Archive for April, 2006

April 29, 2006

being an engineer

I got this email from a reader. It’s kinda interesting (his question, my reply) and thought maybe someone else could benefit from this – what do I think about being an engineer (hell, alright, this is another filler post again. But fuck, it’s labor day! I needed the break!). So I decided to post this :

From: [reader]
To: [michaelooi]
Date: Apr 29, 2006 4:36 AM
Subject: Hi I have a question

Hi, you must be wondering who the hell is this.

I stumbled upon your blog recently, I must say you write really damn good. You’re the best I’ve seen among malaysian bloggers. — [that's my kembang moment if you can't tell...]

Anyways you mentioned being an electrical engineer. I’m an engineering student currently deciding which field to enter, in the engineering science category.

You see, I believe one does best when he has passion in what he does. I don’t wanna wake up every morning going to work in a job that I hate. I’m considering electrical engineering. Do you think electrical engineering is fun ? Interesting ? You don’t seem to blog much about the job lol.

The first year of studying involves learning all the basic theory and math skills and other fundamentals. About the engineering job, I have no freaking idea how it feels like. I guess I should go for internships and find out for my self huh ? LoL.

Feel free not to reply, I understand, I’m asking pretty much a dumb question.

But it’d be nice to get a idea of the job from such a experienced electrical engineer such as yourself.

O WISE MASTER OF WORDS PLEASE BESTOW ME WITH YOUR WISDOM !— [how can I not reply this awesome guy?]

Here’s my reply.

From: [michaelooi]
To: [reader]
Date: Apr 29, 2006 11:46 AM
Subject: Re: Hi I have a question

Hi [reader]
frankly speaking, EE is not my original choice either. God i hated electronics and that was not my idea of fun at all. You know what my passion is? Arts and photography. Or sex (if given such choice exist).

But given the circumstances that double E was the way of the future, I finally opted for that choice and am glad making that choice right. At least, I landed myself a stable job now. And can pretty much find another without breaking a sweat.

So, sometimes, it isn’t up to a person to be able to decide what’s fun for himself. It’s the circumstances. Can’t say I enjoyed my job much but, hell… I doubt many people on this planet enjoy working, even if it’s something of your interest. You’d probably get an asshole boss when you get a job you like … such is life. (ironically, I’m saying this to you with Labour’s Day round the corner)

Just, don’t worry too much. You’ll be fine. Cheers

I know, I didn’t answer his question directly. The fact is, there’s no answer to this. If I have an answer for anyone to have a good career, I would have been a successful person by now. But look at me, I’m short of a few wire bonds towards being a complete package of IC. Let alone to populate an intricate network of schematic diagram.

Engineering isn’t fun. It’s fucking hard. It’s fucking frustrating. It’s fucking ridiculous. It wouldn’t be that good if it’s easy… alas, nothing’s easy. (even pimps have their dilemma). But what’s left in life to be enjoyed if it’s without some challenge?

Have a happy labour day, workers. (though the only thing to be happy is to get more $$$, duh)

michaelooi  | mails/posts  | 16 Comments
April 26, 2006

close to you

In MSN today…

titoki : Do you read books to your baby?

michael : emily reads the baby story every night and sings to her. i read a story to the baby once

titoki : Actually it’s good for the father to talk to the baby too. to get familiar with your voice. to bond with you. don’t read it once, read it everynight. it’s your duty. do you know why kids are closer to their mom? coz the mom talks a lot. dad is like wood. so i hope you can read more to her, sing to her even, it will help to foster a closer ties and relationship. and it helps her to recognise your voice too

michael : but … i don’t want her to be close to me ….

titoki : u are one weird dad. why not?

michael : not until she’s old enough to go to the toilet herself!

titoki : LOL

michael : i’m smart. i’m gonna fucking blog this.

michaelooi  | e-chats  | 13 Comments
April 25, 2006

should I?

I had been asked many hundreds of times before – how did I propose to Emily? Well, let me quench your curiosity once and for all here:

I did it at a mall. It all started as an ordinary outing with Emily, but prior that, had arranged with a horde of Banglas to help me out with a plan (I fucking paid them). Just when we strolled past the center court of the mall at the right moment, the Bangla extras leapt out of nowhere and I started to dance with them ala Hindustan movie style. We sang and rolled on the cold marble floor and ended the ostentatious show by popping the big question “Will you marry me” with a stalk of roses in my hand – that’s how I got her.

Perfect, isn’t it?

elements of surprise – check
public attention – check
uniqueness of event – check
flowers – check
big question – check

If only I can act that ridiculous… As some of you may have already guessed, yes, I made up the whole thing. For those of you who actually dug the whole fictional account above, you ought to have your brain checked.

