July 2, 2005

“War of the Worlds” (2005)

Finally, the famous “War of the Worlds”. Can’t remember much of its story, except some mild memories of squid looking monsters terrorizing streets of some city … I think I’ve watched the cartoon version of it when I was a kid.

Never mind that. I watched the movie version today. So, what do I think of it ? Because it’s a Steven Spielberg movie, I would say the movie is a flop. I had put up a high expectation of it … and was literally filled with disappointment when the movie ended. As simple as that.

details (spoiler alert) :

As you all may have already known, this movie is all about some aliens from Mars trying to take over our planet. Story focuses on the adventure of a crane operator (Tom Cruise) and his kids surviving through the entire ‘invasion’ – which was pre-planned millions of years ago by the aliens.

How did they do it ? By burying their 3 legged spaceships (called “tripods”) underground before the dawn of civilization … and reactivated it back to fuck the whole world when Tom Cruise was about to have a bad time with his teenage son in the 21st century. Sounds like an awesome plot, doesn’t it ? Well, I don’t think so.

I was thinking, if they’re planning for an invasion, or extermination of mankind, wouldn’t it be easier for them aliens to fuck with us humans while we’re still dwelling in caves thousands of years ago ? But no. Instead, they would wait until we have all the gadgets to fuck back with them… and took the trouble to jam our electronics before rising up from the ground to wreak all havoc upon mankind. That’s smart…

Some part of the movie reminded of “Independence Day” – you know, the aliens appearing out of nowhere in America thrilling everyone. Just when they (Americans) were gaping by the prowess of their awesomeness, then wham… the aliens started to mow everyone down with their plasma/sonic/whatever weapons. I have to admit, that part of the movie was kinda fun to watch. It gave me the feeling that the world’s gonna end… though it’s only occurring at some ghetto neighborhood somewhere around America (no high rise building, no nothing).

Come think of it, why do aliens like to cause troubles only in America ? (and oversized mutated monsters in Tokyo) ? Why can’t that happen in somewhere around places like Air Itam in Penang … or perhaps, Jonker Street in Melaka ? Sheesh.

And when Tom Cruise discovered that he’s in deep shit, he quickly bailed his neighborhood to seek refuge at somewhere safer – his ex mother-in-law’s house in Boston. (he probably thinks that his mother-in-law is nastier than the aliens). Talking about aliens, I’ve noticed that the word “alien” was not being mentioned even once in this movie … as if everyone was trying hard not to say the magic word. Like when Tom’s teenage son actually asked him where did those “things” come from ? He only answered him – they’re something from “somewhere”… to which, his dumbass son thought he meant Europe.

I was thinking, why can’t he just say – “THOSE ARE ALIENS FROM THE OUTER FUCKING SPACE YOU DOLT !!!!”.

So, the tripods would go around toasting everyone’s ass and picking up housewives with tentacles and imprison them for snacks later. Not much battle scenes, but a lot of scenes of those tripods going around causing destruction. Unlike “Independence Day”, there wasn’t a feel of unity at all here, nor was there any ridiculous heroic tales to tell about. Oh, except the scene where Tom Cruise actually stuffed up a couple of grenades into the puckering sphincter of the tripod’s ass (yes, the spaceship has an anus)… causing it to puke and explode with diarrhea before dying off.

Just when I started to wonder if the movie had enough time to get to a good ending … suddenly, all the tripods started to move awkwardly and died off… Some that still stood, would suddenly lost its shield and eventually end up getting shot by human soldiers. That was when the credit rolled out telling the audience that the aliens had died off due to their lack of immune against the microorganism in our atmosphere … and the invasion failed. We won.

I was like “WHAT THE FUCK !? THE ALIENS ACTUALLY GOT AIDS AND LOSE THE BATTLE ??”. As odd as it may have already sound, the intelligent aliens that were already capable of building spaceships millions of years ago, didn’t seem to be able to figure out that their immune was weak against our Earth’s atmosphere … That’s kinda hard to swallow isn’t it ? It’s a choking hazard.

