August 21, 2007

I’m working with retards

I requested for a heatsink for one of my lab computers last week. As usual, I was made to go through shitloads of paperwork to get that paltry 5 dollar part. Come today, one week post my official request – the heatsink was still nowhere to be found (normally, it would take only a couple of days). That was when I send an email to check with our Inventory Control (IC) department (the same department that The Gimp works in – if you can remember him), on what the hell’s going on here…

From : Ooi, Michael
To : [IC guy #1]; [IC guy #2]; [some manager from other department]
Cc : [IC manager #1]; [IC manager #2]
Subject : [XXXXX]

All

May I ask what happened to this part I requested?
From the form, it seems that the part has been physically pulled – but I have yet to receive the part…

Kindly advise.

I may sound like a very innocent guy in that mail… but that was just me trying to be courteous and shit. In actual fact, I was somehow pissed, because all it takes for those bums to approve my fucking heatsink was just a couple clicks of buttons in the electronic form – I could have gotten the heatsink on the very same day had they been a wee tad more efficient.

Exactly 7 minutes later, I received a reply from IC department…

From : [IC guy #2]
To : Ooi, Michael; [IC guy #1]; [some manager from other department]
Cc : [IC manager #1]; [IC manager #2]
Subject : RE: [XXXXX]

Hi Michael,

I was called up you few times on yesterday afternoon but nobody pick up the call.
Kindly please print out the [electronic form]and issue the part from the [some location that I have no idea], beside that contact IC guy #1 (ext# XXXX) or IC guy #3 (ext# XXXX) to verify the physical part and paste on the IC sticker.
Thanks.

Best Regards,

IC guy #2
Inventory Control
Email: Ayam_a_retard@companyX.com
Direct Line: XXXX
Fax No: XXXX
* Challenges Used to Improve Our’s Strength

I had to fucking read a few times to understand that gibberish on his email (check his signature quote out… pfftt. I bet he filched that off some graffiti he found at a Chinese elementary school toilet somewhere…).

It seems that IC guy was trying to put the blame on me for the delay… you know, simply because he wasn’t smart enough to relay a message to me? Yeah.

Being a nice guy I am, I replied courteously again…

From : Ooi, Michael
To : [IC guy #2]; [IC guy #1]; [some manager from other department]
Cc : [IC manager #1]; [IC manager #2]
Subject : RE: [XXXXX]

IC guy #2,
My bad, for being so busy and not at my desk – I apologize.
But you could have left me a voicemail or sent me an email – I’m sure you know what they are.

Anyway, I’ll work out with IC guy #1 to get the part. Thanks for the info.

Michael Ooi
Failure Analysis – Company X.
Direct Line : XXXX
Direct Fax: XXXX
*”You don’t win friends with salad” — Homer Simpson*

I’m not even sure if he gets my crudely veiled sarcasm. But anyway, it’s there for the record and for his managers to appreciate.

Retards, they’re here and everywhere. It makes me feel like I’m surrounded by aquariums full of dugongs… everything’s fat and in slow motion and job never gets done…

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10 Comments to “I’m working with retards”

  1. Lee Wing Kheong says:

    biasa la tu working for [company X]….

  2. Rodney says:

    Man.. it would be faster for Finance to approve 50 ringgit and drive to a computer shop and get the heat sink..

    wtf with printing out an ELECTRONIC copy?

  3. Jase Lee says:

    Dude…. can they all beat WT that u and me hated him till the end of time?

  4. michaelooi says:

    LWK – Cmon man, fuck off lar. I know you are not who you are.

    rodney – I would be glad to get it off shelf if I can, my friend… but this heatsink is no ordinary heatsink. It’s a super duper enhanced one of a kind hypercooler that cannot be found anywhere else other than Company X…

    jase – You mean that son of a bitch Patrick? (Yes I call him Patrick here). Patrick is the epitome of all fucked up people in Company X… nothing beats him lah dude.

  5. cbljlkkj says:

    Amen brother. I for one cannot stand the work ethics here. Inefficiency is any company’s enemy, and yet they embrace it with open arms.

    No discipline in society nowadays. I was watching Ratatouille last night with some friends when some nincompoop’s child was acting all noisy and pushy.

    It irritated me to no end. It wasn’t just one child, it was many of them, all scattered throughout the cinema. When it came to the point i couldn’t take it anymore, I literally screamed “Control your children, have you no sense of morale!”

    The kids aren’t to be blamed but the parents are. What has society degraded to?

  6. d'Fish says:

    hehehe…seriously no comments man… i work with retards like tat daily. You tend to get prone and use to them. Most of the were dropped on their head when they were babies, i guess.

    p/s : finally got my new cam.. come check it out

  7. michaelooi says:

    cbljkkj – They sure have plenty of ‘morale’ left in them, as you can tell by the number of kids they churned. I’m sure you do meant ‘moral’ in your verbal confrontation eh?…

    d’Fish – Or probably they’re just plain damn stupid down in their genes…

  8. azh says:

    owh retards are everywhere!! As irritating & annoying as ever.. N i’m stuck with one here..

  9. cbljkkj says:

    Woops, I actually meant “Morals”. Accidentally slipped and typed E instead of S on the keyboard. Haha, thanks for pointing that out

  10. michaelooi says:

    azh – One. I’ve got at least 20 dozens. I’m more fucked than you.

    cbljkkj – It’s ok. I’m awesome and I can understand.

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