October 30, 2005

the wedgie

I experienced it AGAIN. The feeling of wearing a thong. I’ve blogged about my first accidental discovery before … and very well learnt the lesson not to wear a loose underwear to work ever again.

But this time, it didn’t happen at work. It happened out of sheer randomness. You know, when you’re very sure you’re not gonna make the same stupid boner you’ve been reminding yourself not to make ? Then WHAM – it just happens.

This time, the fault lies on my loose shorts. You see, I was in my casual attire – a pair of bermuda shorts and my flip flops. Was doing something fairly important when I realized that my shorts are shifting lower at the waistline. Well, that was because I had heaps of stuffs in my pockets, you know, keys and shits like that. The weight of those stuffs kept pulling my shorts lower mooning out my underwear-ed ass.

Because I do not fancy exhibiting my bum to the public like those ah lians, I took some effort to pull my shorts back up each time it slides down my ass. So it was kinda like a routine thingy, me pulling my shorts every few minutes or so. But there was this one time, I pulled the wrong part the whole thing. Instead of pulling the sliding shorts, I made a mistake and pulled MY UNDERWEAR!

And because I pulled too hard, it sort of created a nasty wedgie right in the center of my buttcrack. If you can imagine the situation, my underwear is now higher than my shorts and my buttcheeks felt cold like they were naked like that. If you remember Marky Mark and his infamous Calvin Klein underwear advert, yeah … it’s almost the same except, I’m fucking doing it with a wedgie !

My reflex was fast, I hopped to a secluded corner and even up the whole situation by doing some frantic tuck-in’s. In the process, I also surveyed if there was any reputation damage been done. Thank god, no. I couldn’t imagine if the entire blooper were to be witnessed by a kid … could probably scar that little guy’s childhood and turn him into a deranged serial killer or something.

I was unlucky for the indignity that happened, and a little bit lucky that nobody saw it.

michaelooi  | happenings  | 

7 Comments to “the wedgie”

  1. alicia says:

    haha.. get a pouch to keep ur keys and stuffs like those taokeh at coffee shops lar… :P

  2. Primrose says:

    Woi! What’s this reference to the thong and butt cheek, ha? Ha? Ha?? Like girl only. :P

  3. Lainie says:

    it’s kinda surprising how guys are sometimes shyer than girls about wedgies :P

    Just pull only lah, who cares how many eyes water after that

  4. put3put4 says:

    Haha! have you lifted your ass to suit the odd buttcramp?
    I used to renew underwear frequently to prevent my frequent frontier hand-hovers in order to adjust the gravity.

  5. michaelooi says:

    alicia – If I’m a VCD seller or a loanshark, I would have done that. Else, a pouch is just as chintzy as wearing an afro wig for me …

    primrose – Errmm… all human beings have buttcheeks, ok ? It’s not a gender thing…

    lainie – Guys have balls. A wedgie isn’t as simple to us as it looks. It’s .. it’s… kooky down there…

    put3put4 – I have had cramps everywhere except the butt. You have cramps on your butt meh ? Go see a doctor dude … who knows it might lead to something else (turning into transvetite ? heheh)

  6. HolyCow says:

    Yeee haaa.. Happy Deepavali… !!!

  7. Amber Amethryne says:

    Hahaha… what was funny!! :D

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