September 15, 2004

some happenings in the mall

I was at this really big DVD outlet with Emily on Saturday evening – selecting a few favorite titles to kill off our boring Sunday – when suddenly, all the lights went out. It was pitch dark at the corner we’re standing and I could hear some paranoid middle aged housewives screaming and squealing… as if they’ve seen something really freaky. Emily grabbed my hand and squeezed really hard – she was freaking out.

I initially thought it was just a blackout… but apparently, it wasn’t. There were still lights from outside the outlet. It couldn’t have been a blackout – I thought. There were approximately over 50 patrons inside that outlet, and everyone was confused on what was happening (except a few of the afore mentioned housewives, who were still screaming like some 5 year old sissy kids).

Like the rest, I was also clueless until I saw a few of the DVD shop operators skedaddled towards the entrance and started to pull down the sliding vertical door frantically. There were approximately 8 to 10 doors (it was a big ass outlet, almost like a warehouse) and they were shutting their outlet down in flash speed.

At that moment, I started to realize what was going on. Without further procrastination, I quickly dumped the DVD’s I was holding and dragged Emily out from the shop – along with the rest of the fleeing patrons. When we reached outside the outlet onto the mall corridor, a thunderous noise of doors simultaneously being slid down could be heard across the mall… and all of them were DVD outlets. And if you’ve already guessed what it was, yes, that’s right – it was a pirated DVD raid.

It was a sight to behold. From my candid observation, I reckoned that pirates must have at least broken 4 world records that night …

1) The most pirated DVD outlets closing down for business simultaneously at the same time.
2) The most people throng out from pirated DVD outlets onto a mall corridor, all simultaneously, at the same time.
3) The fastest evacuation from pirated DVD outlets inside a mall, all simultaneously, at the same time.
4) The most housewives screaming in terror inside pirated DVD outlets like real pirates inside a mall, all simultaneously, at the same time.

Apart from witnessing the multiple world records, I also witnessed a white guy holding a big stack of pirated DVDs, insisting to buy them up before leaving. From what I observed, the white guy must have selected those DVDs for hours, and couldn’t dig the fact that he had to leave the place empty handed. The DVD guy shoo-ed him away and the white dude kept pleading the DVD guy to let him have the movies.

So, what’s with these pirated DVDs? Well, in Penang, it’s still a very common thing. Not much raids around, and pirated DVDs can be basically found almost everywhere. With the exceptionally cheap price, it’s no surprise that they have become a daily necessity for Penang dwellers. And with the wonder of cellular phones, these pirates are almost impossible to eradicate – just like what happened in that mall on Saturday.

And also, I’m not ashamed to admit – that I support pirated DVDs. Why? Like I have blogged before, pirated DVDs in Malaysia are actually more ‘original’ from the authentic ones. “How come ?” one may ask. Well, in Malaysia, we have this censorship board that are paranoid of almost everything. They have this conservative perception that Malaysian youths are very docile, and are easily influenced by foreign ideologies. For eg. they believe that watching a kiss scene in movie could turn a person into some sadistic sex motivated serial killer…

That’s why the movies in our cinemas and authentic DVDs are all censored out of senses. We don’t get to see tits, fucks and kisses. Ass creaming scenes will be most likely censored off and if the plot has anything to do with anything religious, the movie will be completely banned altogether. That left us Malaysians with little choice but to resort to pirated movies. Simple reasons that some people fail to understand.

Long live pirated DVDs.

P/S: I only support pirated DVD movies and games, but I always buy original music. This is due to my respect for the wonderful work of artistes that have sculptured the world culture. I would have supported original movie DVDs if it’s not for the overdone censorships.

michaelooi  | happenings  | 

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