a little Monday rant
There’s a nice chicken rice stall near where I work. Operated by this humble and friendly lad. His food is cheap, and he’s always friendly. We kinda like him. That’s why we always frequent to his stall for lunch. Except when his wife is around…
You see, his wife is completely the opposite of him. Always wearing this acerbic look as if we poisoned her family dog or something. And she always overcharges us for the same fucking plate of chicken rice with the same config that we get when she isn’t around. A consummate bitch. Everyone hates her… and I can tell that the chicken rice dude hates her too. (That’s because they don’t speak a lot).
The whole thing kinda made me ponder in length - what are the qualities that a man looks for in a woman that would make him happy throughout a conjugal relationship? There are many subjective answers to that, easy answers. With the advancement of technologies, one can simply wiki-the-fuck out her husband’s peculiar behavior off the internet and she’d be that much knowledgeable about male evolution through the few centuries. But sadly, those conveniences are often misused. Modern housewives nowadays are more keen to use the internet for trivial matters - like discussing about their manicures or how to reduce their giant cactus shape into an hourglass figure… (you get the idea).
This definitely have to change. The girls need to understand us guys more for the good of humanity. You see, it’s fucked up people like that chicken seller dude’s wife that makes a relationship sour. Lack of understanding. She should go work somewhere else if she’s not that happy about helping out at the stall. Not only she reflected badly on herself by having that stinking attitude, but on her husband as well - which in turn, translates into monetary losses when the bad vibes begin to repel customers. I reckon that it’s a matter of time before that chicken rice dude snaps and go apeshit, and shove all the leftover chicken bones into her ass before calling for a divorce. It’s a brewing disaster bound to happen.
We do not need more people to get divorced and have more of these broken marriages to churn out more fucked up kids. We need to do something. Like finding a cure for our sex addiction and also how to procreate without tits and clits. It’s damn science fiction if you were to ask me but, it’s still a hell lot more easier to consider all that near-impossibilities than asking these women to be more savvy of our existence. (hell, most of them don’t even know how to change a flat tyre for fuck’s sake! How can you expect them to understand guys??)
I don’t know what else can we do to improve the situation other than pray. I have solved a lot of complex technical problems at work, but none of it were comparable to this. Right now, I can only feel thankful to have Emily, who’s not a little bit like that chicken rice seller’s fucking wife… and rest assured, I’m gonna make sure my Regine’s going to be like her mom when she grow up.
You guys take care.
I know a laksa fella who’s exactly like that. Since he knew me back from my childhood (kindy) days and he’s happy that I still frequent his stall after 25 years he usually “tambah” more “liao” in my bowl of laksa. but when his wife is around, she will make sure that doesn’t happen. wtf man, how much losses are you going to make by adding that extra bit of servings in your regular customer’s bowl of laksa ? if you don’t finish selling the laksa for that day, it’s going to go into the drain anyway.
eh my place here also got a claypot rice fella the wife also like dat and a few chicken rice fella couple also like dat . why ah ?
hmph, greedy wives. i pity those men, and respect them for being patient with that kind of woman for a wife.
Guys who sell food = Humble blokes
Wives who help sell/make the food = Women who wished they married someone else that doesn’t sell food for a living.
You’d be surprised what shapeshifters can be like in the bedroom.
*Growl*
arkane - Peoply normally call this kind of spoil-sport female spouses as ‘Yoko Ono’. So you can now refer your friend’s wife as ‘Yoko’.
eg. “Hey Yoko! Shut the fuck up or I’m gonna pry your cheebye open and pour this bowl of boiling laksa into it!”
sasha - I suppose dead chickens emit some badass radiation that fucks the female brain? o_O
anas - Yeah, pity that guy. I mean, he could have married his own Indonesian maid and it still wouldn’t be that bad…
gatal - From the way you put it, they’re like wild animals? I don’t want to fuck a wild animal man. If i want to fuck a wild animal, I’d rather do it with a tiger. A tiger is many more times kewler than a bitch ass motherfucking shapeshifter… you know what i mean?
I think most of the hawkers are like that one lah. The husband is normally friendly and gives generous, bigger servings. But the wife will normally tend to be more “kiam siap” and more calculative.
That’s why i prefer buying food from uncle than auntie. LOL.
No offense meant in this post okayyyyyyy…..
This is something I’ve noticed more often among Chinese guys. They are so damn hen-pecked! I have a friend who is a nice guy and all. He is quite interested in cars and modding and all that, but he just hides his interests the moment his fat ass chick appears!
