panda’s deadline
The latest piece of news I received from Wilson about Panda, was that she’s gonna be forced to resign and she has to do it by today. Well, No surprise for us … as this is the expected price one has to pay for under utilizing their brain when doing stuffs. The management pays you to work, not to be stupid.
For the past few weeks, she has been wanting to leave the company for good, but she kept procrastinating about the matter. Well, now that everyone is kinda pissed about the lack of progress (yes, we hoped), she (yes, my director’s a lady) actually called for a meet up with Panda and had a lengthy discussion with her.
I do not exactly have an idea what my director told her, but what I learnt from Wilson, was that Panda got out from the discussion at about 3pm … and immediately scampered into the toilet, shove her hollow brain container into the toilet bowl and flushed repeatedly till it bloated like a blowfish.
o_O”
Was kidding. She actually went in and cried until 5 pm. For those of you who’s feeble in Maths, let me assist you here - that’s TWO FUCKING HOURS inside the toilet. Crying. (not to mention inhaling the ‘fresh air’ inside). And by the time she came out from the lavatory, her eyes were swollen like she’s having a testicle growing out from each eye.
And that’s not all, she went back home and cried more, probably the whole night. We knew that because her eyes basically looked like Homer’s the next morning, all swollen up and with even larger radius of dark rims.
It was both intriguing and confusing for all of us. Why cry ? Like crying can actually solve her problems ? Or perhaps that was done for the sake of gaining sympathy (free sex from animals) ?
I don’t know man, she’s damn weird. If that fails to convince you of this fact, dig this - she folded her jeans for approximately 1 feet high, revealing her pair of black shiny leather shoe with her fully pulled up socks. Blearrgghh ! (her armpit’s probably unshaved too, but I’m not finding out).
I just hope that she would meet the deadline of dumping in her resignation by today - we’ve had enough suffering…
Wilson actually was kinda upset about all these happenings. He said that he’s probably gonna go for vacation or something on the final week of her tenure here - just be somewhere else. Why ? Coz you’ll never know if she’s going to snap and go postal inside the office, cutting everybody up with a machete. (Unlikely a gun though, as she’s too dumb to figure out how to obtain one … and even if she were to be given one, she may not even know how to pull the trigger).
At last, got one person go find the nearest toilet bowl, put her head in, and flushed.
why in the first place they hired her?
her dumbness sounds so obvious (even scary) that even the blind guy can notice that…!
pity for her…but life’s like that
people won’t put their money without expecting something in return
OMG.
I suspect Panda blurly as fish after school day. It is a good thing she know what hit her(but I doubt she understand). The dress style that you mentioned is those stupid young Yapunist/Taiwanese singer imitates. Mentally speaking, she is still a kid!
Anyway, if your company practice probation period, it will be easier.
If you are close to Wilson, perhaps you should hint him to polish his interviewing skill and knowledge.
*so cham*… =P
It’s a disaster to have her in the company!!
I feel a little sorry for her. She might be stuck in this rut for some time, if she doesn’t learn from this.
There goes one of your blog’s “heroines”.
Pure PWNage! Have a heart. Gift her a CAT or DOG.
wahlau you so bad lah… hahahha but i’m laughing…
i wonder if she knows about your site anyway… you’ve been writing so much bout her.
poor panda … if i were her … i think i prolly would have wished i was flushed down the toilet … kecian sama dia
wtf mike! CIS
There is a God!
Can’t imagine being with her for 1 week let alone for 6 month (about there right?). Makes you wonder how did she get her A’s in college and university.
alphonso - i’m pretty she would have done that if she reads my blog. She clueless …
dean_dang / moo_t - I know why she was hired. Reasons I cannot reveal because there are plenty my readers here know where I work … and revealing things like this wouldn’t be good for my company’s image. Trust me, this isn’t about Wilson’s interviewing skills. This is about something else out of his control…
reta - you mean us ? yeah. It’s hard to work with a doofus. Really.
tiuniasing - couldn’t agree more dude.
iblogme - heroine ? I wouldn’t call her that. She’s more like a villain to me.
xavier a.k.a ken - use back your name Ken lah. Just comment properly … it’ll still get published. But behave yourself, ok ? kuai kuai
minishorts - she wouldn’t find out kua… I mean, she’s having a lot of trouble to even use the FIND function in Excel, searching for my blog would be next to impossible for her …
fuchsia - too much spam lar. I have to enable the comment moderation feature. Have always wanted to do this …
rodney - i reckoned that her brain actually worn out after rigorous use during her Uni years. That’s why she’s more stupid than a hamster now …
Halo, my sister had used the Hamster as her animal behavioral studies during her uni years, and she said that they are actually quite instinctive to find ways to get to the food, even though there’s maze before it.
Anyway, I thought it is better that everyone better be away too before something bad happened???
anyway you make her really famous… so after she go how… no more panda story….
i think in that way i am so going to miss her hahahahha.
Ah, I remember she’s a first class reject from Technical Support! Don’t know why Wilson would take her up from our list. Hehehe, as for the gun thing, I’m afraid she might hold it at a wrong angle and shoot herself instead. Hey, at least it saves Wilson’s mess a whole lot more!
This is why I am so skeptical about straight A students.
poor kid. hope she grows up after the washing down.
Bet that will save you guys from being “tortured” by her!
dana - be away and let her wreck our workplace down ? no way… I’m gonna bring a crowbar to work from now on. Anything wrong, I’m gonna reboot her brain.
minishorts - awwww, you’re such a warm person. I didn’t that you’re an animal lover…
jase - well, that time, the headcount’s closing. He had no choice but hire the ONLY candidate that applied for that post.
vincent - straight A students tend to be overconfident and condescend. I’m not afraid to admit that, we engineering folks here ? Would actually hire those at mean of the bell curve out of the candidates - that means, those that performed average in academic … we need team members … not a one-man-army. Nuff said.
buaya69 - she grew up alright. Look at her size. She could wrestle a full grown alligator (not crocodile though *wink*). It’s just her brain that’s impaired …
Mike, remember to WARN us the company she is heading to next. We want to STAY CLEAR of her.
That’s why computing field is really not a bandwagon…
neeshen: Perhaps IWK, since she likes a cubicle in the toilet that much to stay in there for 2 hours (2 friggin’ company payroll hours!)
So wat happen to Panada..??
shoulda always hire only hot chicks.