?”
That is just rude.
I happen to have a ‘cross eyed’ colleague here in Company X, and every time that guy talks to me, I’ll be caught in that miserable state that words can’t describe. So in order not to risk looking in the wrong eye and save myself from a potential embarrassment, I usually resort to pretending to rub my eyes or engross myself scratching an itch I can’t reach, just so that I don’t have to maintain the eye contact with that fella.
So far, it has worked for me, though the ‘cross eyed’ guy might think that I am some kind of a weirdo. But it’s better that he thinks I’m weirdo than confirming I’m an asshole, right?
If you guys have any trick to deal with this, please share the secret. You’ll be heavily rewarded.
I tend to turn slightly to the side and look at my watch or my phone or something, cross eyes freak me out.
I always had the same issue, which eye to look at ( .)( . )
Try focusing on the forehead…
Haven’t tried it yet, so tell me how it works out
Poke one out and you can look at the other one : )
just look at one eye, left or right, whichever on will do. just don’t look at both at the same time, else you will freak out. if the person is a lady, even easier, just concentrate on the tits, you never go wrong with the direction on that one.
Look at the center of eyebrows.
this is what i usually do lar to ‘hit the bird’ clients… i will target one of the eyes pupil, and look at it while i talk to him/her. funny you guys outhere ever observe that ‘hit the birds’ ppl also slant their head abit while in conversation? Shaolintiger… macha… (.)(.) is boobs lar not eyes O_o
I thought you’d just look at the eye that is looking back at you?
Btw, you should check this out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IZjMgbRUsZM jump to 7:10. Funny crap but the puppet *might* annoy some.
Try to focus on the face or mouth or hair :-)
Just ask him which eye is one to focus on, and look at that one. There should be one eye that is looking at you, and other looking somewhere else.
Just focus on the space between their eyes la… As long as you’re not too close to a person when speaking to them, its hard for them to tell if you’re looking at their eyes or that space I mentioned. :)
You should not look DIRECTLY at a female’s rack. It’s not wrong, but it’s rude. (not to mention stupid)
The idea is to not get caught. Sure enough, the girls probably know you’re peeking, stealing a glance, or even fantasizing. But as long as they don’t catch you doing it, it’s all cool… you see?
Tits ogling is a form of art. If you totally do not get it, never mind.
bro, just look at the mouth… i don’t focus on the eyes when i talk to ppl, just the mouth,..it also helps to read what they’re saying :p
just look at his eyes pretending that he’s not a cross eyed human
Nose and forehead or the area between the eye. You just need to focus on a particular point..
there must be an eye focusing on u if the person u are talking to is looking in ur eyes too. so just look at that one
It is called Lazy Eye.
No, lazy eye and crossed eye are 2 different conditions, though both have the similarities.
Crossed eye –> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strabismus
Lazy eye –> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amblyopia
Don’t we all learn new things everyday? (on a note about looking at them ‘right’, I guess the best is to alternate between the 2 eyes… left, right, left, right. Can’t go wrong with that… heheh)
I have the same prob too.. dunno which eye to look at. So these days i just look at the eye which looks back at me.
Mike if you do that, then the person you’re talking to is either going to know you’ve noticed his/ her condition and then become very self aware, or they’re going to think you’re a bit retarded…. :lol:
if he/she is using her good eye to make eye contact with you, you’d know which one to look at. and yeah, they always tilt their head towards the other person to use the good eye.
darn… I have trouble getting people looking me in the eyes. Malaysians are shy lot?
From experience, ‘crossed eyes’ people tend to have a focus point, u just need to get use to it and find the ‘bulleyes’ spot I guess. :\
I have the same problem too when talking to one of my colls. I find myself making contact with his left eye for awhile, and then change to the right eye and then left … etc. I just couldn’t decide which eye to look at. hmm …
Hahaha…this reminds me of my ex-colleague. This cross eyed fella sat to my left and likes to mumble. I could never tell if he was talking to me or mumbling to himself…his right eye would appear to look ahead while his left was “skewed” towards me.
I had to come up with a story that I was a bit hard of hearing in my left ear; so he would have to speak up when he talks to me…it somewhat worked I guess :-)
Sorry…it should be his LEFT eye would appear to look ahead while his RIGHT eye was skewed towards me…
Simple…always look at the middle of his forehead. That is the supposedly best way advised by most experts when dealing with correct level of eye contact. Somehow it acts as an “illusion” that either party will think you are looking at the eye.
try that :))
There are 3 places to look at:
The forehead/eyes region, the mouth and the neck-upper chest area.
Looking at the forehead/eye means you’re not very close to the person.
Looking at the mouth means you’re quite close to the person,
And looking at the neck/upper chest means you’re quite intimately related to ther person.
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