September 30, 2005

shrimp cake story

I posted this story before in the forum… but I’m posting it here again because today’s a very special day…


there’s a Filipino maid. she works for a chinese family. she doesn’t speak malay or chinese .. so, she usually converse in English with her employers.

one day, the mistress wants her to buy a piece of shrimp cake (belacan) from a nearby store. So, she goes on her way to comply with her mistress’ request — to buy a piece of belacan

But she has a problem. The shopkeeper doesn’t understand what she wanted to buy when she told him “shrimp cake”. She tries her best to show him with all sorts of hand signals… but to no success.

Then, the Filipino maid has an idea. She sticks her hand into her private part … and scrubs it against the smelliest part of her labium…. then sticks her tainted finger under the shopkeeper’s nostril.

Immediately, the shopkeeper knows what she wanted to buy “OOOOOOOOOOO BELACAN SI BOOOH ? Say lar early early ..”


Story courtesy of my late old man (told to me when I was barely 16). Today’s his birthday… and I missed that bugger.

michaelooi  | nonsense  | 

17 Comments to “shrimp cake story”

  1. m@ri says:

    HapPy BiRtDay Uncle Ooi!U have a good kid there… ;p

  2. Esther says:

    Aw. That’s such a dirty dirty joke.

  3. Gregenz says:

    Cheers to him dude!

  4. Early Stage Beef Stew says:

    Yesterday was his birthday and you shouldn’t go like one story. Maybe a marathon of stories he used to told you, that would be nice.

    Erm…Happy birthday, uncle…

  5. fish fish says:

    Belacan smell?? Is this story a true one or not?

  6. michaelooi says:

    m@ri – I hope he gets that wish. Coz he had already bitten the dust a couple years ago. heheh…

    beef stew – Well, the problem is, he has a lazy son. Whatudu…

    fish fish – Errmmmm … this story of course is not true lar… but there’s some significant truth in it… go figure lar…

  7. Averdim says:

    something tells me i’d have loved uncle ooi’s company…

    rock on uncle ooi and uncle ooi’s son.

  8. m@ri says:

    Sorry dear… I missed out that part. You must miss him so much huh? Don’t worry, he knows how much you love him ;)

  9. bongkersz says:

    haha! Bau belacan.. lol i remembered this guy, used to stay next door, that time i was a small kid.. he’s in his twenties.. told me bout this.. something like ‘pukek indu bau belacan’ translated as ‘girl’s private part smells like belacan… ‘ lol lol lol ..~~

  10. hokkien lang says:

    maikel ,
    i wonder if that filipino maid ask to buy ‘sotong kering’ or ‘salted fish’?
    what she will do?

  11. KY says:

    macam bapa macam anak.. hehe

  12. megabigblur says:

    *goes to bathroom*

    *comes back 2 minutes later*

    NO IT DOES NOT SMELL LIKE BELACAN! you people never bathe ar?

  13. souplad says:

    hokkein lang: then she rubs her fingers between her toes lor.

    belacan? i bet she neber bathe for a least a month.

    ehh… different XX chromos tasted and smell differently…. hehe.

  14. Silencers says:

    Now I know where all this michael ooi-ness came from. Happy Bday uncle :)

  15. hokkien lang says:

    souplad ;
    i thought she take out hers 7 days old panties to that towkey…
    ha… ha… ha…

  16. jo says:

    Ha ha, not even funny. Perhaps you can dig up some “funny” story about smelly crotches.

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