January 8, 2008

are dogs androgynous?

I learned something about dogs over the weekend. Something probably a lot of people already knew except me. It was told by a friend of mine, Tony – that male dogs, unlike us human, do not have the ability to differentiate genders in its own ring of society… at least not until somebody in their group starts to emit that redolent scent of love, which only then, they’d get all crazy and started to pork whoever that smells.

I do not know if my friend Tony is fucking with me but, that sounds kinda dubious, don’t you think? I mean, aren’t dogs suppose to be intelligent or something? Like, if they can sniff porn dvds out of thousands of stacks of baggage, or even guide some blind person around town – why can’t they at least have that wee bit of consciousness to realize that some of their buddies have dark wrinkled sacks hanging under their asshole and some do not? You’ve got to be shitting me if they’re that ignorant, man.

In my own ways of interpreting this fact, that would mean, dogs always think of themselves as androgynous, and probably if they do not get to smell any of those bitch-scent in their lifetime, they’d probably go ahead with the delusion to split themselves into 2 dawgs through asexual reproduction process (yeah man, like amoebas).

Maybe some of you who knows a little bit about dogs can confirm this – if my friend Tony has been fucking with me.

michaelooi  | thoughts  | 

10 Comments to “are dogs androgynous?”

  1. Sam says:

    your friend ain’t fucking with ya, he’s right.believe it!

  2. Omake says:

    Yeap. if you see wild-dogs in group.. You will notice them sniffing on each other buttocks…

  3. dy says:

    lol, its true, thts why you can see lots of gay dogs around.

    most dogs porky are male-male.

  4. Uhm…i am not entirely clear with your friend, tony’s theory. Dogs don’t think themselves as androgynous, they just have different ways of discerning their gender than humans.

    As someone who’s had 3 dogs for almost a decade, I know that the reason why dog sniff their butt is because they’re getting to know each other – they need the scent to cement the social acceptance status like “if you let me sniff your butt, that means you’re okay with me” kinda thing. Dog sniffing butts are like humans giving each other a handshake basically. And sniffing butts is also a way for them to know if the other dog is male or female.

    While my female dog has humped trees, cars and legs – the vet told me that it’s just the way it is for dogs, regardless of sex, to show that they’re being friendly. Or horny.

  5. Nicevil says:

    I think dogs understand things far better in terms of smell than observable physical differences.
    Male dogs can tell whether it’s male or female by the excretion of pheromones from a female dog. (More often during ‘heat’)
    Another example is how male dogs approaches a female human crotch when she is on her period.

    Now to the question of whether dogs can tell gender differences without relying on smell, that I don’t really know for sure.
    It’s like saying whether humans can tell gender differences without relying on sight, hearing, smell, or touch.

    Maybe one day someone can create an experiment, where a mechanism can be fixed on a male dog’s ass which releases
    pheromones that usually attract other male dogs…… and see what happens. Will the male dog be able to see the huge bulging
    balls and back away safely, or will it screw the male dog ? God only knows.

    But then again the act of sexual mounting has been observed to be normal play behavior in both female and male dogs, so
    it might just be the act of friendlyness. That’s why sometimes you see dogs ‘mounting’ little innocent kids and their owners.
    That’s why sometimes you see females dogs mounting both male and female dogs.(during heat) It’s just a friendly playful act… sometimes.

    The moral of the story is that you should get a male dog to be your ‘wife-period-omfg alarm’ so that you can escape every period-outbreak every month safely. ;D

  6. michaelooi says:

    Ok, so dogs ARE androgynous… without an olfactory organ. (that also means, their eyes are pretty much fucking useless).

    What a sad animal.

  7. sasha says:

    hahah that’s why u see sometimes they are humping the same sex

  8. Nicevil says:

    When you’re a dog who has 1 million times the power of smell compared to humans, who needs eyeballs ? XD

    Imagine being able to smell a horny female from a few hundred feet away at any given time… imagine.

    Imagine….. O__O

  9. Adrian says:

    Well, sometimes a male dog mounting another male dog is to display their dominance over the other. Its like saying “You are my bitch!”. But most time than not, it is just being horny, and playful. Imagine some dogs not having any sexual activities and no masturbation for weeks or months, so when they see another dogs, they just don’t care and want to release the tension within.

    Most likely than not, when a male dog really had sexual intercourse with a female dog, that male dog will not be interested in mounting another male dog anymore.

    But when a female is on heat, almost all the male dog will go crazy because its like an invitation for them to hump. Its just basic instinct, except this one chihuahua that I know of. He’s really a homosexual, not mounting female dog at all.

  10. Only dog lovers will know, are you? :0)

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