This movie contains a lot of major flaws. And that’s the problem with it. No shit that it has plenty of CG effects and some good drama as well, but… it’s the contradicting plot that actually spoilt it. I’d say don’t waste the money, get a pDVD.

michaelooi  | movie reviews  | 

39 Comments to ““War of the Worlds” (2005)”

  1. surfnux says:

    Yah, the movie is crap. The squid like monster or spacecraft lost its shield just like that or could it be because of the crows? hoho or the alien sucks too much blood already. The squid sucks blood and burst out blood. I think can call it bloodsucker squid monster from ‘somewhere’. hoho

  2. pikey says:

    Actually the movie ended correctly cos based on the novel written by HG Wells (1898), the aliens died from our own earth bacteria infection. The classic version of it (1953) also has this same ending. If Spielberg change the ending, it won’t be called War of the Worlds anymore.

  3. Cyrene says:

    there’re 2 more:
    1. on his way running back home, people around him was shot and shattered by the tripods, there wasnt anyone on the street alive accept tom cruise alone who eventually made his way back home (???)

    2. when the daughter and tom cruise himself were caught, up on the tripod, those who got caught only started pulling tom cruise from the so-called tripod’s anus =P and he got saved. (but they nvr helped those who got killed before him???)

    yea, the movie sucked. tom cruise is still cute though ;)

  4. crn says:

    wahlauyeh.. can u give me the conclusion?worth it or not to spend money on this movie?

  5. miruL says:

    Sometimes we should think of ourself LESS CLEVER than other people in order to make OURSELVES happy.

    Maybe that’s why you’re always stressed out. You always think that you’re more clever than other people.

    Stress can make you look older. Really dont want to add that to your face, right?

  6. megabigblur says:

    Listened to the old Orson Welles radio drama version once. It was pretty good. But same problem as this movie: aliens attack America only. We need someone to make a local version more syiok =D

  7. michaelooi says:

    surfnux – Lack of immune to bacterias. Macam kena AIDS ler tuu…

    pikey – I know. I was just making a fun out of it. The original “War Of The Worlds” has a big flaw itself. And this movie has a rather abrupt ending…
    I think Spielberg could have slightly modified the movie to have a more solid storyline … so that it doesn’t have that goofy feel.
    (like, come on, we’ve been drilling grounds for centuries, and couldn’t they tell if we;ve so many piles of spaceship underneath our feet ?)

    cyrene – Tom Cruise hero maa… Oh and there’a part where all the electronics were actually jammed by EMC ? How come that electronic video cam corder is still running ?? That’s a big blunder…

    crn – If you’re into mindless action type of movie … this movie should be ok for you.

    miruL – Appreciate your wisdom. Maybe you’re smart or something but, just want to tell you that – I’m stressed out because of pressure in work… not because I think I’m smart. And by telling me this, i think you think you’re smart… are you any stressed out about this ? Ponder a bit dude.
    You’ll probably understand this better when you grow up.

  8. kervin says:

    Dad: Oh my fucking god lets just head to Boston and see mum, on the way you get hysterical with the kids and they all act like crap and somehow everyone in the family survives, happy ending.

    Son: I want to see the alien, I want to fight. Oh how did I get to Boston without a scratch while everyone else got torched, pulped and turned into human fertilizer.

    Daughter: Screaaaammmmm………. Act like a tiny irritating bug, I want mummy.

    Aliens: Achoo, oops forgot to get my flue shots.

  9. michaelooi says:

    kervin – Wow, you actually did that in less than a paragraph.

    megabigblur – The original sci-fi novel was written by an European… supposedly an event that took place in Europe. This movie is an American version of WotW.

  10. abyss says:

    ahh.. tx to u now i kno y dey lose the shield when they r winning.So it was bacteris huh..I was still thinking after the movie, no idea wat killed em.. neway, thou the movie din leave a mark in mia heart, tom cruise does!!!.. TOM!!!!!……>hehe<..

  11. zbjernak says:

    wasted the talent of tom and fanning…
    good actor, bad storylines…

    may god bless spielberg…guessed he is out of idea…

  12. m@ri says:

    Waste of my money. I expected more out of Spielberg. But wake up girls, Tom is so old and haggard now.I think too much humping with Katie ;p Hehehehe!

