May 23, 2006

work memo

I received this work memo in my mailbox today:

Prohibited equipment on Company X premises (unless approved, installed, and/or issued by Company X Facilities) includes, but is not limited to:

Lamps/decorative lights (incl. lava lamps, Christmas lights, etc.)
Aquariums
Television sets
Space heaters
Refrigerators
Electric skillets
Microwave ovens
Toasters and toaster ovens
Popcorn machines
Hot plates or cup warmers
Lit candles or open flame of any kind
Water coolers (electric or non-electric)
Dartboards
Full-sized indoor basketball goals
Bar-B-Q grills (propane or charcoal)
Propane fryers
Any other equipment that Facilities and Environmental, Health & Safety deem a risk to employees or Company X property

Somebody must have ACTUALLY brought in those stuffs for the management to work out this prohibition list! Bar-B-Q grills, propane fryers, can you fucking believe that?? Company X employees must be kooky enough to imagine themselves picnic-ing at a park! That sure tells you a lot about my workplace, eh? Goddamn!

I’m surprised that nobody brought their Rottweilers and frisbees to the office yet.

michaelooi  | work shit  | 

11 Comments to “work memo”

  1. Hahahahaha… it shows that the company is damn kamsiap…

    refrigerator?! Don’t your company have refrigerator for employees to keep their food…

    how did an employee bring a fridge in? Must be some Tan Sri or Datuk…

    hahahahah Television sets… wah…

    I guess the company only recently found out about it…

  2. nylus says:

    it doesn’t say anything abt a mini-sized indoor basketball goals, wonder who’ll bring it? =P

  3. michaelooi says:

    william – I don’t know how did they bring a fucking refrigerator into the office man. It’s totally ridiculous

    nylus – I’ve seen those in somebody’s cube. Yeah. And you know what? I’ve seen people grow a garden out from their cube too. If it gets any more out of control than that, that place’s gonna be crawling with bugs and small reptiles. No shit.

  4. zbjernak says:

    last time we kept a personal aquarium in office….
    a electric cooker….
    a rice cooker….

    then i know my dad had an iron, rice cooker er….pillow, spare uniforms in his working place
    heheeheheh

  5. MorpheusX says:

    Aahh… those good old days of roasting the chicken wing under the tender lights of the flourescent lamp…

    I do miss them…

    WTF!!!

  6. Here’s one:

    My colleague, a lady, had her cubicle full of TOYS!

    It is always fun to go to her cubicle… imagine if anyone of us get stressed we just go to her cubicle… there are just so many TOYS… you name it… Lego, Gundam, EVA, The Incredibles, X-Men…

    … maybe i should start treating my cubicle as Second Home just like Malaysia’s Second Home program for foreigners…

  7. michaelooi says:

    zbjernak / morpheusX – Man you people are nuts! I have absolutely nothing inside my cube, except my notebook and A LOT of trash. Getting personal with my workplace will be the last thing I wanna do on this planet.

    william – I see them a lot at my office too. Girls decorating their cubicles with fluffy toys and then complain about lack of space to the management…

  8. anas says:

    ovens? toasters? fryers? bbq grills?

    i think it’s because your company canteen serves bad food the employees have to cook their own food in the office…:)

  9. Hijackqueen says:

    What’s wrong with a microwave or toaster in the pantry? If anyone of my kolig bring microwave, we are sure going to pinjam it. So you think who dare to bring.

  10. michaelooi says:

    anas – Spot on!

    hijackqueen – Some people toasts stuffs that they’re not supposed to toast. That’s why it’s a problem.

  11. megabigblur says:

    More things to add to the list:

    Fireworks
    Vibrators
    Guns with calibre 9mm or larger
    C4 plastic explosive
    XBox/PS2/Gamecube
    Waterbeds
    Aromatherapy burners
    Lock picking tools
    Livestock
    Grenade launchers

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