August 15, 2006

your name tells me a lot about you

Names. Everytime I see names, my mind will automatically project an imaginary face to go with it. Sometimes, it even goes with the characteristics of that person as well… you know what I mean? It’s like, an unconsciously automated stereotyping that’s hardcoded in my head or something like that. One that’s totally out of my control.

I don’t know why I’m like this. Maybe it’s something about the way my complex mind goes, but then, this also probably has got to do with my long past experience as well. I just don’t know why. But whatever the reason is, it’s not making me think like a good person. Because of it, I prejudiced about a person by the name before even meeting him/her.

Just like yesterday, when one of my colleagues mentioned about a girl who goes by the name ‘Evelyn’. Almost immediately, I remarked about her as:

“…either that girl has got to be the ugliest shit around, or she’s just gonna perform real bad in sex.”

And I haven’t even met that ‘Evelyn’ in person before. The impression that the name painted on me, is suffice to say, not good in nature. For no reasons. Maybe there are, but I cannot remember.

Amongst the names that always give me negative impressions:

Raymond – a salesman with a protruding jowl and face full of acne craters. Speaks quickly and rapidly (you can hardly understand him) like he has a gene of a housefly…

Robert – some fat businessman who’s balding… and would take any opportunity to sexually assault any female species (or a minor) anytime, anywhere, anyhow.

Anthony – a guy next door like any common dude you see on a street. But hidden behind him, is a dark side of his split personality… which goes about raping corpses and dead animals. Most Anthony’s… I imagine them to come with a goatee.

Mary – an extremely obese girl who can’t clip her toenails because she’s too fat to even wrap her outstretched arms over her gigantic belly. Some little hint of BO around her, like a wet moldy carpet or a wet dog, whichever’s more accurate.

Denise – a moderately obese girl who overdresses herself to the extreme. Also someone who likes to pretend that she’s very popular and would flirt around with basically any male species in her office. But somehow, everyone fucking hates her.

Steven – a scrawny geek with thick specs and testosterone level equivalent of a Pikachu soft toy. Usually has super thin and hairless pair of legs, with convoluted networks of green veins visible underneath that seemingly transparent layer of livid skin.

Mark – a muscular tanned guy with curly hair. Has a pair of rock hard butt and a penchant of dressing himself up with designer clothes. But he’s a fag.

That’s to name a few. There are many more. Might probably offend too many people to list them all out here.

But of course, I acknowledge that the whole thing’s about me. Most of the time, I turned to be wrong about the prospected characteristics of the names. For those that I had projected right, I didn’t feel too proud either… for it is not something morally right for me to judge people like this… Mea culpa.

Maybe all these are signs that I’m fast transforming into a reclusive xenophobic old man. Or I could all along be psychologically disturbed myself. I think I may need some professional help here… (in the form of monetary aid, that is… give me more money, and I’ll definitely be a better person…)

(As for that ‘Evelyn’, I confirmed later that she happened to look like a Japanese AV pornstar, and she dressed like she’s the backup dancer to that cruddy Fast and Furious 3 teriyaki song)

michaelooi  | imaginations  | 

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