Nothing special happened on day three. Went to work, eat and back to sleep. But I’ve a few trivial pictures to share though …

I need more sleep. Will post more.

Let brother michael share with you on things that you should comply when you’re eating. This is from his experience in living off as a noble young man …
If you’re from China and thinks that it’s a cultural thing to have no table manners at all ? Well… GO FUCK YOURSELF.

- shut your mouth when you eat. It will conceal any noise from your munching actions, coz nobody wants to hear how you eat. Only pigs and dogs eat with plenty of noise. Coz they’re not supposed to be civilized .. and they don’t care. Civilized men eat with their mouth closed shut.

- when you eat, don’t shake your legs. It’s annoying. It makes your dining partner felt that he/she must be dining with life sized vibrator. It’s no good. Nobody wants to eat with a vibrator. Only sluts does that.

- don’t talk when you have food in your mouth. Coz it would send micro-projectiles of mushed food either onto the table or the dish that your partner might want to eat. It’s unhygienic. Nobody wants to eat your spit or see the crunched food inside your mouth. Please.

- don’t burp when you’re eating. Do that in the toilet, inside the coffin 6 feet underground, or somewhere in the middle of the desert. Burp equals fart coming from your mouth. And yes they fucking stinks. Nobody likes that.

That’s as general as it can be. There might be a thousands more that may be too specific to some people but, the main ones above should cut the mustard.

4 years ago, when I was here, I went to a restaurant to whack the most unbelievable cheap steaks that money can buy. For 11 bucks eat-all-you-can, you’ll never go to Victoria Station ever again after consuming those lard laden greasy food. Eat till I almost drop with another colleague, that I can still remember it till today.

I was searching for that restaurant again yesterday afternoon, and finally found it after making a lot of illegal u-turns. And so, I told cheecheongfun that we’re gonna whack some serious food that night, and be prepared to get killed.

And so, we arrived there with a hungry stomach. As usual, the first thing that I would attack is steak. Had plenty of them .. and some serious supply of meatballs. My appetite was so good, that I believe I’m able to consume a full grown cow out of the steaks.

But half plate through, I had a problem. The acoustic level of someone chomping on something. That’s right - cheecheongfun was at it again. The family of blimps opposite the table of ours was kinda like checking him out. He was eating so boisterously, that I was more often caught in a dilemma of whether to tell him to shut up.

Telling him might give me some peace but, it would hurt that guy too much. Maybe it’s the cultural thing of having the need to eat like a pig but, I can tell that not much people can tolerate that. To me, this is a general table manners. It’s that simple.

As if it isn’t bad enough, cheecheongfun suddenly gave out a shrill burp. More like a yelp. Gas escaping from his throat out to the public. So loud, that even he himself was dumbfucked by the sudden blast of gas and he was covering his own mouth in embarassment. You know what’s his problem ? He ate too fast … too loud … and when he gulped a large amount of soda, the gas had nowhere to escape but through his stinking mouth.

I was lucky that there were no food crumbs blasting onto my face from his mouth. Somebody tell me … IS THIS GUY NORMAL ?

I was thinking of going for a good dinner this weekend at San Antonio … but with this guy around, I’m not even sure if I wanted to do that. Kanneh …

There’s not a lot of beautiful people in Austin. Most of them are overweight. Coz they eat big servings of food. The diet stuffs that they’re eating alone could cause cellulite and the high fat content ones would cause instant heart attack.

But not the receptionist at the lab building though. She’s good looking. And friendly too. Kinda looked like Charlize Theron … blonde .. tall. The most important of all, she got a pair of big boobs. A bit saggy to our asian standards but, no one’s seriously complaining.

The time when she helped me to page for my host, she bent down a few times and I accidentally caugh a few glimpse of the deep natural ravine of her jugs. In case one’s wondering, she did wear her bra. But a very thin one - with an embossed effect of you-know-what.

The host that I’m having ? Those are a bunch of great guys. The one that worked with me most is an avid gamer and a wave surfer from California called Dave. Wears bermuda shorts to work and has a well built frame. Told me lots of stories about his experiences of witnessing massive gang brawls in California …

One of them is even a biker, who stands 6 ft something and over 300 pounds (Keith). He could seriously tip a full grown cow with that sheer size. Jokes around a lot and showed me plenty of pictures of him & buddies partying in a bike fest. You know … pictures of girls flashing … and choppers gathering.

