September 27, 2004

“Pontianak Sundal” (2004)

Watched “Pontianak Sundal Something Something” last night. My darn sister bought the original VCD – that doesn’t carry any subtitles (told ya original sux). Which means, I’ll have to depend on my long lost knowledge of the forbidden language to understand it. (*pontianak = it’s a female vampire from Malaysian folklore)

Normally, I don’t fancy Malay movies. I only watched 2 Malay movies before in my whole life.

1) Orang Minyak – starred by the late P.Ramlee. Watched it when I was a kid. Interesting movie for my standard at that time. It’s about some psychotic dude that goes around the village raping middle aged housewives. And he looked like Spiderman in black. Naked.

2) Bukit Kepong – a movie that was shown repeatedly on TV when there wasn’t any satellite reception back then. It was about a bunch of Japanese farts that mowed down a whole village of rookie soldiers (including housewives and kids). Kinda nice. It would be better with more violence and colors.

So, this “Pontianak Sundal Something Something”… big deal. Won a few awards recently at Spain. And I guess that’s why I was so eager to check it out. My third Malay movie.

My verdict ? Avoid this movie at all cost. Not worth even a pirated VCD. It’s really ‘sundal’. Which means, it sucks. The movie was edited in such a frivolous way that I didn’t even know what was going on one scene to the next. Goddamn.

A few summarized comments :

1) The pregnant heroine turned into a pontianak after she was murdered (she’s a heroine because she’s hot). But her maid didn’t (she was murdered too). So, does that mean, if one were to be murdered when pregnant, she would turn into a super powerful pontianak? And if that’s the case, why Sharon Tate did not turn into a pontianak to smoke Charles Manson’s ass ?

2) It seems like the pontianak (in the movie) was a crazy fuck. When she was resurrected as a pontianak, she went around killing everyone except the villain who murdered her. Kinda ironic, isn’t it ?

3) Alright, my perception of the pontianak is – a female vampire. And we all know that vampires suck blood. They’re gonna need fangs to do the job. This pontianak sundal, she didn’t have any fangs (just a pair of great tits). She killed her victims by using her pair of wolverine like claws. Zweek zwekk… scream… and that’s it. Cheesy.

4) The design of the pontianak was not impressive enough. It’s still the same old asian ghost design. Long hair, white robes and some very thick powder on the face. And in this movie, the pontianak even sported a pair of eyes with a very bad case of conjunctivitis. Made my eyes watery at certain point. Ma fuck.

5) I was confused who was who in the movie. The script was confusing. The flick was badly edited. Obviously, the director is a Stephen King wannabe. (and Stephen King sux).

I reckoned that the movie will be way better if it focuses more on the haunting of a pontianak instead of trying to cramp storyline, haunting and stephen king elements in it. But then, having won so many awards, how much better could the director ask for?

michaelooi  | movie reviews  | 

The commenting function has been disabled.