  13. moo_t says:

    Aiyor, looks like Spielberg didn’t watch “Earth: the final conflict”.

    Just copy the plot lar :
    – Alien draining “life-force” from human but die because human are “polluted”. (not because of stupid virus/germs)
    – Alien wait for human “multiply ” so they can have a “eat all you can” buffet. (see, so simple)
    – The Alien should “leave” instead of dying of stupid virus, after the found human(blood,flesh, life form) taste lousy. And they pick up ALL politician outer space to find out that how corrupt a human being can be. ;)

  14. megabigblur says:

    I suggest turning to HP Lovecraft. Instead of scary tentacled monsters coming from outer space, we can have scary tentacled monsters coming from the depths of the sea.

  15. michaelooi says:

    abyss – You’re welcome.

    zbjernak – I don’t think Tom’s a good actor. You know who would be a better actor ? The Rock. Man, I would love to see The Rock kick them alien’s ass.

    m@ri – Same here. Spielberg has been a flop lately. He has certainly lost his touch… (A.I. sucked big time too)

    moo_t – I think they’ve overdone alien themed movies. It’s time for us to move to something new …

  16. Early stage beef stew says:

    Well, talking about doing it locally… Which building are the aliens going to attack? Scene of shooting down Petronas Twin Tower will have your movie banned…Fucking sure of that…Our censorship board will definitely banned this one. Their perception is and always be….is Watch the sex element scene and the audiences will go out raping everybody at sightas soon as they walk out from that cinema…

    I always been wondering…are the staff in the scissors department are all suffer from early stage menopause and impotent???

  17. michaelooi says:

    megabigblur – I never read novels ler … isk isk

    esbs – And instead of learning how to have a normal sex life, the people in Malaysia are starting to rape farm animals or flash to factory girls in Darth Vader uniform…(like…come on, i’m sure you guys have heard news like that…)

  18. killershik says:

    screw war of the worlds…..!

    im going for war of the worlds tmr wit my gf tho

  19. lex says:

    The movie was a beautifully well-done failure. I guess they couldn’t hire someone to give the script a simple once-over to spot all the obvious flaws because all the money went to CGI.

    The EMP flaw is so bad my 11 year old protested loudly at all the electronics suddenly working. Add to that all the sucky junk like the airplane burning but none of the neighborhood being set on fire, the constant inexplicable open road in front of the van on the highway and at the airplane crash site.

    Let’s face it. Aliens not having immunity to germs isn’t a bad angle. The scriptwriters made us groan in disbelief because they left this ending at the same time as they introduced this STUPID idea that the spaceships were in the ground for tens of thousands of years. If they had gone with an updated version of HG Wells where the aliens land, that would have been fine. But no. The aliens came here eons ago and planted their ships and waited? For what?

    Then we end up with the aliens apparently like the Bush Administration. All this planning and no plan to secure the peace?

    If the movie was emotionally engaging, few of us would have noticed the flaws. But the movie failed miserably. So we noticed all the crap.

  20. Jay says:

    You guys, all you have to say is negative comments, My dad and i went to see this move and we were stunned with the amazing visual effects and believable acting/realism in human nature,…civil unrest. I thought going to this movie was worth every penny, sure the movie has some minor flawes, but its a MOVIE and is WAS entertaining. Spielberg’s interpretation of war of the worlds was for the most part correct. The movie took place in america and was focused on a common man (tom cruise) but in the movie it is clearly stated this was happening all over the world when the dirty old man said that “The japanse figued out thier weakness, why cant we”…… This one of the best movies i have seen in a long time, You don’t have to OVER critisize it, The movie wasn’t mindless. It’s is a-lot better than a-lot of “alien-thriller” movies i have seen. Personally I thought the acting was excellent even if oyu don’t like tom cruise, the actors accuratly portayed their reactions to the situations and thier roles in the movie. and yes A.I. sucked so much, I didn’t even watch the whole thing………….