Another one is Jase. Plump guy with a friendly face. Doesn’t know much about him but, he’s a bit more serious than the rest. But he’s an ok guy though.

During our lunch yesterday (first day), Jason asked me

Jase : “You’ll be seeing Keith wearing his traditional attire on his upcoming cultural festival..”

Me : “Yeah ? And what will he be wearing ?”

Dave : “A kilt. You know what’s a kilt ?”

Me : “I know. The man skirt. So you’re a Scottish Keith ?”

Keith : “Heheheh.. yeah I’m a Scott alright.”

Me : “Just wondering, you guys wearing anything beneath the kilt ? heheh”

Keith : “Absolutely, nothing. Nekkid inside. It’s easier to do it man. Just ride over the girls, flip kilt over ‘em, and that’s it…”

all of us : [laughed our daylights out]

It’s really a light day of work though. Came to work late .. long breaks .. and early dismissal. How I’d wish it’ll be like this back at my work place.

I wasn’t all alone for this assignment in Texas. I was actually joined by another engineer from China - let’s call him - cheecheongfun.

The first time I met cheecheongfun, he kinda gave me a good impression. No he did not look like a filthy mainlander who snorts out phlegm from their nostrils every single minute. He’s clean .. polite and kinda neat. He gave me an impression that he’s not actually from China at all … more like some university student that was here for a holiday.

That all went well, until the first day I went to work with him (which was on Monday 21st Austin time). I was told by the management to share my car with him .. so, I kinda have to fetch him to work everyday. Well… I’m ok with that, it was fun to drive there anyway.

So, on Monday morning, I hopped into our rented car and cranked the engine. He hopped in too … but instead, he hopped into the back seat (there’s only 2 of us). I was like … “goddamn, wtf ?”. Well, maybe it’s the culture thing - I thought… and so, I politely asked the guy to sit at the front seat - coz my real occupation isn’t a full time driver. He complied. (I told him in broken mandarin as I just discovered he couldn’t speak proper English…)

And then, when I started to screech down the highway (everyone’s speeding there…), I noticed that the seatbelt warning light was blinking. Cheecheongfun did not wear his seatbelt. Again, I politely requested him - better wear his seatbelt if he wanted to live in case of any accidents. And that’s the time when his eccentricity started to become more apparent — he got himself entangled with the fucking seatbelt !

I was stupefied by the entire incident. It appears that he doesn’t know what’s a seatbelt for … and doesn’t know how to wear them… all the while still entangled to it. I refused to believe that initially. I even told him to stop fooling around.. but I finally learned that he’s for real when I saw his upset face trying to wear the seatbelt.

Like a caring father, I had to teach him step by step how to wear a seatbelt. Heck, I even explained to him that seatbelt is fucking important for his safety …it saves life .. that the airbag won’t inflate if seatbelt is not worn…. shits like that. I was like teaching a newborn kid the concept of safety inside an automobile.

That was the time, my negative side attempted to take over myself. It’s telling me that he’s stupid - but I was struggling with my good side to argue that he’s just inexperienced. I refuse to submit to the evil side of myself of antagonizing the young china-man. No i won’t.

But…. as the day progresses, I began to discover more bad things about him. Things that convinces me that he’s worse than a retard. Here’s the list of them … summarized (i wouldn’t really want to go into the details..).

- his breath fucking stinks. And boy he loves to talk. Always in mandarin and always about redundant stuffs. It’s already very frustrating of not being able to understand most of the things he uttered .. and yet, I’ll have to endure his pungent breath of decomposing corpse.

- he eats like a pig. No, I’m not referring to his appetite. I’m referring to the acoustic level of him eating. When he eats, he could emit noises that could be heard from a few city blocks.

- when the American techs started explaining something, he would nod in acknowledgement - without really paying attention. Later, he would ask me tonnes of questions (in mandarin) about the things that has been explained. And I had to explain all over again to him … in broken mandarin.

- when I was working and analyzing some system, he would stick his head in front of my field of view - looking at what he wanted to look…. entirely blocking me from continuing my work. I felt like jamming his head into the pile of computer junks i’m working on .. but my instincts told me that it ain’t legal.

Somebody tell me that this guy is normal - and that I’m actually all wrong about him. Arghh..