The fact is, I never proposed. There never was any decision whether to get hitched. I guess it’s a mutual thing… you know, we kinda saw us spending the rest of our lives getting old together. And then, it sort of happened, just like that – we tied the knot (there wasn’t even any wedding reception).

Bland and unromantic, some of you may say. But for us (for me), romanticism is just a matter of individual perception. When you’re really in love, everything is romantic. It’s not really about flowers and wines and posh restaurants (you get the idea). Those are just some common paradigm made popular by the movies and romance novels. Like platform shoes and hairspray in the 70’s, these exclusive practices became the very ‘in’ thing amongst the ladies (only that this stays evergreen)… and are often used as a standard to stereotype men, if he’s … ~~~oooooh!~~~ romannntic.

And because of strayed perceptions like this, most of us guys are forced to jump into the big bandwagon of deceit, where we’ll have to fork out fuckloads of moolah just to get an evening right, to placate the girl in the mood to say the much expected “yes”. No you can’t simply propose “Will you marry me?” in an eat-all-you-can greasy BBQ outlet wearing a wife beater exposing your double patch of furry armpit. You’ll be rejected flat because you’re “not sincere” enough.

Get this straight:
you in your comfy clothes behind an inexpensive setting of atmosphere = NOT SINCERE
you with wine and stars in the sky, with white rose and a poetic prose = YES SINCERE

which makes it:
years of supposedly being in love together = unimportant, negligible

what the fuck??

Sadly, that’s what happening in today’s world. Some people expect things to happen, and when they don’t get the romantic proposal they wanted, they get upset unnecessarily over the relationship. The question is, shouldn’t they be looking at the bigger picture instead? Like, a treasurable relationship instead of just a good proposal to determine everything?

But what do I know… I’m just an engineer. My mind is smudged with transistors and capacitors, my heart’s stiffened with years of radiation from the monitor. In that case, I’ll just let you people judge – if the act of proposing is compulsory for a guy, even when one’s already been together for yearrrrssss and mutually decided to be each other’s life partner (and more important to that, what if the guy did not propose? Should a girl just fucking dump him? Should the act of proposing be a gating criteria for one to accept a marriage?)

Maybe we should just take a shot to change the society here… hmmmmmmm…

michaelooi  | thoughts  | 22 Comments
April 24, 2006

green tea madness

Just the other day, I saw this piece of advert at Tesco – a picture of a couple of yokels wearing this asphyxiating grin, each holding a stick of toothbrush with some squeezed paste on it. Green tea flavored toothpaste, it said. Yeah, green tea flavored toothpaste. (WTF!?!?)

I mean, can you believe that? Green tea toothpaste. If that isn’t bizarre. Like, how many kinds of product have you noticed out there that are ‘green tea flavored’ or has an exclusive variant of green tea? Innumerable. First, it was just the food. Green tea flavored mooncakes, green tea flavored biscuits, you name it. Then came the scents. Green tea fragrances, green tea scented shampoo, green tea scented hair gels. People just can’t get enough of green tea… that they have to apply it on themselves. (there’s once, I picked up a female friend wearing green tea fragrance… almost made me dive out of the car)

And now, even our toothpastes are green tea flavored. Goddamn. I wonder what next… green tea flavored condoms? Hell yeah girls, fellating your fuck buddy wearing a condom will never be the same ever again… for you’re gonna get pinkier by savoring heaps of anti-oxidants from the green tea goodness on the french cap… all the while giving your partner the much desired sexual gratification. No more expensive Japanese restaurants.

How about toilet paper that is made of recycled green tea residues? Unlike any other regular toilet paper, it’ll not just only make your poo part from your puckering asshole, but it’ll also leave a trail of aromatic green tea microscopic lint around your ass – creating a haven of Zen down there, absorbing positive Chi and balancing your Fengshui (shits like that). Imagine how delightful and delectable it would be for your girlfriend/boyfriend, if they were to ever engage an Australian kiss with you, and suddenly to discover the unexpected green tea surprise.

Flex your own imagination, people.

I wonder what’s with the obsession about this whole green tea business. Why not something else? Like beef jerky flavored toothpaste (that’s at least better than green fucking tea)… or beer flavored mooncake? Why can’t a tea just be a tea? Why would anyone opt to have their hair smell like… like… green tea in favor of those nice floral scents? Is this some kind of a sinister biological plot by the Japanese to take over the world? Or are the aliens behind this?

Nobody knows. Only time will tell, whether we’ll all get over it… or are we gonna evolve into some exotic herbivores that eat and shit green tea.

michaelooi  | what I saw  | 18 Comments
April 22, 2006

homer

I had to help Emily clip her toe nails today. This whole knocked up thing sort of made her experienced how it felt like to be Homer Simpson… where your belly’s so big, you can’t even see your own crotch…

michaelooi  | 2-of-us  | 12 Comments