  21. apone says:

    The movie had it’s flaws… The story line is far out dated. Yes its a classic in the sense of a classic and you have to respect that a story written of 1oo years ago is going to have its flaws.
    I agree… aliens waiting till we have gainsed a sort of upper hand on the technologically and in numbers is a very dumb idea. But in in the 1870s or even in the 1930s it may have seemed still logical before nukes, and our current state of defense.
    Now… I guess Spielburg was trying to make his 05 special effects summer movie megabucks film to please the studios. Stephen… special effects are only good if you can back them up with a believable storyline. As a matter of fact that was my problem with ID4… a computer virus in that film and a bio virus in this one?
    It may have worked if we’d of looked at that facts. I was very disappointed in the scene when Cruise was in the basement with the crazy guy and he says that the japanese had taken down the aliens… I thought… hey maybe they used bioweapons like anthrax or something like that… (I write horror stories) but no. They just caught the everyday cold.
    They could have gone a lot farther with this story. The constant hiding, the running, and the overkill shots of the tripods vaporizing people (also very stupid) why didn’t they just stay in orbit and like in ID4 use a massive weapon to hit our populated areas? I give it one thumb up for brainless entertainment, one thumb down because spielburg you should know better!

  22. War of the Worlds – Half a classic?

    This was *almost* a great movie, I mean really really great, a classic, for the first 2 acts, the first half it was gripping, emotional, scary, involving and just great to watch (Especially on a THX screen!).

  23. Ok first off this movie was unbelievable. Second of all, i would agree with the fact that this movie had some flaws. A question that is now raised in my mind, after watching the movie yesterday, is where in the hell did the lightning that transported the aliens into the machines come from? I mean come on all the people on the streets did was sit there and look up into the sky. I think it would have added a better sci fi feeling to have had scientists look through a telescope of some sort and see Huge Ass Alien Space ships everywhere around earth sending down these “lightning bolts”.

  24. killershik says:

    Brian Roberts,

    where were u when the part they explained there were these little capsule thgs transported thru the constant lightning eh, ur gf giving u a ns blowjob? D`OH

    ok, i finally watched da movie and we enjoyed it with occasional complaints (frm me) abt tis so fake, thts so not possible. ive heard some comments abt the storyline’s lame, abt how the alien suddenly died out due to our earth inconducive/ or alien life-threatening atmosphere but SS is jus following the novel so i cld live wit tht.

    i enjoyed the beginning of the movie, gave me slight chill when alien emerged and start splitting the city(ies), the sound effect and vis eff deserve some praise. i dont care if its week gross is half of tht spiderman’s as long as i feel its worth it. i wldnt say tis is a superb one but i wont feel my time & money is wasted.

    cant believe im posting tis in someones blog.

  25. wattz says:

    What I still don’t understand is what’s with the red alien landscape? Basically, their purpose of invading Earth was to suck out our blood and redecorate the land with red roots and gore. That’s the pure definition of evil from above I suppose. Anything in the book mention that?

    Very curious..

  26. Nabu San says:

    Sooo true, the movie is SHITE. It’s like ‘Signs’ all over again… Very original Spielberg, hope you choke on your Oscar – which you’re blatantly gonna get…

  27. Apone is gay says:

    Apone your gay the purpose of the invation was for human blood. Maybe that’s why they didn’t blow up all the people. Ever think of that smart one.

  28. 宇宙戦争 観てきました。

    War Of The Worlds 大作だけあって飽きずに最後までみることができ…

  29. Anonymous says:

    The movie was good. Though some parts were freaky.

  30. darwich says:

    this movie is meaning less and i has no morals. ending is shitty was expecting very exciting ending

  31. Sunil says:

    Cyrene wrote:

    there’re 2 more:
    1. on his way running back home, people around him was shot and shattered by the tripods, there wasnt anyone on the street alive accept tom cruise alone who eventually made his way back home (???)

    2. when the daughter and tom cruise himself were caught, up on the tripod, those who got caught only started pulling tom cruise from the so-called tripod’s anus =P and he got saved. (but they nvr helped those who got killed before him???)

    yea, the movie sucked. tom cruise is still cute though ;)

    Actually the people were not helping Cruise…infact when Cruise was being pulled up he grabbed onto the army dude. The army dude called for helping and the others were trying to save his life.

