The Company X cafeteria caterer has this odd way of charging its patron extra for mixed spreads of waffle pancakes. For example, if it’s one half butter spread with second half flavored spread (peanut butter, jam, honey, etc), it’ll be only RM1.50. But if both halves are with flavored spreads, an extra 30 cents will be charged, ergo RM1.80.

The cashier is located a distance away from the waffle counter, so in order to make the customized charging process work, Company X patrons are required to ‘declare’ their waffles at the cashier like it’s a fucking taxable commodity on each payout.

I was doing that yesterday, and following conversation transpired between myself and the cashier, who is a Malay lass in her fluorescent headscarf…

Me: “One waffle, with peanut butter and butter.”

Cashier: “I beg your pardon?”

Me: “One waffle, with peanut butter and butter.”

Cashier: “So you got 2 waffles there?”

Me: “No, I said ONE waffle, with one half peanut butter and the other half butter.”

Cashier: “Peanut butter?”

Me: “You have never heard of peanut butter before? Take a look at this then.” [shows her my waffle]

Cashier: [peeks into the brown paper bag] “Ooooohhhh, itu peanut.”

Me: “No, that is not a peanut if you can’t tell. That is called ‘peanut butter’. Spread made from peanuts.”

Cashier: “Ok ok.”

I’m surprised that there are people out there who has never heard of ‘peanut butter’ before. I wonder if she actually knows what a cheebye is. If she doesn’t, well then, I wouldn’t mind to point her to look into a mirror - itu lah, cheebye yang paling besar di dunia. Ada mata dan hidung pulak tu.