June 6, 2005

a tribute to potatoes

Why I think a sack of potatoes makes a better boss than my current department head :

– It will not ask me stupid questions at the end of my presentations like “Why didn’t you foresee those problems coming etc etc ?” – which, I’ll have to explain that I’m not some kind of wizard that could predict the future and expect the unexpected.

– A sack of potatoes may be as dumb as my department head (sometimes smarter), but at least it’s quiet and doesn’t try to act smart in front of us.

– I will not lose my job if I punch a bag of potatoes.

– A lot of people like potatoes. But very few people (or no-one) like my department head.

– Potassium inside potatoes is good for our nerve functions. The shits inside my department head is good for nothing.

– A sack of potatoes will not send me emails asking me questions that require ‘urgent’ response (hint: cellphone).

– A sack of potatoes will not call me on my cellphone even if it’s the most urgent of matters. They just don’t give a fuck.

– A sack of potatoes doesn’t have halitosis.

– A potato have dysfunctional eyes that see nothing. My department head have dysfunctional eyes that sees none of my strength and all of my negative traits.

– I will not feel embarrassed to bring a sack of potatoes to a cross functional meeting because I know it will remain quiet throughout the meeting without making an ass out of itself.

– If I ever got pissed and boil that sack of potatoes with hot water, I’ll get rich carbohydrate food out of it. If I boil my department head, I lose my future and freedom.

Life is like a volume of water. It pretty much becomes of what it flows into. Mine had just spilled onto a pile of dirt.

michaelooi  | satirical shit  | 

8 Comments to “a tribute to potatoes”

  1. tEo says:

    I’m now working temporary as it’s semester break.
    So, in my case, potatoes make better colleagues, especially those Malays colleagues cos :
    1) They won’t question my work whereas their works are worse than mine.
    2) They will mind their own business.
    3) They will keep their mouth shut & don’t act as if they r smarter than i.
    4) They won’t apple-polishing the branch officers & managers.
    5) Whenever i feel angry, i can give these potatoes to my mum & cook for my whole family.
    6) And most importantly, i can replace them anytime if i find they are eyesores to me.
    7) There are 1001 more reasons.

  2. zbjernak says:

    i think there are dozens of people out there who are not satisfied with their bosses…

    well i just need to say…i am lucky for i have the best bosses in the office

    the rest of the dept head sucks…but mine rocks!

    hope i never have to go through what ever you are facing now in future….

  3. li says:

    get a new job and new life….

  4. Primrose says:

    …or a couch potato and binge out for a while. :O

  5. megabigblur says:

    This is hilarious. Hopefully your dept head doesn’t read blogs =D

  6. dSaint says:

    respect on the last 2 sentences dude.

  7. oliviasy says:

    now u know why i sometimes prefer to talk to animals… at least animals don’t tell me stupid stuff.

  8. michaelooi says:

    olivia – you t…t…ttttt..ttalk to animals ..?

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