    I thought the movie was great except for the last bit and maybe it would have been nice to see what was going on in the rest of the movie. But people, its meant to be a little bit unrealistic, i mean how can we judge how aliens would invade our planet because they haven’t yet. I give it thumbs up because it was entertaining and thats enough for me.

  32. cazy-lites says:

    I think you guys are desecting the movie a bit too much. If you just sit back and relax and let the little mistakes fly, you would enjoy it a lot more. When you are not looking for flaws, you will have a great experience.

  33. spearhead says:

    What the hell? Can’t we just enjoy movies anymore? Do we have to pick them apart? Yeah, yeah, so the movie has flaws. I dare anyone to name a movie that doesn’t have flaws. ANY movie. Movies (especially like this one based on a movie written from a book 100 years and more ago, are made purely for entertainment. Do you think people who saw the 1953 version complain about the ending. When they walked out they were scared to shit. So, get off you high horses like you guys know all about films and being critics, turn off your brain (if you have any) and simply sit back with a great bag of popcorn and let yourself be taken away. Keep the serious stuff for the real fucked up world we have. And god knows we’re all fucked in the end anyway.

  34. MILO says:

    Okay, i did enjoy the actions, but the ending was bannanas ridiculous. Seriously i can’t feel the flow of the movie… the storyline was very scattered, here and there. Then TomCruise and Fanning seem to cause me distracted from enjoying the movie.. i think i’d prefer better non-big-timed-celeb casting. Hollow overrated movie… with some pretty faces running here n there, shrieking here and there, and a sucky ending from the producer. Pardon me if i’m wrong, cus i’m having some serious shit stomachache going on throughout the movie;)

  35. Jim says:

    What the fuck is wrong with you people the ending was the best ending for a alien movie ever because god has a plan for the world and his little bugs killed the threat. what you want rambo to fly up its ass like in id4 and blow the shit out of it. ya that be so cool? you fuckers would then just complain that you thought the were indestructable. All the tripods died at once because a billion years ago the flu didnt excist and when they came up it was the black death for them.the aliens arnt from mars either in the movie, the book yes, movie no. Tom also wasnt the only one who survived the intersection sceen a man at the end ran past ray as he was leaning on the wall. signs was gay because the aliens were trying to invade a planet they were alergic to (water) so dont compare signs to this master piece. The aliens mabey used up all the resorses on their planet and came to earth they didnt wait until we had weapons to invade.
    And the comment about toms son being a dumbass for thinking the aliens are from europe… he doesnt know their aliens all hes seen it a bridge blowing up. I have better things to do then to explain why this movie was good because i know most of the people who say it was bad were passed out from smoking and sniffing to much.
    So before you pull apart a sci fi movie telling us what the alien invasion is like because youve experenced it. shut the fuck up consider what you just saw.

  36. michaelooi says:

    hey jim you motherfucker,
    who cares what your sorry hillbilly ass thinks about the movie? For fuck’s sake you can’t even spell “maybe”. That’s how fucked up you are.

    And you said you have better things to do than explain why this movie’s so good? Yeah you’re so smart bitch, to only say that after hammering a few paragraphs of super fucked up malarkeys that nobody’s gonna give a fuck about. Just eat shit and die, moron.

    (man, that’s therapeutic. Hillbilly Jim just made my day)

  37. blackmetal says:

    michaelooi, you owe Jim an apology. Apparently someone lacking intellect cannot think of more foul insults without using the over-used f-word. Jim is stating the truth about the events that transpired in this film.

    It’s ok to scrutinize other’s comments. But michaelooi doesn’t appear to hold that potential. At least not in a civil way. I hope that after you get your high school diploma, you plan on attending a university.

    For the sake of argument, I thought the movie was brilliant.

  38. michaelooi says:

    blackmetal – And I suppose someone with intellect would duly ask the siteowner to reasonably apologize to a hillbilly lout that just clobbered everyone up in his (siteowner’s) own domain…

    I hope you plan on going for a lobotomy soon. You sounded like you’re very ill.

  39. grohllives says:

    Just saw the movie on DVD. Its a collage of ideas from I-Day, Matrix and Signs.

    Just goes to show that most print classics never translate well onto celluloid.

    Still well worth the $3 courtesy of BlockBusters..

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