jason’s near death experience

*once upon a time…

Me, Jason and an Indian lady was inside a descending elevator. It was all quiet inside, when Jason suddenly broke the silence. He spoke to me in hokkien…

Jason : “dude … ”

Me : “yeah ?”

Jason : “did you smell that ?”

Me : “smell what ?”

Jason : “the lady… she stinks”

I took a glance at the lady, she looked back at me, then at Jason. (he’s facing the control panel, the lady’s standing behind him, i’m standing opposite them)
As I’m a (very) smart person, I managed to figure out that the indian lady actually understands hokkien… and probably can speak them well too. Instead of joining Jason to scoff the lady, I tried to steer my friend away from getting into the ominous conversation.

Me : “errr… i didn’t smell anything. Just shut up ok ?”

Jason : “no man .. I’m serious. She fucking stinks… kanneh.”

I took another look at the lady, her eyes were almost popping out from her socket. Her face was portending evil and i can tell she’s about to explode. Instead…

Jason : “heheheh… kanneh… please ler.. when i tell you that, don’t turn back to look. She might notice that we’re talking about her…”

Me : “look man, i think you should just shut up.. ok???”

I was trying to hint him up that he’s in great danger, but Jason wasn’t really a bright person, and it’s not surprising he’s not getting it. (he looked a bit like Jack Black)

Jason : “did you see her face ? man, she even has a beard … maybe she’s a transvestite ? a stinking transvestite heheheh .. ”

There were smokes coming out from the lady’s nostril .. I can tell she was fuming mad and felt very miserable at the same time.

I just kept quiet. I have no more intention of saving my friend anymore. I sort of gave up and instead, consented the lady to do whatever she wants to Jason. Rape him, kill him or whatever. I’ll just play dead. Jason the dork kept laughing and ridiculing the indian lady until our floor stops - to which ..I instantly jumped out from the elevator without looking to the back.

Fortunately, the lady did not do anything to Jason. Not even a verbal confrontation. Jason was very lucky. He could have gotten himself killed easily by labeling her as a “stinking transvestite”. When I told Jason later about the situation, his face immediately turned pale and livid looking.

Lesson learnt : thou should never insult anyone unless you’re abso-fucking-lutely sure that… he/she’s not around.