January 10, 2006


For don’t know how many thousand fucketh times, my pair of shorts is split right beneath the ball region again. I think my ball-skin is either too rough or abrasive. It’s eating away my expensive pants and shorts like a hungry termite. Cheebye.

Any skin specialist out there? Do I need to apply lotion on my bollocks to smoothen it or something? Masque on my balls? SK-II? Sandpaper?

[The signs are eminent. I’m getting old. First the constipation and now corrosive balls… sheesh… I wonder what next, grey pubic hairs?]

michaelooi  | rantings  | 

22 Comments to “signs”

  1. souplad says:

    “It’s eating away my expensive pants and shorts like a hungry termite. Cheebye”… its cheebye or ya balls eating ya pants?

    anyway… its ya perspiration plus the abrasion caused by walking ……or god knows what u have been doing… rubbing against a tree or some twats….

    that weakens the fabric .. dun blame it on the balls….

    it’s a sin to blame them

  2. JDream says:

    I think it’s due to the quality of the material your shorts are made of. Try wearing something made of Spandex next time.

    Either that or your balls are growing larger :P

  3. chris says:

    Not corrosive balls lah. With age, your balls will succumb to the power of gravity, hence the weight and strain on the middle of the shorts….

  4. michaelooi says:

    souplad – if perspiration plus the chafing is the factor, explain why am I not seeing any splits in my armpit region…

    jdream – Hmmm… maybe. Or perhaps I should switch to sarongs. Like, it’s kinda convenient for a quickie… though very out of style…. hmmmmm

    chris – Then, old ladies ought to expect their sagging tits to grind a hole through their blouse? Come on man!

  5. Yee Hou says:

    Grey underwear!!

  6. Primrose says:

    Err…Incredible Hulk?

  7. Kim says:

    I think it’s actually the fact that you might be putting on a bit of weight so the seams cannot tahan.

  8. kumar says:

    Maybe it’s time to remove ‘em balls.. :-p

  9. michaelooi says:

    yee hou – OOoooh!! Thanks for the enlightenment! That’s something i don’t know…

    primrose – Not yet. He’s not agitated yet…

    kim – Yeah, that serpent has been putting on weight alright. If I were to take a piss at some alley, might probably scare them stray cats shitless…

    kumar – And if you have a popped shirt button you’re gonna disembowel yourself? Riiiiiiigght.

  10. souplad says:

    dat’s why on a second thought…. the perspiration and abrasion are probably the aftermath of some kinda kinky sutra stunts?

  11. Beefstew says:

    Trousers are not for you anymore. You should wear Scottish kilt (not saronglah, not stylish enough despite Zang Toi wore it). The best thing about it is traditionally, you don’t need to wear underwear, let your balls swing freely.

  12. zbjernak says:

    perhaps ur pants are too baggy, or u wear it below your waist-line..you know… “londek” i think tht is how it is spell in malay… hehehehhe

    or u have been squatting without pulling your pants…

    anyhow… tht pic… looks disgusting…

  13. michaelooi says:

    souplad – If there was to be any sutra stunts performed, I wouldn’t have been moving around in the first place. I would have been sleeping soundly on the bed. Naked.

    beefstew – That’s a good idea. I always enjoyed the feeling of letting my balls swinging pendulously like a free hanging fruit. Oh yeah bebeh…

    zbjernak – Disgusting? What’s so disgusting about a split pants, you sissy…

  14. mahagurusia says:

    dude, your balls must be getting too droopy and the ding donging around must have caused more friction than usual. Try getting a sport bra, I meant a better supportive under garment. Otherwise plastic surgery might be required. Ouch! :-)

  15. Vincent says:

    Ducktape… worked for McGuyver rite? ;)

  16. Imran says:

    Stop staring at all the humongous tits that passes you by, and stop fantasizing about them. Maybe then you will have less hard-ons and as a result less holes in pants.

  17. michaelooi says:

    mahagurusia – My balls may be rough, but it’s lookin good bebeh. Me need no plastic surgery.

    vincent – You meant duct tape right? Coz obviously, I’m so not into ducks.

    imran – Then? Stare the flat ones? And leave the good ones for you? Wah manyak pandai aa lu…
    If my hard-on can tear a baggy shorts like that, I’d be in a circus spinning hula hoops with my schlong…

  18. Laynie says:

    Way to go for taking the picture whilst still wearing it :)

  19. ShaolinTiger says:

    I have this on all my jeans…bah fixed some of them like 3 times, what to do, balls to big :D

  20. oliviasy says:

    eh eh eh… my hubby’s shorts oso like dat lah! :P lubang lubang at the same place. had to take him go shopping for new pants, otherwise he rather keep wearing shorts wif lubangs LOL

  21. michaelooi says:

    laynie – I’m talented.

    ST – I guess we macho people have to put up with the fact that our balls are abrasive in nature… it’s an inherent feature in us. Rub them together, we’re gonna create sparks bebeh

    olivia – Your hubby belonged to the same club as us awesome people. You did a great job in selecting your life partner. *pats*

  22. k. says:

    This pic is gross. Maybe you should try staples,in the pants and your balls.

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