June 17, 2005

fish n chips

I was having my breakfast with the guys today, when Ted came ambling with a plate of fish n’ chips. Elliot, apparently thrilled with the sight of something he had not seen in ages, remarked:

Elliot : “Wahh… Ted, that’s an awesome piece of chicken chop !”

Alright, anyone with an IQ above 10 knew that whatever on Ted’s plate was anything but a piece of “chicken chop”. I was benign enough to correct Elliot on that…

Me : “Errr… Elliot, that’s not a chicken chop. It’s a plate of fish n’ chips.”

Elliot : “Ouh … it definitely looks like a chicken chop to me…” [laughs hysterically]

Me : “Nooo Elliot you idiot. A chicken chop does not look like this. It looks like your fat face… ”

Kidding. Of course I didn’t say that. That’s just not my style. I was actually more diplomatic than that …

Me : “Elliot… I repeat : That’s a plate of fish n’ chips.”

Elliot : “Alright. So, is it made of chicken meat or something ?”

I almost choked.

Me : “It’s made from the meat of a wild boar…”

Elliot : “You’re joking, right ?”

Me : “It’s called FISH N’ CHIPS goddamnit… what do you think it’s supposed to be made of?? What the hell is wrong with you??”

Elliot : [sheepish grin]

I think he hasn’t got a brain in his noggin. Instead, he has a very big tumor filling the space inside his skull… full of festering pus and rotting cells. Any worm or slug would definitely be more intelligent than him.

michaelooi  | characters  | 

13 Comments to “fish n chips”

  1. ken says:

    Optimistic opinion : Maybe he never seen a fish before.
    Pessimistic opinion : He’s a goddamn freak

  2. strawroot says:

    his brains prob have gone rotten just like the leftover apple in his car. i just realised elliot actually rhymes with idiot.

  3. suanie says:

    Why are you mixing around the freaks in the office? You are the only smart one left?

  4. mikki says:

    Reminds me of Mr.Bean..except,this time ur fren is Mr.Pea Brain *giggle*

  5. michaelooi says:

    ken – I think it’s both.

    strawroot – That’s why I call him Elliot…

    suanie – I’m mixing with everyone. It’s just that smart people don’t have much interesting tales …

    mikki – He doesn’t have a brain. It’s a tumor.

  6. Honey says:

    hahahaha…i had a good laugh reading this… :D you must be so fortunate to meet so many interesting characters… :D…hahahaha…fish and chips made out of chicken meat…

  7. kimberlycun says:

    buwahahah our very own jessica simpson. on a sidenote, was that chicken maryland? heh

  8. Kah Chun says:

    I wouldn’t question Elliot’s intelligence for he eats fish ‘n chips as breakfast… Ok, unless breakfast for you guys means brunch ;)

  9. michaelooi says:

    honey – In a way, it’s kinda good. It gives me something to mock and blog.

    kim – No lar, I’m very sure that it’s not chicken maryland.(Maryland is usually served with honey, not tartars… if I’m not mistaken). But I knew it because Ted told me it’s fish.

    Kah Chun – It was Ted’s. Yes, that’s supposed to be his brunch. That guy’s a diet freak. Probably even anorexic.

  10. Raksha says:

    HAHAHA!! Male bimbo version of Jessica Simpson >> ‘Is this chicken or tuna that I’m eating?’

    Another possible theory…he has empty space where the brain should be. Try knocking on his head. If it sounds hollows and echoes…then this theory is confirmed..ehhe..

  11. Lin says:

    there must be an interesting story abt the smart people in your office? or smart people doing dumb things?but then again, wouldnt that mean they’re dumb too? i think i’ve just contradicted myself.

    you’re always able to write about boring,mundane,ordinary situation/story/incident into an interesting one.surely there must be an “interesting” story abt the smart ones there.

    ted is the proof that not all anorexics are female.

  12. michaelooi says:

    raksha – At least Jessica Simpson can count on her looks to score…

    lin – You already knew that smart people are scarce in our office. And I’m one of very few of them (ahem). That’s because, I know who you are.

  13. summer says:

    muahahahahahahaha!!! what a dumb ass…

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