November 22, 2004

weird

Emily needs to get some documents stamped this morning and I had to chauffeur her to the income tax office – which was located at one of the busiest streets in Penang. Parking space were meager, so, I decided to just stop by the roadside to wait for her. It was right in front of a motorcycle parking lot.

It was a very busy morning, with droves of motorcyclists passing in and out by my car. Then came an old man on his bike with his pillion….a very young girl in her early 20’s.

Ok, forget about the old man. The young girl, was with a flowy long hair, sleeveless top and a very low cut hipster pants. Very promising from the first look from behind. But when she turned to reveal her front, my fucking god, she’s worth 1.5 barf cycle. The extra 0.5 was the result of her protruding lard belly… with some dark sediments visible inside her belly button (I’m not making this up). So much of them, that it could actually grow a tomato plant inside her belly button [puke puke]

She was also blessed with a set of really rickety and jagged brownish teeth, the type that would leave forensic experts confused if she were to leave a bite mark on a murder victim. A dog would have stayed out of her path.

Alright, you get the picture. I presume that she’s the old man’s daughter. They had a short talk upon descending from the bike and I could then see the old man gesticulating to his daughter to ‘wait here goddamn it.. wait here!’.

The old man then walked into some government building, leaving his ratfink daughter alone. It was then, she let out this really eery cackle, by herself. She was whipping out her mobile phone while doing that. I don’t fucking know what was so funny about mobile phones but, she gave me the creeps that words could never describe.

Then I saw her muttering by herself, and then cackled even more. No, there wasn’t any bluetooth handsfree device nor any earplugs on either side of her ears. Her phone was the oldskool type anyway, one that comes in handy to crush crabs – I don’t think it is able to support any wireless device.

It went on like this for about 5 minutes – you know, muttering to herself, let out sheepish smile, mutter, cackle. As if she was having some really interesting conversation with someone. Who? I don’t frigging know.

The only thought that crossed my mind was, what if the bitch leaps onto my car hood and starts to perform a skanky Guns N Roses headbang? I mean, what should I do if she does that? I can’t just simply beat the shit out of her – she could be mental and bite me!

But then, from what I reckoned, I don’t think she’s really cracked in the head. She’s normal. So, what actually made her behave in such a way?

Imaginary friends? Dead spirits? Are the aliens behind this? This is so weird.

michaelooi  | what I saw  | 

29 Comments to “weird”

  1. shanks says:

    a nice slim body with a pair of nice behinds, long hair with tight jeans hugging the hips for dear life, butt cheek swaying from side to side. cun chick from the back.

    turn around and you see red facial skin with zits, oily broad-flat nose and sausages for lips. shit!

    from time to time, my life will cross path with one of these monsters, but ur monster-sample with fertilizer-filled belly-button takes home the trophy.

  2. hx says:

    oh… prob is..multiple personality disorder. tht happens when another character inside her takes over.. or prob few characters cracking jokes together.. schezophrenic

  3. michaelooi says:

    scary people out there … goddamn. the world is becoming more dangerous as each day passes by.

    brace yourself for the end of the world !

  4. jefferi says:

    my father is a jerk and i am an idiot lame duck.

    Edited by Siteowner

  5. HP says:

    mmm…. this is getting way too much. Basic respect should always be given to the bloggers, afterall, it is their blogs, not yours! Must say that different people tends to move with different frequency. Hey dude, if your wavelength doesn’t seems to tune in, then go somewhere else!!

  6. shanks says:

    this has become really unpleasant. why dun u get ur own free blog and call it “jefferi vs michael ooi” and ping pps. then the pondans and the idiot gweilos from his office can visit ur site and leave comments. wouldn’t that be nice and civilized?

  7. water_junk says:

    duno y it ALWAYS happened to me as well… believe in water_junk’s theory:

    “gals that look good from far are always far from good.”

    dun trust a gal is pretty by lookin at her back. repeat that 10 times by urself. memorized? good.

  8. shanks says:

    water_junk – me and male frens’s motto of chick-spotting is similar to urs but in different words, “nice from far, far from nice”.

  9. JxT2J says:

    LoL. This jefferi really has too much time on his hands.

