July 21, 2006

road brawl

I witnessed a brand new Waja almost reared another car the other night. The Waja was driven by an Indian bloke with his family. Apparently, he thought the car in front was about to beat the red light, and decided to tailgate real close (just so that he would save himself some precious minutes which he could use to pick more cooties from his greasy hair). But he got it all wrong. The car stopped for the light. As a result, Indian bloke had to floor his brakes and screeched for a few feet, before managed to halt his Waja just about a couple inches away from hitting that car.

I was over the adjacent lane witnessing the whole incident, and gave that Indian bloke a “you’re one hell of a fucked up piece of humanity tumor” gawk. (I was disturbed with the fact that he did that stunt with his family inside). What a jerk, I thought. Someone could get hurt from this, all because of his compulsive behavior.

That Indian guy noticed me gawking at him of course, and he tried to justify his embarrassment by gesticulating at the front vehicle, all the while with his eyes locked towards me. Seeking for empathy, I reckon. I decided to look away, lest he might think I wanted to look for trouble. I’d be glad to cream his brown ass, but not on that night. I was already late for an appointment, and I did not want to be any more tardy than I already was.

So I looked away. About a good 5 or so seconds later, that Indian bloke got out and walked over to that car which he nearly hit. He then turned over to look at me, and warily glanced around if anyone else was looking at him. Yes, he had all the attention on him and that was when his guts perked. In quite a dramatic fashion, he began to flail his hands all over, like someone having an epileptic fit or something … and then pointed at the car driver – who happened to be a scrawny Chinese dude in his 30’s.

Scrawny guy tried to ignore that Indian bloke initially, but was eventually pissed enough when that guy continued to harass him by exhibiting some violent gesticulations (which, I reckoned was learned from various Hindustan fight flicks). Then Scrawny did the unthinkable, he flipped Mr Amitabh Bachan a bird. That was when I saw our Hindustan hero basically went nuts and began to yell like a madman out there on the open road. Like a hostile gorilla taunting for a mate competition. It was quite a sight.

Just as I thought things were about to get interesting, the traffic light suddenly turned green and it was all over for Amitabh Bachan. When most of the car around started to engage their gears to move, he bolted back to his car and had to call it a night for his short episode of roadside drama (unless of course, if he intended to extend our entertainment by getting himself run over by the hordes of vehicles behind him…)

So, no physical contact was made. How disappointing. But then, even if given the chance to, he’d probably just make plenty of noise out there without action. I’ve seen people like him around. They only spell trouble when there’s enough of them to form a mob. When they’re alone with enough attention, they’re just irrational. Just out there to extravagantly display his bravado. To bask on attentions (Had there been a bus full of Indian chicks witnessing the event, I reckon that he’d probably tear off his clothes and start assaulting the car trunk with some exaggerated mouth induced sound effects. No shit). To show off to his wife and kids that daddy can be like a macho Hindustan hero too. Bullying undersized pallid Chinese guys, breaking his bones and all the stupid traffic rules in the country. Nothing else.

And that guy definitely reminds me a lot of the people around here in Company X. They’re slugs, worms and invertebrates when alone… but when the boss’s around, they all would suddenly turn into dramatic Hindustan actors, licking clits, sucking dicks and picking ticks.

michaelooi  | what I saw  | 

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