January 22, 2008

job rant

I’m about to rant a little bit of something about my job. But because I am bound by the non-disclosure thing at Company X, I will have to do it metaphorically. Just for the intention of complying that, I’m gonna have to ask you to imagine that I’m a surgeon. A good one at that. My job is to cut people open like a pig, remove their organs and have them analyzed in detail. Once I get all that done, I will then have to put them back in and produce a thorough report on what the fuck went wrong. Simple.

Although I can do my job quite efficiently, some of the chores can be arduously time consuming… one of them is – removing an uterus. You see, removing an uterus is not as simple as removing batteries off a remote control or anything like that. An uterus is big, complex, sensitive and stinks like a bottle of motherfucking Chinese calligraphy ink. It is something that requires a tremendous amount of time to dismantle (first remove the pussy, then the ass, then the head, spinal cord, etc – you get the idea). Labor intensive kinda job.

Yesterday, I was given 3 ladies with uterus problems at 11am. The officer wanted me to get the ladies all stitched up by 2pm. I said “No way dude, that’s impossible” – and I explained that I needed a minimum 1.5 hour for each uterus job. And that’s about one of the best you can get from an underpaid surgeon like me – with the limited equipment (I was given only a wooden ladle) and all that.

Fast forward today, I got a pep talk from my boss, that some high flying idiot (I learned this phrase today) from another department has a concern on my work. He said my delay handicapped their productivity. When I asked what’s the deal – I found out that the 3 ladies with uterus problems need to go back to work by the next day, and they were unable to because of my delay.

I protested like “What the fuck??? Can’t they go on medical leave or something?? Or get a fucking replacement for them??”. My boss then told me that the high flying idiot, being a stupid fuck he is, felt that it is much easier for me to speed up than to ask those ladies to get a medical leave (because their medical leave application process is quite complex, apparently, and they don’t like replacements).

In response to that, I went like,
“Without a functioning uterus, do you think that going to work is the most important thing those ladies should worry about? If that is so, then they should be living with the uterus problems instead. Why bother come to me?”.

Ridiculous, I know. It’s like complaining yourself having a time management problem when you could have at least surfed less internet and shirked less, rather than hoping the planet revolves around the sun at a much slower pace.

My job can be fucking frustrating at times, and it’s not even mine or my boss’ fault. It’s somebody else stupider that holds high position. That’s what happens when you get people like this holding the rein of a certain important job function. Ma fa hai puki cheebye. I hope the high flying idiot gets a stroke tonight.

michaelooi  | work shit  | 

10 Comments to “job rant”

  1. wils0n says:

    Michael I understand how you felt 101%!

    I remember watching a TVB drama where 2 people (in the same profession as I’m in) managed to come out with a proposal in ONE single night. In reality, it would take at least a week done by a team consisting of at least 4-5 person.

    Some people just do not understand how stuffs work and they think it’s very easy. Some task are just time consuming regardless of how simple it is. Sigh.

  2. Dr. Tan says:

    Yeah man I got my own fucking one today too.

    Same shit from everyone, this world gives you.

  3. moo_t says:

    When there is a delay and people rather pointing finger and though that will make them hero, they are f*cking wrong. Because that will not help the delivery, instead, as long as the bottleneck not solved, people sit at the feeding line are as bad as the bottleneck.

  4. Arkane says:

    You didn’t mention what was your boss’ stand on this issue. Just to share with you, applying the same scenario to myself here, my boss will agree with high flying idiot that i’m at fault, give me a grade A ass polishing and ask me to get my ass into the operation theatre.

    It’s bad enough to get complains from clueless idiots, it’s worse if your boss agrees with them.

    That’s a double dose of sh*t.

  5. Danielle says:

    LOVELY analogies here.

  6. michaelooi says:

    wilsOn – Yeah, that high flying idiot probably watched too much fucking cantonese drama…

    dr.tan – That’s why I’m letting it out in this blog. It’s a much safer course.

    moo_t – That’s called ‘shifting the problems’. The make the problems become other people’s, instead of solving it. Bastards.

    arkane – Well, if my boss is in league with them, I wouldn’t have gotten the chance to protest, because it’ll be an order, right? Thank god. Boss was just asking my opinion (he had 20 over years experience, I’m sure he’s more straightened out than I am. If not, he ought to be hung and shot)

    danielle – I’m a surgeon and i hate removing an uterus. Lovely.

  7. puxape says:

    just let it be dude. this kind of turd will someday f#@k himself with his ability to make enemy with everyone. anyway, there must be some “higher” flying idiot who’s squeezing his ball in the process. so relax and enjoy your uterus operation thing.

  8. Nicevil says:

    Every shit needs to be flushed away. Move on. Or you could always….

    install fucking spyware, steal their account info on facebook/friendster and delete everything and while you’re at it steal their bank info too and wait for a few decades before taking away everything………….. :D

  9. bongkersz says:

    why someone stupider always holds higher position and screws the shit out of us. damn!

  10. michaelooi says:

    puxape – The problem is, people like them kept getting higher and higher because they would drop all their self esteem to suck balls. And it’s sad for us abled people to see things like this to happen. ish…

    nicevil – Dude, has anyone told you that you have a big imagination?

    bongkersz – No idea man. Maybe they used to be smart like us long long ago… and the position consumed them to become the shell of a character they once were…

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