September 22, 2005

the tragic corridor

There’s this corridor of death at my workplace. It is named as such because nobody actually likes it. It is long and narrow, and it can hardly fit 2 pedestrians walking side by side. As if it’s not bad enough, there are also approximately half dozen of rooms adjacent to it … and you can imagine how complicated things can get :

1) whenever there’s a blimp the size of a garbage truck trudging down this corridor, the whole stretch of route will turn into one way direction only.

2) whenever a meeting dismisses, the whole place would be congested like there’s a rock concert right in the middle of the office.

3) whenever someone’s holding his/her cup of favorite beverage and exit from one of the rooms (which is a pantry) into the corridor, spill accidents are bound to happen.

You get the idea.

And then, there’s this part right at the middle of this corridor, that branches to the lavatories. It has a short vestibule leading towards 3 rooms – the gents, ladies and unfortunates. Now this area, is a very famous “kawasan kemalangan” (accident prone zone). More often than not, you’ll get people colliding into each other when one’s rushing for a leak and the other ambling out from a relief.

For most of us who are already familiar with the corridor, we would just practice extra caution whenever we walk past this spot. You wouldn’t want to accidentally walk into a bloke or something. That’s just plain gay.

But 2 days ago, I’ve forgotten to be careful. That’s because I was very close to wetting my pants and all my bodily functions were basically controlled by my bladder. I was walking very fast approaching that corner… and was already starting to hallucinate an urinal right in front of me. Then suddenly… WHAM ! No I didn’t collide into anything. Well… almost.

It was a pair of tits belonged to a tomboy… that appeared right out of that very corner. Scared the shit out of me. I don’t know what the hell was wrong with her tits. They were big and nasty… and they defied gravity. I kid you not. Somehow at that split second, I only saw her pair of tits bouncing out from that corner BEFORE I was even able to see her face. Her humongous tits were extending far out like an awning (that was able to provide shelter for motorcyclists on rainy days…). And because they were so huge like that, I couldn’t seem to find any rational explanation behind that anti-gravity effect… but to only speculate that she’s probably donning a pair of helium filled bra (if there’s even such a thing…).

Anyway, upon having that spasmodic visual contact, I gave out a shriek out of reflex and I dodged towards the back to avert myself from colliding into her twin Hindenberg shaped tits ala the Matrix style – and prevented myself from getting a tragic flip and a badass concussion. By the time I gained back my composure, that tomboy was already standing in front of me… and she looked dumbfucked over my reaction. (hhyeah… I sorta overreacted). We stared at each other for about 1.5 seconds… before she eventually offered an apology. I gave a quick acknowledgment, and scampered into the toilet for the ultimate relief.

Now that I’m recalling back every moment of it … I wonder if her tits would have actually exploded and caught up with a big inferno if she were to stumble into a man lighting a ciggy…

And she could have used a caution sign or something… eg: AWAS MUATAN PANJANG… Her tits are a hazard to the public.

michaelooi  | happenings  | 

14 Comments to “the tragic corridor”

  1. elloz says:

    helium wont burn…. :/
    hidrogen does!

  2. totoro says:

    wahahahaha, a long story about kap-liu and tits… u need blind spot mirrors la.

  3. gregenz says:

    DUDEEEE you actually “almost” bumped into a tomboy with boobies?? fuck when will it ever be my luck to experience what you encountered!! all the tom boys i know and bumped into are “airports” man…i kinda have a thing for them..hahaha! wei..they can be rough and act as a guy but some of them got character man!!

  4. rootified says:

    i thought normally tom boy have flat tits one? how come someone with such a huge tits will make you relate her with a tom boy?
    she’s wearing jeans+basketball jersey+baseball cap+converse kicks?
    or… she come out from the male toilet? a half-baked shemale with overstuffed fake tits but havent remove his penis yet?

  5. plink says:

    …twin Hindenberg…big inferno …

    Oh the HUMANITY!!

  6. michaelooi says:

    elloz – Alright, I made a mistake. So, it’s whatever gas that’s inside Hindenberg. Thanks for pointing out. (my general knowledge is equivalent to a bag of vegetables)

    totoro – You know what I need ? I need money.

    gregenz – Eh, if you wished for some luck, why don’t you wish for yourself to bump into some big tittied instead ? Why has it got to be tomboy lah ?

    rootified – Gut feel. Her hairstyle, her face and the way she walked… kangkang like that… hard to explain. It’s like an instant recognition thingy.

    plink – Yeah her pair of hindenberg jugs are scary. But there are pros though. You can actually hide under her tits on a rainy day and never get wet.

  7. Jase says:

    Well, the dual airbags could offer a higher safety measure for people bumping into her… :P

  8. Avatar says:

    “We stared at each other for about 1.5 seconds …”
    So you stared at her tits? or her?

  9. Averdim says:

    hahaha!! rock on wei!
    when u said tomboy, as in, face totally tak boleh pakai wan la?

  10. gregenz says:

    mike, normal girls either blush or they have a feminine reaction mah…a tomboys reaction can be different..just a fetish hahahaha!! just like to tease them!

  11. Primrose says:

    Wah seh! A tomboy who’s voluptuous ah? Rare case wor. So can you imagine if she pang pua liap or not? Lau nuar or not?

  12. MorpheusX says:

    Michael.. you should sound the alarm next time you are near the Kawasan Kemalangan mar….. haiz… you know like lorries when the are going into an unseen corner.. they will horn once ( mean i am here) then horn twice( i am coming)….

    Good idea ehh……..Or you want to test the Hindenburg and see if its for real wan….kekekek

  13. michaelooi says:

    jase – Errmmm… no thanks. That dual airbags looked more dangerous than anything else.

    avatar – Of course no ler… But I think her tits are staring at me (should be staring at the ground abiding the law of gravity)

    gregenz – Well, if a tomboy’s cute, I would have concurred with what you’ve said. But the problem is, this tomboy looked like Beano.

    primrose – Errmmm… It would be catastrophic.

    morpheus – Alarm ? I think I need a crowbar to knock her pair of jugs out ! Illegal architectural extension !

  14. hokkien lang says:

    i can’t imagen if you really hit that chick.. er, i mean that tomboi.
    with a air…bag at her chest….

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