weird couple
Yesterday, while I was dining in a Taiwanese fast food restaurant with Emily, we suddenly heard something very disturbing … It sounded like this - “Uweeeeeee~~~Eeeeeyeeerrrr~~~~”. Like some she-male asking for permission if they could blow your cream off for 50 cents (you know, that kind of traumatic effeminate tone i.e. the Malay dubbed Doraemon voice). As my goosebumps started proliferate across my body, I turned around check out if there’s really a lady boy there …
Apparently, no. It’s actually a real girl that I’ve just heard. Some very annoying teenager with her beatnik boyfriend that has a very shock inducing hairstyle (spiky pattern that reminded me of those filth stalactites drooping under a protruded sewer pipe). The girl was sort of adulating her boyfriend by feigning cute poses and acts to entertain him up. You know, purr like a cat, asking stupid questions like an autistic tard, pretending to be cute… And occasionally, would even stroke the guy’s hair admiring him … (for what, I’m not sure. But I’m sure if I were to be that guy, I would have grabbed the girl’s hair, and repetitively slapped her while yelling “wake up bitch ! wake up bitch !” … or simply crash a wooden stool on that bitch’s skull for being such a peeve.)
The couple continued to frolic around with their inept teasing and giggled like schoolgirls … until about 5 minutes later, they decided to leave the place. As one of their members (yes, there’s another blimp chick with them) went to settle the bill … the 2 bird brains started to pull more puke inducing stunts around the area… like
- hugging and pecking each other’s face
- making stupid faces in front of the mirror deco
- dancing and jumping around the restaurant floor (I kid you not !)
I do not know what was that girl’s problem. Perhaps she has damaged her brain from an overdosage of Chinese love novels and junk food… or being possessed by some stray evil spirit. Other than those reasons, I do not foresee that there’s any rationale for anyone to behave like this. This isn’t normal. But then, I wouldn’t want to put the blame solely on that girl either. That imbecile boyfriend also ought to be hung and shot as well… for :
1) allowing his intellectually impaired girlfriend to mess with his hair… and
2) for not having the profound taste in grooming his own hairstyle properly.
(But then, it could be that weird girl that wanted his hair to be like that, and probably was threatened of having his balls crushed during sex if he doesn’t comply with her demands …*shrugs*)
Anyway, you single guys out there …better be more careful selecting your girlfriends. Make sure they’re not crazy or mentally impaired before professing your love. Beauty is not all that matters.
(tips : give her an IQ exam or a couple of math questions before expressing your love …)
increment 1 in ur “lunatic list”, or perhaps 2 (the bf)…hehe
Heheh, I would get them to fill out application forms and send to my address. Will call within 2 weeks. The would have to pass my interview then only can be my girlfriend. Let me compile my results before I decide to publish the effectiveness here eh Mike?
I really can’t stand those gals trying to act “cute” in front of guys.
Ok..there are some who are genuinely cute(by nature)but for those who are pretending to be cute,they are so “fake” & in fact,look like idiots to me.
Aiyo….’cham’ lor.In order to successfully become other ppl’s girlfriend,have to sit for IQ test/maths test & pass interview somemore.Hmmm…next time,if there is a guy asking me math questions,there are only 2 possibilities….
1)he’s stupid cos dunno how to solve them
2)he reads ur blog
but but … I hug and kiss my girlfriends all the time!!!!!!
and we’re cute too … but … I personally hate it when girls do it to their boyfriends. If i ever did that to my bf in public, I’ll let ANYONE shoot me/slap me/ punch me/ kick me/ whack me with the wooden stool 
i think that girl read your previous post but unhappy she was not in your top10 .. hahha
wei mike .. why u are always surrounded with strange ppl hah ? your aura give them courage to be strange ka ?
you’re from sdm. rite…?
Tsk tsk tsk! Attention-seeking brats. Sounds like some “sam par por” to me (from Jinjang) who has not seen the “tai cheong min”. Either that or they have just been released from their bird cages.
TOUCHED HIS HAIR?!
lethal mistake if it were me. a guy’s hair is strictly off limits. a single carress could ruin hours of careful styling. =P
yea…displaying affection in public is kinda annoying, cute or not. Save it in your room before sex I would say. Touching me hair? wait for my bloody axe ready!
Erm, suggest you put a psychological test as the first exam, followed by your recommended exams. For me I prefer to identify and stay far far away from psychotic girls that might, when you break up with them, take part of your body as a souvenir. *Shrugs*
IQ doesn’t solve it. I’ve seen very high IQ people, when paired together, doing really scary slash annoying slash disgusting stuffs slash yadda yadda stuffs
Believe me
EQ could do it…
Wait, there isn’t enough sane people to start with
Wah, Penang dangerous place lah. So many lunatic morons at there…
Eh, good idea also hor, give IQ exam, EQ exam, psycological exam, external exam to select girlfriend. Thanks a lot. I’ll practise that.
flo - i don’t think she’s really crazy but … just … mentally unsound.
din - good luck in trying that dude. Add a few more tests to the list - gravity test (girl bend over and see her tit’s size under gravity pull), grope test (self explanatory), and plow test (insert dick into her bearded clam)
tEo - yaler, why act cute to lure attention ? just strip naked lah .. right ?
fuchsialowe - sure girl, I’m gonna get a crowbar ready as well.. kih kih kih
saintis - let’s just say I’m more observant than most people
kolokmee - what’s sdm ? can eat aa ?
primrose - too much chinese fictional novels perhaps … or read those moronic Sister’s magazine too much
void / 100 - they’re just simply too ignorant about our feelings sometimes… how could they do that to us ?? simply a disappointment… girls nowadays … DON’T BE FUCKING TOUCH OUR HAIRS ALREADY !!!! …unless it’s pubic.
southernlight - and a jolt with a cattle prod to verify if she reacts appropriately (human reacts differently to pain…)
ee fei - EQ test ? they won’t do it as well. Some students with high EQ are downright stupid. Look at Panda. OMFG.
alphonso - yeah, don’t come to Penang next time, there’ll be loads of clowns waiting to tear your clothes and rape you there. Don’t… don’t.
My friend and I named them ‘itchified’ girls.
1. Very mengada
2. Suffering from ADD
3. Very ‘hiau’
One particular itchified girl thought she was very ‘cute’ in holding the lift..twice! I could bitch-slap her with all my might. Wait, bitch-slap all itchified girls who’re on my way!
Public display of affection is not wrong but not to THAT extend la hor sim… Attention seeking couple la konon.
Kekeke… you never heard of birds of the same feather block together? Maybe that guy oso 8 tahil half kilo with the gals.
You should go to taiwan to see the gals talk… even 50th Ah Ma talks like that too.
cyber-red - let’s organize a bitch slap itchyfied girls day !
suen - who’s attention, I do not know - coz there were only myself, emily and a stodgy bloke hoovering noodles there … *shrugs*
fish fish - i’ve been to taiwan before … there girls there aren’t really like that … but sort of yells out loud like fish mongers. In the wrong part of Taiwan perhaps… hehehehh