June 8, 2004

Eric the disturbed – and chowhound

Went to have my lunch at a regular teochew porridge shop with my lunch members — Eric wolfed down 3 bowls of large porridge, 2 pieces of fried large eel, mowed down almost all the dishes on the table, a large glass of beverage… and a large packet of jackfruit.

He definitely dumbfucked everyone today. The very thought of the amount of food he took alone, is making me sick. It was as if we went to lunch with a walking garbage truck.

I then threw him a question out of my bedazzlement

Me : “Good grief!! What the fuck is wrong with you?? Growing up??”

Eric : “Uncle Eric is in the mood to eat today. Hehehh!”

Then another colleague remarked,

BigSnake : “Eric, you should be grateful that you are not born in places like southern India or Ethiopia… ”

Then Doug joined in,

Doug : “India will lose a portion of it’s continent on the map if this fucker were to be born there… He’ll eat everything up”

Eric : “You pussies are just jealous…”

Our snide remarks didn’t seem affect him much – as he continued to hoover everything on the table. And after that, he shouted out loud “Let’s go to whack some cendol… bebeh !”

Never had I seen someone with such a capacity to eat. It was as if his stomach has the magical ability to make food disappear without any need to digest them. If there’s any living person that could make a buffet chain restaurant go chapter eleven, Eric would be the one.

I told him that he is a reincarnation of a very screwed hungry ghost…. and he responded by letting out a comatose inducing fart.

Disturbed … indeed.

michaelooi  | characters  | 

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