March 30, 2004

explicit discussion

*18SX warning – reader’s discretion advised. The entry below contain some obscene elements that might offend some stupid ass individuals. If you think you are a person who can get easily offended about sexually explicit discussion or topics alike, or you’re a minor a.k.a kids, kindly leave by pressing ALT+F4. If you don’t know how to do that, you can alternately shove your head into the nearest toilet bowl and flush repeatedly until you stop breathing.

Today my lunch members and I discussed about some girl in our company who goes by the name ‘Brenda’.

A little description about Brenda here – despite being somewhat of a midget (she’s like, 5ft or less?), Brenda has the features that most guys would consider ‘attractive’. With her classy high profile cheek and lustrous wavy hair, it is very easy to like her, especially when she smiles. But the most standout thing of all, is her bosom. *alright kids, it’s getting real explicit here, still not too late to leave yet. Press ALT+F4 to leave

Now what about her bosom? Capital L legendary. She has a nice set of 34/35D rack, that bounces and makes gravity such a beautiful force to appreciate. Her rack is like the point of origin for all benchmark of titties. And as if it’s not already awesome enough, she also have big nipples… such that they always embossed on her tight fitting clothes. Her bras aren’t doing her a lot of justice to conceal that monster from peeking out beneath and she often has to wear multiple layers of clothes to hide that up from the public (a cardigan, usually). But whenever she’s out for lunch, she will usually leave her jacket or cardigan on her desk (hot maa…) and bounces around like she’s trying to kill all blokes in broad daylight.

During our discussion, we kind of stabbed at the question on why Brenda always have her nipples embossed on her clothes. My take on that was – large breasts are naturally heavier than normal boobs, and therefore, couldn’t be supported by conventional bras (a normal bra would just give way and snap due to the extra mass – imagine a thin wire supporting a heavy piece of stone slab). So, girls with huge rack would naturally have to resort to those special bras. Special rubber singlet type of sports bra with extra support.

And we all know these special sport bras usually have thin pads. Why thin pads? Because of the already large tits, it would be ridiculous to cover it with thick pads as that would make it look even bigger. Hence, those special bras need to be thinly padded to retain the breasts’ original contour. Thin pads means, less shielding on the nipples area — point number 1.

Point number 2. As we all know, the size of any tit is usually directly proportional to the size of the nipple. Why? Because it needed to be this way so that it is able to accommodate the volume of milk discharged from the gigantic glands. It all makes sense… a large dam wouldn’t be designed with a small output pipe water supply to the public. The pressure would be too high and the pipe will burst. Same thing here – just imagine the dam as a big tit and the pipe as the nipple. From the size of her tits, I reckon that her nipples have to be as big as a 50 cents coin… and probably hard enough to dent a car body…

Now, add those 2 points together, and we got the explanation on why she has her nipples embossed on her clothes all the time. It was a somewhat absurd and technical at the same time, and we all had fun laughing at the facts like a bunch of intoxicated hyenas. Big tits can be funny sometimes.

*Kid’s if you’re still reading this, you’re in trouble because you’ve just learned something you’re not suppose to know until you grow up. I would suggest you to type “I will not learn something I’m not suppose to know” repeatedly for 200 times on a notepad, print it out, burn it and mix the ashes with 10 bowls of holy water. Then drink it to cleanse the filth from your mind.

michaelooi  | enlightenments  | 

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