Like once, he was asking me how much my side mirrors with the signal LEDs cost. I told him and he was really interested in getting a pair. Then his fat ass chick waddled up to him and said “Wei! Don’t simply waste money! You have to save it for our holiday right?” And all he said was “Yes dear, you’re right.” Muthafuck!!!! The thing cost only blardi RM140 la!
I wanted to tell him instead of buying a pair of side mirrors, he should buy a pair of nuts, cos the ones he had were obviously pawned to his gf when they started going out!
My college canteen some years back had the same thing. There was this bitch who would charge morning fried rice more than the guys who helped run the place, who didn’t mind giving us a little bit more than usual, especially if we knew them and stuff. She was a fat, double-chinned, middle-aged lady, so we eventually called her Chibai-Face Aunty. It stuck.
G’day Michael. I’m a new reader of your blog and I would say is more worth reading then 95% of blogs out there.
Lolz, I think why those godzilla wifes charge more is they are jealous that their friendly husband is more humble towards customers better then they showed to their godzillas. Revenge towards customers: Charge higher then usual with lesser amount of food. Losers.
Anyway, keep up the good work on your blog!!!
hehe .. it takes a lil effort to kill the bitch attitude ~
tEo - That tells us one thing, aunties suck. (well, not literally but… you know what I mean)
MT - I don’t think this is about ‘having nuts’. Looking at it from another angle, I’d say your friend just wanted to avoid conflict by compromising the differences. But of course, such good traits should not be taken for granted for too many times. Your friend might ‘explode’ one day and kill the bitch.
unladen swallow - For a moment there, I thought you said her “chibai stuck”… hahahh!
normy - Thanks for admiration. I’d appreciate if you can send me an iPod please.
arsky - Why would I want to do that lah? I can just move on and go eat something else, right? You young people are so compulsive… aisehman.
Sometimes the problem with women is that before they got married, they were the Hello Kitty type; sweet, caring and just loving. After they got married, they became Tiger Woods, meaning a Tiger wielding a wood baseball bat. I got friends who fell for this kind of girls and now they are in suffering hell.
I guess it is all luck on the type of girls that we find in our life.
Agree, agree, agree (on women over trivial matters and increasing divorce rates)! Err… but I’m a woman too (but gawddamn, I’m NOT going to help my future husband sell chicken rice). Sigh. Can’t live with them, can’t live without them.
Oh, and why must it be an iPod every time?
Damn. Makes me scaredlah want to get married, people. Somemore just went through some potholes in a relationship.
I agree with your post on this. Same thing goes for my school cafeteria which I would not name. The canteen boss/tauke is corteous and polite but the wife damn fussy and the look on her face, u know the type that says you owe her a couple million bucks type? stupid bitch la! I never buy food from the cafeteria when she is looking after it. I’d rather starve. I enjoy reading your blog. Very informative and the word FUCK is fully utilised.
adrian - Hhahah, Tiger Woods. That’s original. It gives the phrase “Fucking Wild Animals” a whole new meaning.
primrose - Well, it wouldn’t be that nice if I ask someone to buy me a car, right? So, it has to be iPod lor…
azizi - The trick is, to live with your prospective girlfriend for a period of time before you decide to marry her. This is like, trial period to determine your future. Trust me dude, it cuts down a lot of risks.
xTr3me - That’s why we often see emaciated husbands with a heavyweight wife amongst the older generations… that’s because the wife absorbs every fucking thing in his miserable life. Middle aged aunties, if you’re reading this - go fuck yourself and treat your husband better.
Perhaps the male chicken rice seller did something to the female chicken rice seller in the past that led her to be the way she is? Hard to say… Certain incidences do change people for good.
Or sometimes we can look at it differently. Life as a chicken rice seller is definitely not what you call luxurious. Most of the time they have to live under tremendous pressure like their financial situations. Under this kind of pressure, of course a person can become moody or sometimes bitchy.
And on the trial period thing, that is the best idea ever. Forget about all the religion practice. Go for the “trial period” and you’ll find out more about each other than you can imagine. Besides, that can get you prepared.
I read somewhere that Japanese women have a tendency to be very nice and submissive when they’re dating, then turn bossy when they’re married. Suspect a lot of our own Malaysian Chinese women are like that too =P And same for guys, don’t treat your girl like a princess in the early phase and then expect her to wash your feet after you get married.
People should be more honest and show their real personality from the start instead of putting on an act to “kau” the opposite sex. That would probably help the divorce rate a lot.