    As to your article here, maybe the girl is chuckling over her cutesy screensaver. Or… she just bought a new housing for her handphone.

  10. Aiyoh son… U best onli laik tis ah? Cum home suck my klit better ler… U think people dunno who u r ah? Peepur oledi got ur resume & foto liao ler… Ur dildo luk laik damn botak & ur mudder mya hight onli able 2 suk his kok lar… wakakakakaka

  11. wut long wit me having hare color of an ang moh ah? why u all laffing @ me luking laik blardy ah lian wif wrinkled skin?

  12. son… i need an ass to fuck. can i use urs ?

  13. jefferi says:

    yes. come. fuck my ass. hard hard ok ? i’ll fuck you back later. :)

  14. naeboo~ says:

    ppl who spam comments like those are either too paralysed by jealousy to compete like normal human beings or too immature to comprehend the meaning of “outstaying his welcome”.

    hmm…

    i cant decide. i think both :)

  15. Hey come on, you ppl. Stop disturbing my sweet Jefferi like this. No wonder he’s been so depressed lately he refused to go down on me. I knew there’re outside factors disturbing his already disturbed mind. Now I know. Stop it!! You are wrecking our love life. Now I had to resort to forcefully pulling him by the ears to go down on me. Even then, he refused to swallow like he always does and he never go “wakakakaka” like he always does after every mouthful. Stop it , please.

  16. ShaolinTiger says:

    All the people ‘responding’ to ‘jeffri’ whatever seemingly self-righteous and wise comments you make, you are wrong. Whatever you say you are basically giving him attention, which is exactly what he wants.

    Sadly michael has given him the higest troll honour by acting posting about him in his blog..

    The guy has you all believing, and reacting just like he wants…it’ll only get worse :)

  17. vyne says:

    omg, if this dude is really 26 yo then he’s got the mentality of a shoe size 5. =)

  18. michaelooi says:

    shaolintiger – we’re doing it for fun’s sake. Not really honoring him (if it’s not that obvious to you).

    that guy’s probably jumping mad now. His life is reduced to repeatedly spamming a blogger’s commenting system. He must have spent a lot of time typing and thinking.

    well, what he failed to realize is, i can rid of his goofy messages by just a click of a button. *shrugs*

  19. graceshu says:

    =/

    very scary meh?

    =(

  20. zbjernak says:

    that is why we chinese have a proverb…

    “au ber lin tai, tau cheng ka na sai”

    lin tai = pretty girl…actress of the 60’s

  21. michaelooi says:

    grace – any resemblence to any living individual is purely coincidental. No you’re not scary ;)

    zbjernak – i know lindai … the hot hoochiemama that made all the blokes in the 60’s went nuts.

  22. Elphinstone says:

    T_T now i know what most guys think of me… lol!!

  23. Din says:

    Mike, you need a recovery device, always keep a porn mazaine in your car, should you need relief, just like what panadol does to headaches.

  24. michaelooi says:

    elphinstone – awww.. i don’t mean that … *sheesh.. i have no idea that there’s so many of you out there that suffers the same problem*

    din – you keep a copy of that thang in your car ? *salute*
    I don’t fancy porn stars lah…

  25. zbjernak says:

    perhaps tht belly-button girl has the SPEAKER PHONE’s function leh

    ehheheheeheheh

  26. shanks says:

    it’s after office hours, it’s time to brace ourselves to face jefferi-tard.

  27. Vincent says:

    well, too bad jefferi suffered from a disease called “suk chun”…didnt see him post anything today…i guess he wont be coming here today to “entertain” us with his “retarted-ness” jokes…

  28. ShaolinTiger says:

    It’s ok dude, i just been heavily involved in this kind of thing before….and sometimes it goes to far ok and spills into some bad shit in real life..unlikely here, just sometimes the ‘fun’ get’s out of hand.

    There are real people behind these portrayed bits and bites anyway ;)

    BTW back to the original post…these kind of chicks scare me..I’ve almost actually puked before, especially those with awesome butts but when they turn around they have those huge ‘horse’ gums..omfgwtfstfugfy…

  29. michaelooi says:

    shaolintiger – agree with you. i retain the flame because it had just contributed extra 10% of traffic to my site. Sort of like an exposure to the public lah .. eheheh.

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