December 16, 2006

Giant Battle Monsters

Behold, denizens of Earth… it’s the battle of the century, between 2 of the most fearsome powers the universe has ever fucking known… MichaelOoi attacks Mat Rempit (using Intelligence)!

MichaelOoi

Strength: 7 – I’m strong bebeh!
Agility: 3 – that’s because I’m old
Intelligence: 6 – I’m more experienced

MichaelOoi is a Giant Squid that breathes Ice Vapour, Fell from the Sky, has a mean Left Hook, a Humorous Nephew Sidekick and Staring Red Eyes, and is Sensitive to Noise.
——
When attacking:-
Strength: 8
Agility: 3
Intelligence: 6

Cold attack!

************VS.************

Mat Rempit

Strength: 4 – skinny fucks weak shits
Agility: 8 – they and their heavily modded crotch rockets
Intelligence: 4 – IQ equivalent of an exhaust pipe

Mat Rempit is a Giant Moth that shoots Laser Beams, has Black-and-White Stripes and a single Horn on its Forehead, can Leap Great Distances, and is Poisonous.
– carbon monoxides are poisonous alright…
——
When defending against MichaelOoi:-
Strength: 5
Agility: 9
Intelligence: 5

MichaelOoi wins!

******************

Customize your own monster fight at http://thesurrealist.co.uk/monster

michaelooi  | nonsense  | 

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