August 28, 2004

in the middle of everything

Last week, one of the managers in my department organized an event for the Customer Service team to visit my lab. To understand more about the corporate operations – he said. Those Customer Service visitors encompassed both old and young executives… and their entourage was divided into 4 batches of visits – on Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday respectively.

Well, of course I’m kinda disturbed with the fact that my lab will be harboring visitors with us engineers inside looking like a bunch of stinking zoo animals. Oh wait a minute, maybe worse than zoo animals… because the zoo animals do not have to fucking brief the visitors. Yes, that’s right, I was required to walk those zoo visitors through about the operations of our zoo lab.

Now you don’t see an orang utan (inside a zoo) come near from its cage to introduce itself and sort of explain what it does everyday… do you ?

“Hi, my name is Atan. I am one of the resident orang utan in this zoo. Basically, I am responsible to brief you guys about what we actually do here. Well, see that other ape there? That is LilianToo. etc etc etc… ”

No they don’t do that. They only need to look cool, sleep and eat the whole day. Me? I have to brief those bunch of young executives again and again for 4 freaking times. But I had a plan. I would make use of my fast speaking skills to quickly finish them off… and dismiss the troop to some other places. Hell yeah I did that alright… but for only the first 2 group.

The 3rd group? Was a bunch of super sweet and cute looking young execs. OMFG. I was so stunned when I realized that there were at least 1/2 dozen of pretty young things staring at me when I was about to start my briefing. I started to sweat like mad and my speech stuttered. My eyes were disoriented (coz I don’t know where to look) and suddenly, I passed out.

Then somebody shouted for emergency and one of the sweetest looking girls mounted up on me to give me a pump on my chest. She thought I was having a heart attack or something. Oh that was so embarrassing. But when the pumping action didn’t work, she resorted to the advanced method – mouth to mouth resuscitation (my favorite).

She took off her jacket to reveal her sleeveless blouse (no armpit hair – passed), and started to press her mouth against mine. And she blew a strawberry scented breath into my lungs — oh it was so beautiful. And that… my friends, revived me from my blackout and I reacted by groping her tits accompanied with a squeal. I thought I was in trouble but she said it was ok because she knew it was an accident.

Then there was this moment of silence. Everyone was frozen and so was I… as if time had stopped itself. That was when I realized, I was in the middle of an explanation for a question and I stopped to daydream about the kinky mouth to mouth rescue thingy. How disappointing. Damn… and how the hell could I daydream in the middle of a speech? Was that some kind of sign that my brain is getting old? I seriously think I need to go for a vacation. This is getting out of control…

PS: I managed to explain to the 3rd group in a lengthy manner, buying a lot of time to enjoy basking the company of those SYT’s…

michaelooi  | work shit  | 

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