Bizarre shit that people typed in the search engine and fucking ended up in my blog instead…

1. Cat torture / Torture cat / How to torture cat – When you’re out of idea on how to be evil, why not try the search engine? Goddamn psychos. I guess they’re here because of this entry I wrote 3 years ago… (which is one of my highest hit / most read post to date)

2. dick in tamil – The best way of finding out how to say dick in Tamil is to ask your Indian friends… what a chode. (the word’s ‘koteh’ ‘kunji’ by the way)

3. bersetubuh dengan adik – The least reassuring thing in 2009 so far, was to learn that my blog’s attracting some incestuous pedophile… albeit not on intentional purpose.

4. durian as eraser – I don’t even know what this means…

5. pregnant girl with clippered hair – Now how did this end up in my fucking blog?? What’s “clippered”??

6. what does pundek means / what is pundek – One of the top searches. Apparently, some people are still living under a rock. (for the record: pundek is a type of animal that purrs)

7. tek tek perempuan – I reckon he (or she) didn’t have a good source of porn… Notice how direct his search string is… Must be a kid.

8. women ovary fucking – Kiddy search again. Kids, you don’t insert your junk into the ovary! You insert it in the armpit and vellicate (guys, shhh)

9. neighbor fuck mommy – Another kiddy search. When you see mommy getting boned by your uncle neighbor, you don’t Google! You call your DADDY!

10. yung girl pey for hand job in a car – This guy don’t even fucking know how to spell (and the strange thing was, he ended up in my blog… this is sad)

I feel sick already.