November 28, 2006

nuts and tools

I was on my way to answer the call of nature and saw Mojo Jojo coming out of the washroom, eyes locked on the floor and chuckling all by himself. It was as if he just had a romping session with some clowns inside the washroom, you know, with tears and phlegm shooting out from his eyes and nose respectively.

I didn’t give much thought about it until I went into the washroom myself, and realized that there wasn’t anyone inside. That was when the hairs on my nape stood, and a chilling thought loomed over my head – why the fuck was he laughing by himself like that?

I mean, yeah, we sometimes do weird things like laughing by ourselves. I myself did that before. An example would be when I got reminded of what I did to Skippy the cat many years ago (ahaks). But of course, when I do that, I’d always make sure I am alone. That is to prevent people from thinking that you’re a freak or something. But Mojo Jojo on the other hand, he’s of a different league when it comes to laughing by himself. He was doing it the ‘freak way’, which in my humble opinion, is not in compliance with the public consensus of what may be considered ‘OK’ at all.

After I flipped my prick dry and washed my hands, I went into the lab to confront the potential sociopath…

Me : “Hey man, I want to ask you something. I saw you laughing like a jackass by yourself when you came out of the washroom just now. What were you laughing at?”

Mojo Jojo : “Who, me?”

Me : “Yeah you motherfucking freak. Why were you laughing by yourself?”

Mojo Jojo : “No I didn’t. You must be mistaken someone else for me”

Ahhh denial. The first sign of mental sickness. Like one always say, a wacko won’t admit that he’s crazy when asked a direct question.

Me : “I’m absofuckinglutely sure it was you. Were you laughing at the insufficient length of your own dick back there in the washroom? Or what was it?”

Mojo Jojo : “No I swear I didn’t laugh by myself!”

Me : “Yeah right. You make sure you stay 10 feet away from me at all times, you freak! I don’t want you to get anywhere near me, you hear me?”

And he maniacally started his signature laugh again… [cues in Twilight Zone music and blood graphics draping down the screen]


Man, that’s fucked up. No matter how far he offsets his distance from me, I know… I’ll never feel safe in the office or lab ever again… I think I’m going to start sneaking around to see if I could catch him swallowing a screw driver or something, and get a more tangible proof to nab this guy to an institution… hmmm…

michaelooi  | what I saw  | 

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