January 24, 2008

boner

A couple weeks ago, my father’s sister and her husband (my aunt and uncle) came to my place for a visit. It has been some time since we last met, so, there were a lot of catching ups going on. Particularly on my daughter, Regine. The last time they saw Regine, was when she was just a few months old. But that afternoon when they came, Regine was ill and was taking her afternoon nap. So I did the next best thing for them – I showed them my daughter’s digital photos. Shitloads of them.

I brought over my notebook to the couch, and showed them a slideshow of Regine’s photos. You know how these senior people would go so enthusiastic about looking at children’s photos and all – so I was like making them happy or something, and at the same time, trying to reinforce their belief that me, Michael, whom they were so used to see as a fucking obnoxious devil, had grown into a responsible and debonair parent (oh yeah bebeh).

And so I was like, digitally flipping photos after photos of my daughter’s, wearing this super gay smile and making super gay remarks like “Oh look at her, how cuuuuuute awww” – you know, revolting behaviors that we adults sometimes unnaturally act in front of our seniors just to avoid any perception complications.

“This was when she was 8 months”
“This was the time when we brought her to the mall”
“Oh this was her first time on a swing”

You get the idea.

Just when I thought everything was going smooth and things would end well for me, it happened. The final few slides of the folder, weren’t of Regine’s. No it was not porn. It wasn’t me nekkid either. It was this picture.

My uncle squinted his eyes, and I panicked.

“Errmm, please ignore this uncle. This… errrr…. this is just a picture of my friend…. errr he buried his face on a roti canai… err…. because… errmmmphhh heheh… he was drunk” [close application and stifle from laughing]

And then we pretended we didn’t see the picture and moved on.

That was a picture of my friend Tony, which was taken when he was very inebriated on a very adventurous night some months ago (we’re all drunk). That night, someone bought some roti canai for a late night pig out, until one of my kooky friends slapped a piece of roti canai on Tony’s face and told him that it was a warm towel. I took that picture with my phone while I was wiping tears and phlegm from laughing too hard…

Happy moments, yes, but it was inappropriate at that time, you know, with these serious relatives around. I was suppose to be content and stable and shit, and showing them how much of a schlub I’ve been with my friends isn’t generally considered a very bright thing to do. It was a boner. If I had a piece of greasy ass roti canai at that warp of time, I’d have buried my face into it as well, no shit.

michaelooi  | happenings  | 

10 Comments to “boner”

  1. blusher says:

    your friend passed out? his face must be full of zits the next day, considering the amount of grease from that roti canai. LOL!

  2. wils0n says:

    Hahaha they would wonder whether you’d use capati as Regine’s diapers while bottle feeding her with teh tarik.

  3. michaelooi says:

    blusher – He was half passed out when someone handed him the roti canai… heheh

    wilson – Errrmmm, I can be a bad role model but then, I won’t do retarded things like that ler.

  4. Arkane says:

    Lesson learnt – Always sort through the photos into appropriate folders before presenting them to your viewers. Make sure those uhm…for your own consumption photos are located in some VERY remote folders.

  5. ShaolinTiger says:

    From the RSS I thought you were gonna be writing about having an uncontrollable persistent boner issue or something..

  6. Nicevil says:

    As I was reading, I expected your uncle to stumble upon a picture of your boner………. a private picture meant for emily, perhaps ?….self adoration ? which then proceeded to your uncle’s HUGE APPROVAL OF YOUR SMALL BONER…ahhhhhhh, finally, sweet sweet approval.

  7. bongkersz says:

    BONER.. very captive title haha! that’s one funny picture lol.. how awkward..

  8. michaelooi says:

    arkane – I’ve been doing that, but that folder apparently, had a few unexpected extra photos…

    shaolintiger – And why would that be so interesting to you lah dude?

    nicevil – And you?

    bongkersz – I never knew you people are so fascinated with boners. Perhaps I should make a post about a real boner.

  9. Kenny lee says:

    Niaseng you, how dare you post online sumore…! Your fren must have really f up now.

  10. michaelooi says:

    that person isn’t really my friend. he’s more like a brother to me… and he’s probably laughing like a jackass right now.

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